Wednesday, September 1, 2010


That's all I can say about my state of mind right now, I am FREAKING MAD.  I have been in that state all day long and I don't know that going to bed will and a "good night's sleep" will do anything but make it worse. 
I WON'T SLEEP, that's the point. 

What am I referring to?

Regular readers might find this unbelievable, but this has nothing to do with tenants, kids, dogs or even Herons. 

I am referring to WORK. 

Here's the story.  I go to work early every morning.  I do this that and the other thing before signing into the computer network.  I pull up my work email account and put on my communicator - it's a system to communicate with other associates in the network via instant messaging - through work only. 

I leave my up when I'm gone.  Our store is run by fully 2 people: the manager and me.  I don't have to worry about 50 or 100 people walking by an unattended computer and accessing personal information. It simply doesn't happen.  If I were at the main branch, I would NEVER leave my account open.  And let's clarify this here: I don't leave all that stuff up on the computer screen, it is accessible if you click on my email account of communicator (instant messaging).

Okay.  I am driving around doing the parameters of my job - delivering and picking up stuff (well, a lot of other things, but my job description is listed as a truck driver). I end up at our main branch downtown.  I have a load of stuff I brought from our branch to transfer to them - mainly 2,000 feet of sewer pipe that they need to fill orders.

I am sitting at a desk in the warehouse doing paperwork - always a lot of paperwork - when a guy comes out of the main store, looking at me, says to the people behind the dual, swinging doors: "He's right here!".  He walks off laughing, muttering comments under his breath.  What the bleep is THIS about?  I get up and walk in there.  "What's going on?" 

One of the counter guys says he has an instant message, FROM ME, that is going on RIGHT NOW.  The message is from "me" asking this guy if he wants to hang out this weekend and have some drinks.  Alarms.  I don't engage in this kind of childish behavior at work, I am 46 years old and this kind of shit is pure bullshit. I like to have fun in life, a person abusing their position in this capacity is total BULLSHIT.  I look at the IM and read everything.  I instantly came to the conclusion, in my mind, who was doing this.  This counter guy thought it was my manager, I thought differently. 

This person that started this IM continues on and on.  Do you want to hang out?.....followed by, "I like you".......followed by........."I like you alot".  The intonation is that I am going to have this guy over for drinks and then it's going to be GAY SHIT SEX.  FUCK A GUY UP THE ASS.

I'm sorry to the Christian readership here, I really am, but I am PISSED OFF.  I looked at this guy and wondered if he really thought it was me contacting him before I showed up and and refuted, without know it by mere act of BEING there, that it WAS NOT ME. 

This man was at the computer I use at work writing this stuff from my communicator/instant messenger.  The message shows that it is me, not him, writing the content of that material. 

Yes, I knew who wrote it because I heard he had done such things in the past.  However, those things did not include sexual BULLSHIT.  He is allegedly trying to teach the person a lesson that you should not leave your account open when not present at the computer.  All fine and dandy in a place that has dozens of emplooyees and even more contractors, vendors and people from other divisions walking in and out of there.  BS when it's a 2-man crew and MOST of the sales generated from the store are from the deliveries I make in the semi. 

Who is this person?  The Operations Manager.  Do you see anything such as abuse of power going on here?  The use of your position to do whatever you want because of the veritable lack of any kind of responsibility to be had on his part for saying WHATEVER he pleases?  Further, with the gay shit, SEXUAL HARRASMENT.  Can anyone say LAWSUIT?  I'm NOT gay, but if the guy is going to paint me that and there are several witnesses to it, why the bleep should I take another iota's minute's worth of this SHIT that I have endured in my life span because of some IDIOT that thinks they can do what they want, when they want to?  Ohhh, yes, the economy. SCREW the economy, I determined long ago, after being ABUSED by management at various companies, that I would NOT put up with it even if it mean LEAVING THE FREAKING COMPANY or risk being FIRED. 

The man could have simply approached me and said that the company does not want you to leave your account open like that - though I have NEVER read any such thing on any of the REAMS of company documents I have seen.  It MAY be there somewhere, I don't know.  NO, he has to start SHIT with me by IMPERSONATING me, that's what it is, impersonation.  I am going to look into labor laws and such, there is NO WAY I am going to just tolerate this stuff.  Yes, I am mad. I'm not just upset, I AM MAD.  I HATE being treated this way by ANY management.  My company does not stand ethical corruption and to me, this is ALL about ethics and morals. 

Ahhh, BenB taking a deep breath.  There is, actually, more to this story but I cannot go into it right now.  I can feel my innards in the way that only anger brings up.  It is not good for me and I would like to actually sleep tonight.  I must stop now. 



Came home yesterday from work to find things "out of place". Couldn't quite put my finger on it, so I checked video surveillance.

Ahhh, good ole surveillance cameras. They always give it away.

2 black boys, ditching school. I didn't throw the black kids out, they just don't come around much since Michael isn't there anymore. However, I do not believe my house should be some sort of refuge to take cover in while playing hookie and I will be addressing that post haste.

Fishies: I am pulling plants out of the water and doing head counts every day now. I SHOULD have 18 fish in there, large ones anyway, I actually have 12. If I lose any more of them, then I will be putting up fencing around the pond edge to keep birds/Herons out, as they are the only thing around that could eat a fish that big.

The experts tell you to look around your yard, sometimes they pick up a fish to fly off with it and then drop it. No fish bodies. I mean, if the bird already has the fish, he might as well eat it versus just letting it lay on the ground to rot.

I prefer them not even coming around my yard, thank you very much.

Turtles are still plain terrified. No biggies now that I have the info I needed to figure out what to do with them concerning their terror: nothing. And now I know I can simply put them in a cardboard box lined with a quilt or something and "store" them in the shed for the winter. Don't have to worry about them freezing to death in the cold water. Hey, that's what the expert told me to do, just store them on a high shelf in the shed from mid October to sometime in - March I think he said.

Whatever. I haven't done any work on that pond instllation in over a week, I simply decided to take a break from it. I will, however, be starting back up as I have noticed that this work must be part of the impetus that was causing me to lose weight which, as soon as I stopped the work, is also another point where weight loss also stopped.

Okay, folks, it's the first day of September. My "mind-frame" will begin to change as the temps and weather change along with it. That probably won't be happening today since the forecast high is 107, but still. Just the fact that the 3 hottest months are done and over with is enough to get me into a bit better - mood. Probably the extreme use of electricity is what sours things for me as I see my money going to operate a piece of machinery that cools the house.......

So, do I go for the year-long plan that equalizes the amount paid every month? Dunno yet. October is when they said to do it. I rather enjoy the 7 or 8 months of not having high electric use/bills. Just that summer always catches me and I am always struggling to get the money to pay it up - and this year was easily the high electric use in terms of money that I have ever seen being chucked out the window.

Well, anyway, work day almost here, only one thing to do in truck routing system but - it's better than nothing.



Trip done and over with.  Now, the funny part: the morning I left, another driver before me had loaded for Brownsville. He is still in Brown...