Saturday, March 3, 2012

Coco

My beautiful Great Dane/Catahoula mix was put down at 8:38 pm today, 32 minutes ago.
I had been attempting to prepare myself for this for the last few days now.
I know the sight of a dog that is at their last, and she was definitely there.

She was so weak today that she could barely get up and she could hardly walk, bumping
against the walls as she tried to get outside to urinate.  That was it, I took her to an animal
hospital in Gilbert, AZ for one, last, final attempt.

But as I was driving there, I had the gut feeling that this wasn't going to end well.  I've
been a dog owner all my life and I have been down this road several times now.
The vet had taken a sample out of her belly, which was huge.  She said that it was fluid
from her belly and went down a rather short list of things that it could be.  Heart disease,
cancer, a few other things.

When she came back with an estimate of how much it would cost just to try and find out
what was wrong with her - $1,686.00 - well that was the last straw.  I don't have that kind of
money to fork out on a dog.  We had a frank discussion and then I started crying.  When they
brought her into the room I was in, I then started balling.  They left me alone with her after
I had made the decision that it was time for her to be put down and I just cried while stroking
her soft, furry coat.

I wanted to be there for her passing, that she wouldn't die looking into the eyes of a stranger.
So I stayed.  She pulled out the syringe, they already had the thing in her vein, I was speaking softly
into my dog's ear and stroking her head, giving her a kiss here and there, saying goodbye to her.

She passed in front of me.

She was one of the best dogs that I have ever had.  She was so incredibly smart, agile, full of life and
energy.  Loyal, she would follow me everywhere.  I may still have 2 other Great Danes here, but it is
going to take a while to get used to coming home and not having her jumping up and down, making the
noise she made, greeting me and leading the way to the door.

She had been rejected by 4 families, being carted around on Craigslist when I first got her.  She had such
separation anxiety that she would do anything to get out of the yard when I would leave.  2 weeks after
I brought her home, my house burned down, but I was able to find a place to live that would take a dog
that large.

Over time, she got over the separation issue and was fully content to let me go in the mornings when I headed off to work because she knew I would be coming home later.

I will miss her, dearly.

Bye, Coco, I love you sweety.

ben

5 comments:

Lowandslow said...

It was the compassionate thing to do, Ben. I'll shed a tear with you. People who don't have dogs will never understand how much we care for them. You'll see her again someday. :(

S

BenB said...

Thanks Scott, for that. It was just 3 weeks ago and she was perfectly healthy, jumping up and down running around. It might take me a little longer to get over this one than others, I just loved that dog so much.

Dorrie said...

ditto what Scott wrote. My cat is fine at the moment, but I'm afraid her time will soon come (she's 17 yrs old after all) and I think it's better to "put them out of their misery" then to try and hang on.

{hugs}

Anonymous said...

I'm so so sorry, Ben on your loss of your dearly loved companion. I'm teary just typing this as I was really hoping that she would pull through. My heart goes out to you.

Lynne
Western Australia

BenB said...

Thanks Dorrie and Lynne, I appreciate it.

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