Showing posts from March 4, 2012
I have to vent this, because it is a sight that will never leave me.
Coco was supposed to just pass out and that would be the end of it.
A little muscle twitching would occur after she passed.
The vet did not give her enough of the fluid.
She was on the stretcher, upright.
When the fluid hit her, she laid down, so to speak.
I was looking into her eyes and telling her how much I loved her.
Then there was a bit of twitching, which was expected.
A few more seconds.
Her gaze was fixed on me.
Then, violent, extreme body convulsions.
Her mouth opened wide and she let out shreiks.
The vet pulled out another syringe and injected it into her: "Oh, I better give her more".
This will never leave me and this is what is causing me more grief than anything, that
my dog suffered, that what was "supposed" to happen, didn't.




I wrote my pastor last night telling him I probably wouldn't be in church today because of my dog's passing.
I'm still a bit of a train wreck here, I am going to miss that dog terribly.

He wrote back and told me how he had to put his Golden Retriever down a few years back and that it was one of the hardest things he had ever had to do - and then told me he would see me in church tomorrow, which is now today of course.  Maybe, maybe I will go, but I woke up this morning, looked over at her empty bed and started all over again.  I don't really like showing that kind of emotion in front of people, going to church may be a bit much.

I was thinking about the drive to the animal hospital last night.  I remembered thinking: if they tell me I have to put that dog down, I am not ready for that.  I can't do that today. The whole situation changed in that little room, with her laying there, breathing semi-heavy - apparently she had fluid around the lungs as well according to…