Saturday, November 21, 2015

I found more fencing, but it's soooo far away, just doesn't seem worth driving that far for it - though the price is fractional of what you would normally pay for it.  I mean, 10 cents on the dollar type of fractional.  Not really much else I am going to do back there until I get this resolved, so I am really kinda trying to ramp this up and see if I can find something a bit closer.

They are gone for the weekend - which really doesn't change much of anything for me, won't be doing anything different than I normally would.  Cept' cleaning up after Addler.  He has decided that crapping on the cement is a fine place to go doo-doo.  Silly dog. Oh well, the stuff has to be cleaned up regardless of where he does it, just a lot less visible and mess to clean up in the grass.  Likely he started doing that because of the rain, but rest assured, once a dog finds a place in a yard they like to do it? It will stay that way forever no matter how hard you try to get them to do it elsewhere. Ample experience in that department, a fruitless waste of time to even try.

I was going to take him for a walk today, but my outing to the hair salon and then Walmart nixed that.  I wasn't even doing that much and I was getting winded. Still sick, just gonna take it easy, the dog will live without it until I get better.  I did get my little space heater - that bathroom is cold in the morning and we aren't even close to what it's going to be like this winter.  Found thermals - finally - at Walmart and got what I needed of that as well.  I'm pretty much set for winter at work now.  Thinsulate caps, waterproof boots, thermals, thermal sweater, alpaca socks, just bought a camo overall at work - it's very heavy, very thick.  Work coats, gloves, not much else I can think of.  I am not good for being at work and getting wet and cold and having wet feet all day long.

But I am growing more and more weary of this workplace.  The other driver and I pretty much unloaded on the manager - in a nice way of course - about the "new" driver.  He is lazy, just wants to sit behind the wheel of a truck all day long.  He hates working in the yard and has made that unendingly clear - to us anyway - he keeps that s*** zipped around management.  No matter, management knows. He is still a temp driver and I hope they get rid of him and try someone else.


Well this is moving right along. She apparently must think divorcing a person after 5 months of marriage is - somehow - normal and shouldn't be a big deal? Val, that is.  At some point, I do intend on addressing - via email since that's the only way she will even respond to me - the totally lame way she ended this relationship.  Taking my stuff here - now called home - without telling me and then down the road, ending it by sending me copies of the divorce papers via email. There was no, Ben, I want to end this relationship - usually done in person, certainly concerning a marriage.  In fact, there was never any of that. It was just here's the divorce papers, here we go.

In any case, her daughter has the papers finalized and asked me if I wanted to see it via email or just read it when she gets here?  Ummm, yeah, nano-second's worth of thought: email it to me for I am going to read it all over.  If there is some legaleze in there that I don't understand, you can be rest assured I will fully understand it before any signing off occurs.

I will be looking for a female friend - and a friend only to start - pretty much right after this an official decree is made.  Why? Because I desire that kind of relationship.  Because now I won't allow myself to get dragged into an unhealthy one.  I went the full route with this one because that's what I came out here for.  It may be faulted reasoning, so be-it.  I came out here to marry her, I certainly had no other business to transact here.  I never even heard of Longview, TX before she came along.

Enough for now. Awaiting her (daughter's) reply.  The "Final Decree" is just another form.  Apparently Texas just does forms for doing divorces.  I'm glad I didn't pay a lawyer, this is all very simple and very easy to understand. I approved the decree, the only other thing - for now - that I have to do is sign off on it ... and....she has to bring over my stuff.  That is not debatable.


  1. Ben - trust me, there is NO.POINT.WHATSOEVER. in raising the subject of what she did or didn't do in the relationship. NO good of it will come of it WHATEVER.

    What benefit do you possibly see to doing so?? Fin

  2. Huh? Where do you get that I am bringing that up besides the thoughts running through my head?

  3. Val, that is. At some point, I do intend on addressing - via email since that's the only way she will even respond to me - the totally lame way she ended this relationship.

  4. Oh,yes, next time simply tell me what the issue is for I had no idea what you were referring to. It serves it's purpose for me, no-one else. She adamantely stated in the past that ending a relationship via the internet - which I would never do - was lame. Those were her words. I went to a great deal of trouble and change and shifting in my life to come out here to spend what was presumably the rest of my life with her. She didn't live down the street and around the corner, she lived almost 1,300 miles away. For her to end this relationship via the internet is bs and yes, I will eventually confront her on it.

  5. There are some things that I am not willing to argue about, this is one of them. To claim to be Christian and then come along and say it wasn't God's will - after consulting all the godly leaders that we did - and end this the way she is. So very easy. NO communication with me at all. It's like buying something on Ebay. You click on buy-it-now, you confirm your order, you pay for it via Paypal, you get it sent to you in the mail or through Fed Ex or UPS. It's so convenient and sterile. No communication whatsoever. Her life IS out here, MINE is NOT. I'm not looking to start some kind of altercation with her and this probably won't happen any time soon. But this whole thing is Twilight Zonish. As if she never knew me. Like we are complete strangers making a transaction that need only a signature.

  6. ok. understand and appreciate the explanation.

    good luck


  7. re: She apparently must think divorcing a person after 5 months of marriage is - somehow - normal and shouldn't be a big deal?
    Nothing about this relationship has been normal. Why does this come as a surprise to you?

  8. Not surprising. I have to sometimes remind myself the incredulousness that this relationship - was.


In Brownsville, at the America's Best Value Inn.  I really like this place for the price.  Granite top tables and counters, tile floorin...