Confession

Not a grand confession, but one that I must air out.
I have done so about this issue a few times here, gonna go there again.

I sometimes get extremely irritated, annoyed and aggravated with people in my home.
This has nothing to do with whatever they are doing, either.  That is another issue
entirely.

No, there are times when I just want to be alone.  I don't want people walking through
here, even if they aren't saying a word to me at all. I don't actually tell them my
annoyance, I just am, internally, fuming greatly.

Yes, this is my choice to have all these people in here - it's that or leave the house
and have to find a new place to live.  Yet another mind battle that has consumed me
for some time now. 

But there are times when I am, at least internally, extremey agitated with the amount of
traffic going through here.  If I'm in the house, I want to be on my computer, which is
located in the kitchen. It is hard-wired to the modem and I am not going to change that.

The situation will change a bit now.  I am typing this off of my new laptop and this keyboard
is much easier to use than other laptops I have used in the past.  I am getting used to it and
could do this indefinitely off of here versus having to do it off of the "main" computer. 

Meaning, when this irritation hits me, I can just head to my bedroom.  If I want on a
computer, the laptop is connected to my wifi.  I think a major source of internal agitation
in my life may very well be abated.  I like the internet - many people do - it has become
the norm for a large percentage of the population.  Not that I don't get up and go do something
else, I am not going to become beholden to these things, but it's the way things get done in
these days and anyone that doesn't want to accept that - well - good luck.  I grew up without
computers and didn't get a real taste of them until in my late 20's. You?

No, nothing will take the place of the great outdoors in my life, even if it's only here, at
my house, working on my landscaping.  I am hopeful next year will bring a new chapter in
making trips up north to mom's property. But then again, I will not be spending ALL of
my time hiking in the mountains, I will still want to get on the internet. 

To that cause, I will be making a trip up there soon.  I will get up to my mom's property and
I will have this computer and the router and I will see what, if any, kind of access I have to
the internet up there.  There have been many things that have confronted me with this idea of
going up there on weekends and getting away from the Phoenix area, which, admittedly, I
do not like. I quite dislike living here.  "Why would you live in an area you don't like?".
Great question, but it would take a small book to write about, at least for me, so I am not
going there right now.

But let me tell you something: the idea of going up to the mountains, taking all the dogs with me and
traipsing about in the woods is extremely appealing to me.  The dogs will love it and so will I. 
There is a connection with God, amongst other benefits up there, in the wilderness, away from
people that is not to be found "down here". 

Umm, well anyway.  It's time to go to bed.  The shooting range tomorrow morning should be
fun. 

G'nite.

ben

Saturday 11/26/2011

Now it's going to eat at me until I drive up there and find out whether it works or not.
I'm referring to Verizon Wirless, the mobile broadband service I just signed up for with them and
whether that mobile broadband is going to work at my mother's property.  I looked again at another
coverage map and it has the entire area covered in red, meaning it does, allegedly, have coverage
up there.

Well I ain't going up there this weekend. I am going back to mom's again tomorrow - her Sun City
property, not her mountain property.  A trip  up there will have to wait.  If it works around town -
which it better - that will at least be something.  Instead, I am heading to Tempe Firearms and getting a case for my 12 gauge shotgun, something I should have a while back.

__________________________________

Another long interlude.  Lynnette came in and I told her it's time to go and get this taken care of.  That being getting the space locked down for the trailer.  I don't want to do it, she doesn't want to leave, I can't help that right now.  Again, I think it would be extremely lame and pathetic to give someone else a 30 day notice to move out for this reason. I can think of many OTHER reasons I would give such a notice, but not for this and I couldn't, in good conscience, do that.

Besides, the lot rent over there is not that much more than what they are paying to live here.  I was charging them enough cover utilities, but they decided they would pay more, apparently to make me happy, though I never complained.  I actually didn't want to take the money from them, but they insisted and for a while now, they have been paying more than what the electricity and water usage costs to have them here.  The problem is that the lot rent does not include electricity over there.  It probably won't be the much, but every penny counts when you are in the position that they are.

The place?  Illegal alien town.  The man that owns and runs the place is an older, very nice gentleman, we talked for about 45 minutes.  There were no back ground checks -how could there be with all the illegals living there - and the only thing he required was the lot rent and a deposit for electricity.  Very, very old trailers in there.  I mean, we're talking 40 years old.  Small.  Mostly dirt lots.  Some had them nicely landscaped, though.  Obviously the man doesn't require landscaping, but some took enough pride to really have a nice looking place - most did not.  My 5th wheel will be one of the newest units in there, considering it's a 1987 model, that isn't really saying much.  Lynnette doesn't want to leave, Mark is all gung-ho, let's get this over with and get moved.

I'm with Mark. I can't afford nor do I want a lawsuit from the City of Phoenix or even worse, some sort of criminal charges.  They can levy a huge fine and create a low level misdemeanor for not dealing with this issue by the date they say I have to "fix" the problem.  I'm not willing to push the limits here, the potential outcomes are not appealing in any way, shape or form.  They understand this, at the least.  So, I paid the lot rent and the deposit and got that over with.  She will repay me by the week, as is the case currently.  She started crying this morning, telling me: "I have something to tell you".  I won't go into the details, just to say it was extreme thankfulness for helping them out. Yes, well, they are good people in a bad situation.  They have problems, but don't we all.  The Bible tells us to do good whenever we can.

This is my operations manual for life: the Bible.  I am not saying I am adept at following it to the nth degree, but I am trying my best.  They have a place to live and that trailer is actually pretty nice inside. It needs new wallpaper, also, but other than that, it's not in bad condition and almost everything works in it.  It has no leaks in the roof, either, it hasn't since I bought it.  Unlike the one I am going to put up on mom's property, gag.  I don't much care being told something about a thing I am buying and come to find out it isn't quite what the person claims it is.  But, the fixes aren't all that bad, I am waiting for the new parts for the AC to arrive - another thing that allegedly worked - and then I will get up there and go to town on that roof.  What's more important, at least to me, is that they LIKE living in that thing.  They can get away from each other as well.  She goes up in the loft and reads a book in bed and he stays at the rear of the thing and watches TV when they need separation time.  We ALL need that from time to time, I don't care how much you are in love with a mate, if you are living with one!

So that's done.  I took them to my newly found and favorite Chinese buffet restaurant and we all 3 got take out.  I went to the gun store next door - they don't sell cases for guns.  Bunk.  I stopped at another gun store on the way home, they sell the case I needed and it was pretty cheap price but looked good at $17.  Bought some .22 ammo for that old rifle my brother bought for Caleb a long time ago.  I will be taking an old .22 rifle; a 12-gauge shotgun and a Smith & Wesson .40 caliber SW40VE Sigma to the range tomorrow morning.  Mom will be taking her Beretta and some other gun, a 9mm I believe. I have 150 target rounds for the .40 cal, so I will be doing some shooting with that thing to get a feel for it.  The first and only time I shot it - without hearing protection - was literally a shocking experience with the noise level SO high, that won't be happening again.  Well, if it does, that means I am firing it off for self-protection in my home, a thing I hope never has to happen.

Changing the subject, I am running my new laptop off of my Verizon mobile broadband right now. Not on this application, I am using my desktop writing this, I have it running on the kitchen table next to me, though I set the router up high so it could get a better reception.  It is running Cafe World - an online game that uses a LOT of bandwidth, I believe, it certainly taps it out, but it is running the game.  I just wanted to see if it would run the game is all.  It does, though it takes a while for it to load it.  Once it's going, though, it's running as well as my home computer.  The game's use of computer resources sucks the battery dry pretty quickly, though.  Both on the laptop and the router.  No biggies, my intended use will be near electrical outlets where both can be plugged in.

Not wanting to get into another Michael/Anthony situation, I had to lay down the law today.  There is a neighborhood kid - 14 years old - that comes over here frequently to walk 1 or more of my dogs for a few bucks.  I don't mind give a couple of dollars if a kid doesn't mind doing it that cheap.  What can  I say, I just don't want to fork out "real" money to have the dogs walked.  Anyway, him and one of his younger brothers are sitting there, outside on the pond side of my house, playing with each other and I go out there to make sure they aren't destroying anything.  At least they are respectful kids if nothing else.  They're sitting there, looking at me asking if they can move in! ROFL!!  No, was the immediate reply, you cannot, you have a home, you have a room, be happy with what you got.  I understand - they are living in an impoverished house-hold.  They have next-to-nothing.  But, they have a roof over their heads and they have parents that love them and feed them. If  you have nothing else as a kid, you have plenty with just that.

I should know, I grew up in just such conditions. My parents were very poor when I was a kid in Pittsburgh and we lived in what would be considered to be the ghetto.  My parents struggled to get food on the table and they struggled to pay bills - just regular electric and water.  Cable/satellite didn't even exist then.  Funny what we consider "necessities" now that weren't even invented back in the day, such as cell phones.  I never thought for one second, however, that I should want to move in with the "richer" people on the block.  On my street, I am considered rich by the kids.  20 miles north of me, I would be considered a street bum when comparing finances (Paradise Valley; Scottsdale areas).

So, I don't really get when kids start talking like that.  I do get that I will never allow that to happen again, I went through enough hell with that other family, I need not force myself through that again. Instead, I send food home with the kid here and there.  He gets money for walking the dogs- not much but I believe he hands that over to his parents.  I have more sympathy for a person - whether a kid or an adult - if they are not doing drugs, not stealing and not giving into the rather evil ways of this world.  Or attempting to make excuses to engage in such simply because they are poor.  There are a lot of poor people in this world that still have morals and values, as good as anyone's regardless of economic status.

In the eyes of God, we are all equals, which is nice to know.  God is "no respector of persons", the Bible says.  We are all just men and women and children, He loves us all equally.  The next question then, was: "Well can we hang out over here whenever we want?", pleading eyes and all.  Again, I am not getting involved in another family's problems such as I did with that last group of people.  I can help them, yes, but I don't have to go beyond that.  Okay, there is a qualifier here: the father is a drunk.  He loves his kids, but when he's drunk, he's violent.  I don't know if he beats on those kids or what.  They are always talking about their drunk father and his mal intentions.

Whatever.  Life never stops, I'll say that much.  You get past one thing and something else pops up.  I don't think that ever goes away, to be honest.  I think this is what life IS about, going through all this stuff and becoming the person you are - more importantly, the choices you make and how they will be judged at the end.  No clue.  Deal with this situation as it evolves. I have yet to actually meet the parents - though they don't speak English.  I see them and wave here and there, they live all of 3 houses down from me.  A single-wide, old mobile-home with a lot of people living in it.

Here's what's really getting to me right now: Mark and Lynnette leaving.  Not that I will miss them greatly, I can stop by on the way home whenever and visit with them.  No, that they won't be here when I'm at work to basically protect my property.  This is what most people would consider a bad neighborhood in terms of thieves.  Lots and lots of thieves.  Young and old alike. So, I am going to have to go get duplicates made for the back door lock and get those in the hands of the tenants and insist that they lock the door behind them every time they leave unless I am home.  Well, it's certainly not abnormal to lock your doors when you leave, yes?

Life is going to change a bit around here, I do believe.

G'day.

ben