Confession

Not a grand confession, but one that I must air out.
I have done so about this issue a few times here, gonna go there again.

I sometimes get extremely irritated, annoyed and aggravated with people in my home.
This has nothing to do with whatever they are doing, either.  That is another issue
entirely.

No, there are times when I just want to be alone.  I don't want people walking through
here, even if they aren't saying a word to me at all. I don't actually tell them my
annoyance, I just am, internally, fuming greatly.

Yes, this is my choice to have all these people in here - it's that or leave the house
and have to find a new place to live.  Yet another mind battle that has consumed me
for some time now. 

But there are times when I am, at least internally, extremey agitated with the amount of
traffic going through here.  If I'm in the house, I want to be on my computer, which is
located in the kitchen. It is hard-wired to the modem and I am not going to change that.

The situation will change a bit now.  I am typing this off of my new laptop and this keyboard
is much easier to use than other laptops I have used in the past.  I am getting used to it and
could do this indefinitely off of here versus having to do it off of the "main" computer. 

Meaning, when this irritation hits me, I can just head to my bedroom.  If I want on a
computer, the laptop is connected to my wifi.  I think a major source of internal agitation
in my life may very well be abated.  I like the internet - many people do - it has become
the norm for a large percentage of the population.  Not that I don't get up and go do something
else, I am not going to become beholden to these things, but it's the way things get done in
these days and anyone that doesn't want to accept that - well - good luck.  I grew up without
computers and didn't get a real taste of them until in my late 20's. You?

No, nothing will take the place of the great outdoors in my life, even if it's only here, at
my house, working on my landscaping.  I am hopeful next year will bring a new chapter in
making trips up north to mom's property. But then again, I will not be spending ALL of
my time hiking in the mountains, I will still want to get on the internet. 

To that cause, I will be making a trip up there soon.  I will get up to my mom's property and
I will have this computer and the router and I will see what, if any, kind of access I have to
the internet up there.  There have been many things that have confronted me with this idea of
going up there on weekends and getting away from the Phoenix area, which, admittedly, I
do not like. I quite dislike living here.  "Why would you live in an area you don't like?".
Great question, but it would take a small book to write about, at least for me, so I am not
going there right now.

But let me tell you something: the idea of going up to the mountains, taking all the dogs with me and
traipsing about in the woods is extremely appealing to me.  The dogs will love it and so will I. 
There is a connection with God, amongst other benefits up there, in the wilderness, away from
people that is not to be found "down here". 

Umm, well anyway.  It's time to go to bed.  The shooting range tomorrow morning should be
fun. 

G'nite.

ben