Wednesday, December 2, 2015

I walked into the courtroom - 15 minutes early allegedly - sat down and 2 minutes later the judge called her up to the bench and proclaimed I must not be there.  Apparently they had had this discussion and were waiting  Naomi had informed me that it was at 11:15, but obviously it was supposed to start at 11.  She - Val -- had an extremely fake smile plastered on her face.  I said nothing to her.  I didn't go there to get into it with her, I went to make sure that no shenanigans were going to be pulled. Not that I expected it, but you never know.  The judge recited legaleze, we agreed, he declared the marriage terminated and that was that.

I am now, officially, a divorced man, yet again. Easy divroce, no conflict, no disagreements on property, no children to deal with.  I was only gone an hour and got divorced, went to the gas station, went to the bank, another store, KFC for lunch and home.

When I walked out of the courtroom, she called my name - I was and am in no mood to talk to her - handed me an envelope with the 4 wheeler title - she has the other one for it's still over there and I haven't made up my mind about it - and then asked if I had made up my mind - which I have not.  When do you expect to? Soon. Okay, thank you and that was it.  And I assume that to BE it for the rest of our lives.  I really wanted to visit Duke's grave one last time before all of this was over with, but, too late.

I have no feelings of "freedom" like I did the first marriage.  A bit sad, actually.  Giving up as much as I did and doing what I did to marry her wasn't exactly a small thing for me.  She dismissed it - asking me what I gave up, as if nothing.

Whatever the case and not delving into that again, I have numerous decisions to make.  Stay, go.  Find a new job.  Start dating again or not.  Live here where I'm at if I do decide to stay or get my own place and rent out rooms.

I'm going to wait on any job decisions until after the New Year.  I likely going to start looking around for someone to start a relationship with.  Not positive on that one, just thinking about it.  Staying here is cool as long as they are cool with me being here, actually.  I'm just not sure I will want to stay in this region with what has happened.  I don't know how my thinking is going to be whenever I go into Longview now that we are officially divorced and thinking about all the memories - mostly bad unfortunately - and what occurred.

So, nothing has to be decided today.  They are home today as well.  Dude was told to stay home today for lack of work, she came home after finding out she has laringitis.  Don't actually remmeber how to spell that word, but if I recall correctly, it is highly contagious.  I don't realy need to be getting sick again now that I am finally just about done with the last garbage.














2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Pretty nasty telling you it was at 11:15 when it was really at 11. I know you wanted a different ending to you and Val, I know you put in a lot of effort in making something good of it. Sorry. Sending you good vibes to beginning a new chapter in your life. ~jf

BenB said...

Thank you. I am putting this all behind me now. It's history and I am going to move on. I put my best effort into it and I have no regrets as far as that goes.

 Thursday - mid afternoon Yup, I haven't posted in several days. I've actually written some but I never posted the stuff.  Just neve...