For almost 4 weeks, I've had this swelling going on in my upper left eyelid.  I didn't know what caused it, I just figured it would eventually go away by itself.  But it wasn't and this morning I thought - hmmm - if I quit this job I won't have health care for 90 days.  So I went into an express care place this morning - Sunday that is - and figured they would give me some kind of antibiotic.

And that's exactly what the doctor was going to do. "Well, we're going to give you an antibiotic and that should take care of the problem. But if it persists for any length of time, come back".  Well, I repleid, it's already been almost 4 weeks.  He was on his way out the door to write a prescription but those words stopped him in his tracks.  I'll be right back.  I didn't like the sound of that.

He came back, with an assistant, put a couple drops of anesthetic in my eye and gave it a few minutes.  How did he check to find out of it was working? Stick a needle in the eyelid.  It wasn't working.  I didn't say anything, let's get this over with.  I had no idea that he was going stab that eyelid repeatedly, over and over and over, 30 - 40 times.  Stab it, squeeze the eyelid, apply copious amount of pressure that was causing my eyeball to hurt under the pressure - which is when I did say something, let's not cause any damage here please.

Blood everywhere, he just kept picking at the abcess over and over with that needle.  He left for a minute, came back and started all over again!  We finally got to the end of this, he kept putting saline solution in my eye to clean out the blood. Finally called it done.  Thank God Almighty.  Got done with that, headed up front.  You don't owe anything.  Okay.  Paying for health care, might as well use it while I have it.  Headed to CVS.  Pharmacy closed.  Oh, we'll be open in 10 minutes.  Okay.  Got the prescription, was heading out and decided to get some wrinkle cream for my face.  Looking pretty - bad - there.  I've used it before, it actually works.  Got a box that said $5.99 in a sea of boxes that had over 20 listed.

Dude at counter rings it up. That will be $22.79.  Huh?  I walked back over and checked, clearly stated $5.99. He called another person to check it.  Yup, these boxes are in the wrong location. I got the cream for $5.99.  I didn't ask him for that, he just did it, I was going to leave without it.

Now, back at home, thinking.  General manager came up from Baton Rouge on Friday.  Why did he do that?  He never comes up at the end of the week, his visits are always at the beginning of the week and usually stays for several days or the entire week. My mind has gone to all the fear issues.  Bringing a final paycheck to fire me.  Giving instructions what to do with me, who knows.  Don't have a good feeling about it, but it's whatever.  I'm glad I waited to make a decision on what company to work for  for I got the ball rolling on hazmat and I hope to eventually find a job that pays much better with that endorsement.  It always does, but you still have to find a job that works for your lifestyle.  Now, back to the gm, after he was going on about this pay stuff on the phone the other day, I flat out asked  him if he wanted me to leave.

It sure was sounding that way.  No! He replied.  Now, that doesn't mean he didn't change his mind.  I guess I am a bit perplexed by him going up there on Friday, that is not usual modus operandi for him.
I'll find out tomorrow morning if anything - not good - becomes of it.  If I've learned anything in life, it's not to make rash or quick decisions. Now I did make a fast decision to start looking for a job and I have talked to countless recruiters, but I haven't actually pulled the trigger on any of them yet.  Trucking companies are in a deseperate contest to try and lure drivers to their companies.  It's that bad.  They all have tractors sitting there, empty, waiting to be driven  and enough business to keep you driving.

At least I do have my old manager on my side.  That didn't come from him directly, that came through my co worker who was sitting in the new manager's office decidedly stating that he hopes I don't quit.  Well of course, he's an outside salesman now and getting the product delivered to the jobsites on time with correctly pulled orders is something he is focused on.  Regardless, whoever is on what side, the pay is the serious  issue that the gm has flatly stated isn't going to change.  "Not a good business decision right now".  But, you don't mind keeping me around at greatly reduced pay yet doing the exact same job?  Yeah, I posed several questions that got either no answer at all or a fancy two-step.

It's a challenging environment to continue to work in since I've "made the waves" that no-one else there in any of the branches ever has.  Nobody has ever challenged us on this before.  Well maybe people should grow a set and speak up for themselves and even if it doesn't get you what you either want or need, at least you have the peace of mind that you tried before you left.  If I hadn't tried and hadn't pressed the issue, I wouldn't have felt good about quitting once I do pull the trigger.  But this hazmat and tanker endorsement opens up - hopefully - new avenues of opportunity to have a job that has me going home every night. But - the caveat is - usually is in trucking - that you have to have x amount of time OTR before they will consider it.  Why? Because you have a record and it can be verified as to whether you  screwed up with it or not.

It makes sense, I suppose, especially driving around 10,000 gallons of gasoline.  After my study the other day, the biggest concerns in tankers is taking curves and stopping.  I didn't realize that a quick stop could have the fluid in the tank forcing the truck into an intersection, called fluid surge.

Well, I'm going to look around on the internet for bulk fuel haulers today and get some names of companies that engage in such.  I still have to pass the Homeland Security background check - Lord only knows what criteria they use.