Monday, November 4, 2013

I just spent, literally, the entire day over at her house with all of those kids.  It was a very interesting day.  I was a little uneasy about all of them because I know how some of them feel about this situation.  They aren't actually happy about it, yet at the same time they don't seem to much care to be with their father.

Regardless, they didn't actually warm up to me right away.  In fact, that really didn't even begin to happen until much later on in the day, excepting the 15 year old.  Extremely talkative, 10 miles a minute kid with a motormouth that just won't stop.  He's the problem child, supposedly, well I believe it I just haven't seen it yet. They were all up in the bedroom upstairs taking pokes at me with her when she went up there after we had spent a lot of time there - which was okay with me, just teenage talk.

Ummm, anyway, long lapse, it's  Monday morning, have the whole week off dunno what we are doing today.  Dunno what we are going to do on any given day, just know that she has to haul around 3 of those kids with her at any given time during the work week, though apparently she is going to drop them on some folks who volunteered to watch them for a while, while i am here.

Meanwhile, still trying to get that room rented!  I dunno what the problem is, there have been several people over there already and no-one is taking it.  Just talked to a lady that works at the airport - which is all of 10 minutes away from my house.  She has weird hours and apparently has to drive back and forth to the airport to deal with customers checking in and such, so my location is a good one for her.  Probably  6 miles to the employee parking lot from my driveway.

But who knows, just posted another ad and will keep doing so.

Going into the details  of what's going on?  Well let's just say that it is better than either of us expected, which is a really good thing - for both of us.  If it stays on track as it is going, leaving on Saturday is not necessarily going to be an easy thing to do.  I don't know when I will be able to get back - the costs are a bit prohibitive in flying and renting a hotel room, but certainly not before 2014.

Christmas coming up, not that that is anything grand within our family.  IF I am able to make it until January without getting stopped by ADOT - Arizona Department of Transportation/Highway Patrol/ADOT Enforcement (a whole division specifically directed towards the "enforcement" of commercial vehicle laws and truck inspections), I will get a 2 week's worth of pay bonus and that would certainly pay for a trip back over here.

Sitting at a Denny's across the road from her store waiting for her to show up. She has a guy that runs it for her but I ain't going over there until she shows up. Heavily armed type of place because it deals in buying gold and silver.  I like Denny's coffee : )

G'day.

ben

Sunday, November 3, 2013

Didn't quite have time to pick up where I left off yesterday.  But after a couple of hours plus layover in Houston, we all boarded a much smaller jet to fly over to Tyler.  The thing powered up and got moving in a big hurry!  2 big jet engines for such a small plane!  Interesting flying over the land and seeing so much water everywhere - and much of it brown and/or putrid looking with a lot of dead trees lining the lakes besides them. What are they dumping into the water here?!!

Flying into Tyler, small airport.  Small brick building terminal.  Got my stuff and there she was, as beautiful and lovely in real person as what her pictures showed.  Just sayin', sometimes pics make people look MUCH better than when you meet them in-person!  Though it wouldn't have made any difference anyway about it, she is a beautiful person inside and that counts much more than external beauty.

I took her hand and gave her a big hug.  She has - never had that actually - in her past 20 year marriage so I guess it took her off-guard.  Well I don't guess it does, it did!  She was all giggly and trying to make excuses for not being used to it, I just shrugged it all off and said get used to it!  Lol.

We went to a restaurant and sat together for a couple of hours but - fatigue was setting in even though early.  I had to get some rest.  Friday's escapades in making 2 trips to the mountains and working until 6 pm and then getting ready to leave and then getting up at 3:45 am to get to the airport took it's toll on me.  She took me to the hotel - we hugged for probably a good 20 minutes, she couldn't get enough of it once she decided she liked it - and then finally got to get into bed and just close my eyes.

Sunday morning now, we're skipping church though I didn't want to.  She hasn't been divorced that long and she just didn't want to deal with the questions she thought she might get, though I have no idea why anyone would want to stick their nose into her business in such a way as to get uncomfortable with it, anyway.  But there are people in the church that are very judgmental, you will find that just about anywhere, unfortunately.  Personally, I don't tolerate such people because they are always extremely religious. I just start digging right back. "Really, well isn't that amazing. What skeletons do YOU have in YOUR closet".  I get right back into their face.  Everyone has their issues, faults and problems, no-one is immune.  To judge another person is to point 20 fingers back at yourself.

Whatever the case, we are going to her house in a few minutes. It's a brick house just short of 7,000 square feet and she is extremely embarrassed to have me over because she doesn't have control of the kids yet after a bad marriage and a husband who apparently didn't enforce anything with them. Leave a house go that size for that long a period of time - well I have braced myself for it.  But, in my mind, anything like that can be changed, especially a dirty house.  Might take quite a long time to bring it back to a good condition, just sayin' I'm ready for whatever scene may assault my senses since she has pretty much told me it's ugly.  She tries to get the kids to help her but - many times they ignore her or go to playing games shortly after getting started on their chores.

I have considered asking Mark to go out for a week and get the place cleaned up - for pay obviously.  He might just do it for enough money.  I dunno, she is totally open to it, that's for sure.  But, I'm gonna get over there in a few minutes and check it out.

Just trying to keep up with my blog a bit.

Happy Sunday!

ben

Saturday, November 2, 2013

Too much going on to write too many blog entries.  But at this moment, I am sitting at the airport, near the gate, waiting to board the plane, which will occur in a bit over an hour from now.

I haven't flown in sooooo long!  I don't know why they did it, but they sent me through the pre-screened line and no, I wasn't pre-screened.  Skipped a HUGE line by going through there!  The lady said I guess you are one of the lucky ones!  A BUNCH of TSA people standing all over the place, just not used to this.

Now I understand the theorem of dressing up a bit, most people here are in T shirts and blue jeans, shirts hanging out, no belts, sloppy appearance, etc. etc. etc.  I'm not exactly in a suit and tie, but I  am definitely not in blue jeans and t-shirt apparel.

Umm, well whatever.  I am kicking out a tenant as of today.  Dunno how that is going to go over, but Mark has no problem helping me with that because he doesn't like the guy anyway.

I have had 3 people over yesterday, Mark showed them all.  I have another wanting to come today to take the already vacated room, need to get the rented out quickly.

I'm just skirting through issues here, I haven't been on  a plane in so long I am a bit nervous.  I have never had any ill problems flying but still, it's been over 8 years.

So, I think I will end this one and maybe pick it up again when sitting in Houston for 3 hours, or not, I am actually wanting to sleep when I get there.

G'day.

ben

Monday, October 28, 2013

I left Friday afternoon, got up to the property, got everything fired up and then.......electric fault breaker on GFI outlet kept popping.  It was getting extremely irritating considering I had to keep walking to the pedestal to turn it back on.  I don't know why they installed a GFI on a pedestal!  I am going to get rid of it.  I have outdoor outlets with no GFI on them and I have seen plenty of other outlets at other places without them, dunno what the deal is.  I thought those things were meant for kitchens and bathrooms?

Well, anyway, Friday night after I went to bed the power went out again, of course and my white-noise generating fan went off with it. I  was too tired to get up, get dressed, put on shoes and go out there to push the thing in so I just tried to sleep without it.

Well try going to sleep without a noise that you have been listening to for over 25 years to sleep with and see how well that turns out!

The next morning, I got up, pushed it in, made coffee and then it went out again - but then, the second try, it stayed on.

Never-the-less, I had decided to go home.  I will but another outlet before I go up there again and install it.  I got what needed to be done in terms of going up there and draining out the water lines in the RV.  It only takes a few minutes to do, actually, but to not do it can mean a catastraphe.  I was glad I went though, it's really beautiful up there and the weather was awesome.

I made record time coming back, too, in an hour and a half.  I caught up to a Mercedes that was cruising along prolly around 70 and passed it.  Then it passed me.  Well, I wasn't in a race with this car, i was keep my speed constant, I guess he wanted to play a cat and mouse game which didn't really bother me as long as it doesn't get dangerous.  This occurred ALL the way back to the valley!

I got some stuff done at home as well on Saturday and Sunday, not to mention going to church.  The pastor still isn't back from his trip so another church leader did the service.  It was a great service albeit short.  

On the lady front, trouble in Denmark.  But not unexpected.  Not with her, but her ex.  He's going through the gamut of things.  He only takes his kids once every 2 weeks, but since I am coming, he doesn't want them at all while I am there!  He figures they should "bond" with me?!!!  This is those kid's dad for crying out loud!  Then he started interrogating his kids about what is going on between us - the lady and I - which the younger kids didn't like.  Then, the 15 year old boy started acting out and going ballistic on his mother.  It's kind of a mess but again, not unexpected.  I was given the whole rap about the family long before anything started getting serious.  I dunno, it's only 5 more days and I will be diving into all of this and finding out for myself just how far the rabbit trail goes..........

So that's it.  I will spend this week making sure everything is good around the house and then get up early Saturday morning, get to the airport and start this adventure.  I suspect this adventure is going to have it's ups and downs, to be honest, but I have to go out there and find out if this is really something that is going to work or not.  You can talk on the phone all day long and send tens of thousands of messages back and forth - which we literally have done at this point - but you don't really know until you meet the person in-person and also everything else that is going on in that person's life, especially the home.

Whatever the case, it's Monday morning and I need to get to work. Manager not coming in today so I only need get the truck loaded and ready to go and get out of here.

G'day.

ben

Thursday

My plan for tomorrow, in considering it works out that way, is to leave town shortly after I get off of work and head up the hill to my mom's property.  Still haven't decided whether I am going to stay one night or two, though.  Just before I leave, I will drain the entire water system out on the trailer and have the peace that the lines aren't going to freeze and burst over the winter.  Not that I don't intend on going up there at various times throughout the winter, I just haven't really wanted to go very much lately.

Well, anyway. The situation with the lady.  I haven't written this part of it out yet because I just haven't wanted to.  But, she has a lot of kids, numerous of them are teenagers and just about all of them mouth off and disrespect her to one degree or another.  Some of it is very, very serious.  To the point of cussing her out and throwing things in anger and destroying property.

I have told her repeatedly up front that I do not tolerate kids mouthing off to their mothers, period.  She doesn't have a clue how this is going to go over because she doesn't want me saying much of anything to them if they are acting out in front of me towards her.  I just had to tell her it would be very difficult for me to keep my peace if that goes on while I am there.
_________________________
Long interlude, like by a day, lol.  I am now up at the mountain property.  The GFI circuit is acting up and is turning the power off at random.  This is not a problem with the trailer, those circuits go bad after a while and/or can't handle the amount of power being used by an entire RV and just quite, blow out the circuit and then you have to go and keep resetting it.  Been there, done that, bought the farm. I spent the night here without my fan running cause it shut off in the middle of the night and I wasn't about to get up, get dressed and walk over there to reset it.

As it stands, it has gone off once while trying to make a pot of coffee.  If I would have given it any thought in the past, this potential situation would have come up in my mind and I would have bought a spare to have up here just in case.

Selah and oh well.  I'm going to drain out the water lines a little later and then I am going to head home.

Wednesday, October 23, 2013

Attempting to face the reality that I am going to have to drive up north this weekend and deal with the RV and drain out the water system.  I just don't want to go up there because I have other things I would really like to get done this weekend - selah.

So, hopefully head up Friday, stay overnight and come back Saturday?  I dunno yet.  Probably, though.  I want to hit church on Sunday morning and it's easier to get back the day before for that than to get up early on Sunday and attempt to make it home in time to get the dogs out, get showered, dressed and there on time.

Facing yet another tenant leaving - and this guy has been good about paying his rent and really, hasn't been here that much since he moved in - I don't know how long ago, maybe 4 or 5 months. He's headed back to Atlanta and I am headed back into the waters of attempting to find a decent person to take his place.

But, I have been preoccupied and I must find time to get these things done, lol.  I gotta have that income.
Anyway, just a short blip, on the way out the door for another day of work.

G'day.

ben

Saturday, October 19, 2013

What do you do with a weekend where you are intentionally trying to not exert energy so that you can get better?
Sit and here be driven half mad by people walking in and out and in and out.
I've had bronchitis too many times to remember in my life time, if there is one thing I remember about getting over it: DO NOT EXERT.  Do as little as possible until it passes.  I have had it last up to 3 months because I just wouldn't stop.  Well screw that, I don't want to be sick for months and I am doing what I can to get past this.

It does seem as though I am getting better, though, less coughing and stuff coming up, good signs I think.

But I do have things I want to get done today.  Haircut is really needed.  Would like to get a few new shirts maybe some casual slack type of wear.  I really like to go out and eat once a month or so and my favorite place to do that is Applebee's, just a couple miles down the road.
______________________________

Long interlude.  HAD to get out of the house!  Went to a clothing store and bought a couple of nice shirts - I am going to dress up for the flight to Texas, I don't believe in getting on an airplane looking and smelling like a slob.  Went to Great Clips and got a really good haircut :)  Not to mention a really nice hair stylist, lol.  I can talk forever with those people.  Then I get a phone call from home - can you pick up Mountain Dew.  Whatever.  Over to Applebee's, waiting for my ---- nix ----lunch just showed up. I actually come here not only for the food but there is a really cool bartender that I just get along with.   No, nothing there, she's married we just click is all.  I am not getting drunk, either, you can sit at the bar and have dinner without drinking.

Next, stop at the grocery store, pick some stuff up - my refrigerator is empty and my cupboards are getting bare after having a tenant - who asked to help for unknown reasons - and threw out a bunch of stuff out of date.  Which didn't bother me, I will just go get more and get the reserves built back up.

2 weeks to the day til' I head out to Texas.  She doesn't want to text anymore, lol, she just wants to talk on the phone, which is cool excepting where I can't call her and then I want to text her!  We cannot get enough of each other, even after talking on the phone, FB messaging, texting all day long.  I went to bed last night with the sound of her voice in my ears.  The only thing that could possibly be better if she was here with me.

Give it time.  Give it a visit to Texas - though at this point I am not concerned how that is going to turn out.  If it really turned out bad for whatever reason, I would be shockingly surprised.  If you think the talk about a woman in Texas is going to change for any reason, anytime soon, prolly think again, lol.  Her kids found me on FB - she has been trying to keep this from them but one of them looked over her shoulder while we were talking on FB, saw my name, told her older brother who then frantically started looking for me on FB - not hard to find me if you have my name - and then the next thing I knew?

I had an FB message from him.  Lol.  You want to talk about a kid looking for male attention that hasn't had that in his life.  He's asking me questions and then gives me his stamp of approval and then really blew me away - cause' this wasn't a long, extended conversation - we're talking a teenager here with a girlfriend - says: "BTW, I love you!"

That wasn't gay stuff, that's coming from a person who is starving for attention from male attention.  I get that, but it was very surprising to hear that from him. He doesn't even know me and goes from a conversation of what he likes to do to that.

Well, anyway.  I better get out of here, get to the grocery store and get on the phone! Last night's conversation? LOL, 3 hours and 32 seconds!

G'day

ben

Friday, October 18, 2013

Haven't posted anything since Saturday because I have been sick.
I trudged myself into the doc's office on Tuesday to find out that I have
bronchitis.
Longest doc visit I've had in quite some time, because first they wanted me to do
tests to see - whatever, how much air getting down into the lungs - and then after
they determined it was  bronchitis,  breathing treatment, then another test, then
a cocktail of drugs for a prescription.

I am finally, I think, starting to feel better.
This stuff has just zapped my energy and when I am like that, writing in a blog
or doing much of anything else for that matter goes by the way side.

I haven't even been talking to her on the phone until today.
Of course we talk endlessly doing the texting routine or messaging
on facebook - up to 12,000 messages, lol, just on fb alone!

I've also tried to get off work early every day but not working out.
Finally, business is picking up again, just not the greatest week for that
to happen!

Met up with the ex at a mail place today and we sent out a package to our
son.  A bunch of knick knacks and stuff that I got at Walmart plus a book
of stamps so he can write to those that supported him - wanted the stamps, lol,
not coming from a nagging parent wanting him to write! Thou getting an occasional
letter from him would be cool.

Well, it's past midnight, just woke up like I always do, decided to hammer out a few
words here, maybe make me sleepy enough to get back to sleep.

Yes, definitely getting sleep again! It's Friday, one more work day and then I can
spend the weekend doing  much of nothing so I can try and get better!

ben









Saturday, October 12, 2013

I finally started weight training again this week.
The temps have come down enough that there are no more excuses.
What happens when you let a lot of time pass and then start over again?
You can't lift near as much as you used to!
No wonder my chest was getting flabby!
Give it a few months, that should begin to reverse itself.

Actually, you begin to see results relatively quickly, but anything noticeable takes more time than that.

The misses has worse sleeping issues than I do, which is amazing in itself.
She is also a light sleeper, but apparently doesn't embrace the idea of white noise, such as having a fan running or using ear plugs.  Well I am going to start talking her into it.

Anyway, I am going to pay tomorrow for the workout today, I can already tell that!  My chest and arm muscles will probably be sore!

As for today: I really do NOT want to spend 2 more hours walking around handing out flyers today, but the time to leave to go do it is fast approaching and I will have to make up my mind within the next half hour.  Arrrrgh.  Not that there's anything worthy staying home for.......

G'day.

ben

Friday, October 11, 2013

This is all uncharted territory for me.
Regardless, I found my hotel accommodations for cheap in a newer hotel.
I do hope the place isn't a dive, but the pics at least make it look like it's a decent place.
I'll find that out in a little over 3 weeks.
They give extended stay pricing when staying 7 or more days, which brings the price WAY down.

So, it's Friday.
Bonus showed up in my bank account.
As expected, the Federal Government took out a whopping $600 of it.  Pretty good for an entity that is shutting itself down.  It's a bit disappointing to see them take that much out of it, did they work for that money? How did it come about that the Feds get to take a whopping 40% of a bonus that I worked my @$$ off to get?

I want to find out when that particular piece of s*** was instituted, who did it and what excuse they came up with to take that large of a chunk of a person's check.

Weekend is almost here, I only had planned to go out and hand out flyers with the rest of everyone else tomorrow, but if pink eye is still an issue, I won't go.  Yes, I have pink eye and everyone knows it's highly contagious and I don't want to be around other people and their kids and potentially pass it on.  Not sure about that one yet.

I am going to go to a few garage sales and see if I can find a larger suitcase.  I don't travel much anymore and I do not have a large suitcase.  I don't want to spend a small fortune on a piece of luggage that may or may not get much use, who knows.  What I do know is that the small suitcase I have is not large enough for a week's worth of clothing!

Today and by now already started or they are heading that way, is the trucker shut down of the D.C. loop.  It's an interesting idea, but the reality of it is - truckers, stay home for a week.  All of us.  Call in sick, do whatever, just stay home.  Turn off the trucks, that will do more than just get attention.

Whatever, enough.
The lady isn't feeling well this morning, she only got 3 hours of sleep last night, so she's not too talkative, at least this early, lol.

G'day

ben

Wednesday, October 9, 2013

I never understood people that were "hopelessly" lost in love.  Not that I didn't think it was cool, or wonderful, I just couldn't relate.

I am hopelessly lost in a land of love that I have never known before.  I don't even understand it, it is beyond the mind.  Analytic thinking serves no purpose.  I can only think of her. She consumes my mind all day long.  When I wake up at night - which I always do - she is the first thing that comes to my mind. When I wake up in the morning. On the way to work. At work.  When people are talking to me.

I can never remember a time loving anyone like this.  Only when I found the Lord and still love Him, but that is a different love and on a much different level - though greater, yes.  God first.  

She is so beautiful and lovely.  Intelligent and motivated.

I am lost.

Tuesday, October 8, 2013

So, my next-door-neighbor returned yesterday from Michigan.
One of my tenants was out there showing him the video I took of his neighbor on the other side installing the fence parts on the already installed posts that have been sitting there like that for - a couple of years now I think.
I went over and visited with him for quite a while.  I will not go into specifics of that conversation since this blog is not limited to anyone finding it and if that creep that lives next door to him has found it, well, you won't get any information here.  But the conversation eventually steered off of that situation and onto other things, such his property up north of which he has plenty of photos of, pretty remarkable and beautiful place.

Time will tell what will become of the situation with that war and the fence and the stolen property.  Even the Bible, in the Old Testament, has some pretty strong language about neighbors moving property lines and/or attempting to take land from their neighbors.  I'll have to find the specific scripture to refresh my memory.

14 “You must not move the stones that mark your neighbor’s property. People put them there in the past to mark each person’s property. These stones mark the land that the Lord your God gave you.

That's one of the scriptures but not the one I was thinking of.  Maybe look it up later.  

As for the lady, well, we haven't backed off from each other one iota.  It only continues to intensify as the days pass.  But I still have this "guard" up until I meet her in person.  I don't want a huge letdown if that is even possible, but it is possible and anything can happen.  

I am not going to go too far with this entry today, my keyboard is messing up for some reason.  Time to replace it. It stops working, then starts, then stops, gotta get a new one.

G'day.

ben

Sunday, October 6, 2013

Sunday.
We talked via FB messages all day long yesterday.
Excepting the 1-1/2 hour time with my pastor at Smashburger.
I do love Smashburger!!
But I wanted to submit all of this going on to him for prayer and godly counsel.
Because the lady and I are both Christians, we had already set some pretty distinct
boundaries in terms of where conversations can go and such, so everything I told pastor
didn't raise any alarm bells with him.
It was a good meeting and in the end - bypassing a lot of conversation going back and forth -
he said he would discuss with his wife and they would "bathe this in prayer".

That's a good thing.  It's amazing how busy pastors stay all week long!  I think his day off is Monday.

Anyway, pastor asked if we were planning on meeting - encouraging it actually - because you don't really know if 2 people have that spark until they actually meet in person.  So yes, I have purchased the airfare.  I spent days looking around for the cheapest I could find and finally found a flight that goes through Houston instead of Dallas and saves a lot of money in doing so.  Almost 3 hour layover in Houston, though.  Oh well.  Then a short flight to a small airfield one town away from where she lives.  I was going to catch a bus for the rest of the trip but she said she would come get me since it isn't that far away.

I should have bought the insurance, but it forces me to go, lol.  The date for the days off are on the work calendar and so it's a go.  I asked her somewhat pointedly yesterday if she really was ready for me to come out, cause' honey, I'm buying the tickets and there's no turning back after that.

Onto other things.  Such as Safe Driver Award bonus.  I have to make it until January to get it.  That means no tickets, no warnings from ADOT or other police agencies and that also means attempting to make it just short of 3 more months to get it.  Never any guarantees.  I have been eye-balled in the semi numerous times by ADOT officers sitting on the side of the freeways, looking for their next victim.  You see them looking at you and then you start to get nervous.  The thing that might save me is that I am driving a brand new tractor and yes, it looks brand new.  It's clean, it's shiny and it is obviously not 10 years old.  The mal factor in this is that our company has a bad rating in the CSA system so ADOT officers are inclined to pull over any of our trucks that they see.

Well whatever.  I'm not stressing over it.  Haven't been pulled over in the semi in 3 years as of November.

My current dilemma:  I gotta get back into the habit of using cologne!  Ha.  I don't smell bad, take showers every day and all that, don't get me wrong, but I am going to want to put on something that smells good when I go to see her.  I haven't used cologne in so long, I don't even know where to begin!  I, uhhhh, go to a store somewhere I guess that sells it and ask for opinions on what smells good on a man.

I haven't comment on the politics of the day because it's absurd, outrageous and a carnival-like atmosphere, as far as I'm concerned, concerning what's going on in Washington.  The continual blame-shifting game coming from all of them is juvenile at best.  But some of the specific verbiage coming from Reid and his ilk is just unbelievable.  Jihad? Terrorists? Arsonists? Blackmailers? Running around with bombs strapped to their chests? Reid calling them anarchists and monkey-wrenchers and even much more.  The Democratic Senate and Obama and the democrats in the HOR apparently believe that the GOP is somehow constrained and obliged to bow to their demands.  There is a reason that the government is broken up in to 3 branches and there is a reason there are 2 parts to Congress with each part having it's own leadership and who is in control  being totally dependent on what party has the majority.

That's it.  Grow up.  If these people want to go around talking that kind of trash, let them do so from a different position in life because even in politics, that kind of crap talk is completely unacceptable as sitting Senators and Representatives who are allegedly "running" this nation.

And with that, I will end this one cause' I have to take a shower and myself ready for church.

Happy Sunday.

ben

Thursday, October 3, 2013

You didn't think you'd read anything different today, did you?
LOL
It's the same scenario being played out every day now!
Thursday.  Already.  And a lot to do at work this morning, which for me is a really good thing.  We have been so slow.
Finally found out yesterday that yes, indeed, we will be allowed to crank up the speed on the new truck.  About time.  Not only that, but when we have the speed settings changed, I am also going to have the power settings upped. That truck has a sticker on it saying up to 500 horsepower on the engine, there is no WAY that engine's settings are anything close to that.

I am thinking about going up north this weekend, I haven't been up there in a while, but only thinking about it.  I'll be making a trip up there soon enough.

Time to be off to work!

G'day
ben

Wednesday, October 2, 2013

So, we graduated Facebook school and moved on to the first phone call yesterday.
I haven't talked that long with anyone on the planet in at least 10, maybe 15 years.
We were steaming full steam ahead until we got to this issue she has was passive men.
She likes and assertive man and is not into passivity at all.
No-one that knows me would call any portion of my existence to be passive, at all.
But who knows?
She wasn't saying I am passive she was simply telling it like it is as far as her preference.
I - don't know.  I simply do not consider myself  a passive person, I know what she is talking about
and that simply does not describe me, at all.
But, who knows.
Well, I got up late this morning cause I stayed up late talking to her, so, cut this one short.

G'day

ben

Tuesday, October 1, 2013

Going through the complexities in my mind of what it would take to up and haul off, leave Phoenix, Arizona behind and start a life in a different place.
That's called a lot of stuff to do if it gets that far.
So much so, in fact, that I stopped my mind from going there.  House, dogs, ponds, car, job, houseful of stuff to get rid of or just continue to rent out rooms with the older couple in charge - I have started down that road in the thought processes, but had to put the brakes on.

What if this wasn't meant to be?  Lots of questions swirling around in my mind about all of this.  The confirmation from the Lord is what I really seek and until I get that, well, I will let this relationship go where it will, but any plans to actually move there or re-marry will be sitting there, waiting for the arrival of that confirmation.  I don't really know the Lord's will in any of this and that I must know.  Confirmation can come in many forms.  Usually it is more than one "thing" or "event" or words spoken by someone.  I'm praying towards that end.

However, I am still going to pursue this until it either bears fruit - which in the end would be marriage - or the train runs out of diesel and stops in it's tracks.  To that end, I have found some pretty cheap airfare to DFW and then a Greyhound bus for the 3 hour ride or however long it is to her place in eastern Texas, not far from the state line.  In fact, Spirit Airlines runs out of AZA, is probably something like Southwest Airlines in otherwise being known as the cattle carrier airline - herd em' in there and pack em' in like sardines - but it's less than 3 hour flight, I can deal with that to get a $196 round trip ticket!  That's right, 200 bucks round trip to DFW and the Greyhound is $52 round trip as well.  I was knocking my brains out trying to find a cheap flight into her town or one near it, including SHV, and though I found lower priced bookings, nothing in the range that I was looking for.

I truly hate and despise Greyhound buses.  Not because it's a bad busline or something, but because of all the noise and usually kids screaming and making all kinds of noise. But I learned a long time ago how to deal with it - I have taken a LOT of Greyhound bus trips my lifetime: get out the earplugs and go to sleep.  Wake up every 30 to 60 minutes, look around, note that the nightmare continues on, and go back to sleep.  If I don't do that, I tend to start feeling like I am going to go insane.  Heck, some flights I have taken haven't been all that great, either, especially the time sitting next to a man that was somewhere between 350 and 400 pounds.  This was before they started charging extra heavy people 2 seats worth of airfare.  This guy's blubber was all over my left arm and he was also sweating.

It was pretty gross.

Well, I'm going to have to finish this one later, looking up at the clock? It's time to leave for work!

G'day.
ben

Monday, September 30, 2013

I haven't felt like this in decades.
How do you turn this off?
Not that I want to!
We did "20 questions" last night - no sexual questions posed or allowed in this particular set - to "get to know each other better".
This went on, literally, for hours.  In fact, 5 hours had passed and it was all-of-a-sudden time to get ready for bed last night.
I was looking at round-trip airfare to potentially spend a week out there and see if this is really meant to be.  It's one thing to talk over the net, it's another to meet in person and find if there is physical attraction.

The only problem is that I have already taken 2, 1 week off vacations this year.  Not that I "can't" get a third but if I were to spend the $400 to go there and back, I would want a full week off.  Even if the situation turned to, oh well, this wasn't meant to be, we are still friends and have been for a very long time.  I intend on going out there to help her with all the mess that has resulted after her getting divorced.

That is, of course, my only real reservation in this scenario, the divorce is fresh.  But to hear it from her and a friend of her's that has known her for a long time, she has been divorced for 10 years, just the breakup never happened and the papers not signed by the court.  The man apparently has Asperger's syndrome, a thing I have been around in the past.  I can attest to a person with a mostly blank look on their face all the time, completely disconnected to most things and very interested in only a few things.  How that works out in a relationship, well I don't have any personal knowledge of it, but from what she describes, it makes marriage pretty much a living nightmare with no intimacy and in this case, very little connection even with his own kids.

I dunno, but the more we talk the more heated it is getting.  I'm pretty sure I'm ready for this, it's been 8 years.  I have had this thought in the back of my mind that if I find the right person, I will move out of town if that's what it takes to be with that person.  That would have to be the scenario in this case.  But, we haven't quite gotten that far yet.  This whole thing started out when she confided in me she was getting divorced - she didn't want anyone to know about it for whatever reason and then we started discussing what, exactly, was going on and the toll the situation has been taking on her for quite a long time now.  I started praying for her, her kids and even the man in question.

Anyway, it's sort of a giddy feeling.  Like being a teenager in love for the first time or something.  Hard to explain.  I sit and wonder if this could actually happen.  I would be taking on a role that includes 9 children - though one of them is in the military.  Some of the kids head's are messed up because of the lack of connection with their father.  Or really, the father's lack of showing any love or involvement in their lives.  She was telling me last night that the young ones have been asking her to find them a real daddy.  That's a pretty stark and telling statement coming from kids under the age of 10.  You really wouldn't expect to hear that and apparently they don't miss him at all. He begrudgingly takes them for an after noon on weekends, but not all of them.  I don't know and didn't ask if they really wanted to go with him or not.

It's kind of a messed-up situation, actually, but still.

Time to be off to work.

G'day.

ben

Saturday, September 28, 2013

Okay.
Well, last night and again, no sounds from the partying neighbors.  A good thing - yes.

I woke up this morning early - before 5am.  I try not to do that on weekends and if I do, I usually try to get back to sleep for at least another hour and do my version of sleeping in.  Alas, that wasn't to be.  I got up, got coffee, got on the computer and contemplated the morning's musings.

Most notably, going to church, praying for a few minutes and then going out and handing out flyers in the neighborhood.  I thought of reasons I could give as excuses to not go, who wants to do THAT on a Saturday?  I came to the conclusion: ME.  So after looking at all the rubbish in the news - Obamacare this and that - I am keeping up with all of that but it's getting pretty old at this point, wearing on the nerves - I got in my car, drove to church and there it was.

I have to say that I ended up in a group with older people in it.  Not surprising.  But everyone detracted from the "base", we all just went 2 by 2 and got the work done.  We didn't pound on doors, we just left flyers.  If a house said "No Solicitors", I respected their wishes and didn't even leave the flyer (though I suspect much of that aimed at people banging on doors). I don't like people coming and trying to sell stuff, either, though I am always polite to them.  I politely tell them I am not interested, have a great day, goodbye.  If I just leave a flyer, well, no biggies.  I get them on my gate all the time.  I read them, 99% of it I am not interested in and throw in the trash can, but it's not like I get mad that they left the flyer there.

I ended up with a very spiritually minded woman, she is the type of person that a church really needs.  Very  much attuned to the Spirit and part of everything that goes on. She is 15 years older than me but kept up with it. She wanted to get the job done and so did I, get the flyers out and get it done.  So we did.  Covered a lot of territory/streets, talked about spiritual things and then that was it, headed back to the church. I'm just saying that I like her as a person, it was cool to be able to go up and down streets with someone I respect and admire in terms of her relationship with the Lord and her openness to the heavens.  If you don't understand that and want clarification, I am happily wiling to give it, but for the carnal minded, it has absolutely nothing to do with sex.

But along the lines of the opposite sex, oh yes, I have been talking with someone.  And it is turning - serious.  I am already planning a trip to Texas, if that gives you any clue.  The full details I won't go into, I don't know yet if we are really going anywhere with this but the conversations have become much more intense and the frankness of feelings also going that direction.  I'm at the age where I am not going to pass up a good woman if one comes along.  I will jump all over it if I feel inclined to and in this case, I definitely feel inclined!  I knew her (not in the "biblical" sense, lol) from the mission field.  I was attracted to her then but I was too busy with missionary work. I put those kinds of thoughts and feelings as much as I could on the shelf in the mind.

It all started out when I posted something on my FB wall about how I was open to anyone and that I don't care what religion you are and this that and the other thing, the exact verbiage I don't remember. She PM'ed me not long after that and confided to me some things that were going on in her life that she didn't want to talk about publicly  I prayed with her and have been talking with her ever sense, trying to build her up - she has been totally torn down by her now-ex husband and view of herself has degraded along with it.  But both outwardly and inwardly, she is a very beautiful woman.  I could easily fall in love with her.  She has 9 kids and though that's a lot, I could learn to deal with that as well.

If we really clicked, then yes, I would have to move to a place in eastern Texas, that wouldn't bother me excepting being away from my mom.  But I don't want to get too far into this discussion here, this is only something in the most preliminary of stages. At the same time, the conversations are going deeper, much more so than just normal conversation with a person.  I feel the spark : ) If it leads to a dead end, it won't bother me that much, I am seeking a lady, have been for a while now, just looking for the right person.

What scares me in life?  The thought of growing old - alone.  No thanks.

Long interlude.  Took a nap.  Between going to bed late last night, getting up early this morning, this morning's activities and then keeping busy with stuff around the house today - well, nap time was calling, lol.  The only problem with nap time is if it comes too late in the day!  Oh well, don't have to go to work in the morning - if that's going to be an issue.

Wow! All I can say about current conversation with above-mentioned lady.

G'nite.

:)

ben

Thursday, September 26, 2013

So, while the company was bashing me almost 3 years ago now for getting pulled over twice in the same month, nothing is said to 2 drivers at the main branch who have racked up a LOT of points against the company this year in tickets and warnings.  This is the new method that the FMCSA is using to track down companies with fleets of trucks that are considering a threat to public safety if enough drivers tally up too many points.

Points are received for tickets AND warnings.  In the old days, warnings counted nothing against the driver or the company.  A warning is warning, don't do it again, or in the case of what I received, fix-it tickets.  Mine was a strap that had a nick in it - but the pallet it was covering I had thrown another strap onto it so it was legal.  I received a warning for following too closely but after questioning the officer about where, exactly, this alleged incident had happened, I was going less than 10 MPH and when I questioned him on my speed, he threw up his hands and said he didn't know how fast I was going.  That was one stop.  The other stop was where I was going 70 in a 55 mph zone and not having enough straps on a bundle of pipe.  However, when I passed the officer, I looked down and noted I was going 68mph.  Mostly, going 3MPH over the limit isn't going to get you a ticket.  It was a construction zone, was supposed to be marked at 55MPH, but it wasn't, the officer assumed it was and wrote me a warning for it anyway.  I went back later and saw the stands where the speed limit was supposed to be posted, but there were no signs there.

The pipe was 20 feet long.  I had 4 straps over it.  The officer asked how long the pipe is, I said 20 feet.  He measured it, it was 20 feet and 7 inches, so I get a warning for not having the extra strap since it was over 20 feet.  This is how they treat us out there, like dirt.  I'm quite serious, highway patrol officers and municipal commercial enforcement officers and around these parts: ADOT Enforcement officers treat truck drivers like we are a bunch of dumb, stupid morons and they try to find as much wrong with a truck as they can.

I have gone WELL out of my way to avoid known traps, places where they have set up mobile inspection stations.  Now I find out one of the rest areas out south of Phoenix has had a scale installed and they apparently are going to start using it to weigh trucks and do inspections.  I will be avoiding the stretch of roadway like the plague.  The only way to beat them at their own game is to find out where they are at in advance and go around no matter how far out of the way it takes you.  That and try to avoid known locations where they set up portable scales and do inspections.  I don't care about the scales, I am never over-weight, it's the inspections that are the killers.

Well, anyway, our company has so many points against it, it's trucks are targeted for inspections.  That's the jist of it.  I have driven by numerous ADOT and other officers recently - you can't avoid all of them, they are everywhere - and saw them eyeing the truck.  Obviously, at least to me, contemplating pulling me over (they don't need a reason, it's implied consent all over the US if you are driving a commercial vehicle).  I think the only thing that saves me is that I am driving a brand new truck and I have been keeping it very clean to make it continue to look brand new.  Sure, they could pull me over but I have been lucky so far that they haven't.  If I can make it another 3 months and a week or so without getting pulled over and getting warnings, I will get another 2 week's pay for the Safe Driver Award.

No guarantees there as evidenced by our drivers downtown, neither of which will get that award. |The company disqualifies you for any warnings - doesn't have to be a ticket.  You are also disqualified if you get a ticket while driving your own, personal vehicle.

Because of the vast amount of regulation that are imposed against trucks and their drivers, the trucking business is a tough business to be in right now or be a commercial driver.  And when you get points against you - one driver got a total of 29 points, which is a lot, for one time being pulled over - companies are getting upset because it also counts against them.  It is, frankly, a stupid rule, one of many the FMCSA has put out that are senseless, don't help the industry and cause the industry to incur even more setbacks and more financial output.

Frankly, I drive the pickup truck as often as I can if everything will fit into it instead of hopping into the semi, which reduces the number of miles I have to be on the road in the big truck.  I am really going to be interested to see how many trucks show up in DC next month, the 11th through the 13th, they are going to attempt to shut DC down.

Well whatever.  It's Thursday, getting close to the end of the week now.  Temps outside are dropping considerably overnight but still warming up - too much - during the day.   The new worker is now not liking me - which I really don't care about - because I mostly ignore him.  He has an attitude and he has a quick-trigger temper.  Which is why I ignore him. I don't talk to him unless I have to about something going on, the rest of the time I zip it and just keep to myself or talk with the manager.  The new worker gets these glares and stares going and I just don't even validate it.  He is a lazy @$$ who has no concept of a work ethic and has no problem sitting around on company time doing nothing and surfing the internet.  If there was truly nothing to do, then I could see it, but there is ALWAYS a cleaning project to do.

Whatever again.  Off to work.

G'day.

ben





Tuesday, September 24, 2013

The weekend noise-makers behind me the next street over?  Have quit.  I dunno why, but ever since the 3rd visit to their house in the same night by Phoenix police a couple of weeks ago, there hasn't been a peep from them.  

Ummm, so I have been talking with a lady that I have known since the mission field.  No great details going on here, but some intense conversations about things going on with her kids - really not so great things - and her divorce situation.  But also some very pleasant conversations.  

I don't want to go on with that too much, it may lead nowhere but at the very least, we have been connecting on FB for a while now and talking.

I'm tired of being single, lol.

I was going to write up a "full" entry but it's my bedtime, so I bed you a good night : )

ben

 Thursday - mid afternoon Yup, I haven't posted in several days. I've actually written some but I never posted the stuff.  Just neve...