Well, as the days pass, so the information also comes rolling in.
They relieved that temp driver of his duties today.  However, they told him I am probably going to quit so they may be calling him back.  Now, it's not surprising that they know I have been applying elsewhere for jobs - they have been calling and calling for verification of employment.  However, those calls are going to corporate, not the local management.  Not that I didn't believe that corporate wouldn't come along and tell them what I am doing.  I knew this before I started this process.

However.  I didn't expect management to tell a non-management person that information.  I think that's unprofessional if nothing else.  I have been intentionally keeping a very good attitude and keeping my work ethic up, doing what I have been doing all along.  At least I'm not giving them any "good" reason to get rid of me.  They could release me at any time which is fine, I can be in an orientation as early as this coming Monday if that happened.

Regardless, I did tell the GM today in email that I still wanted to stay at this company, that I could get along with the new manager if his demeanor remained "mostly" at what it is now and that I await his decision.  I am carefully wording everything I say and leaving nothing to subjective interpretation. Well, people can subjectively interpret whatever they want, but I am carefully thinking through what i say to anyone and keeping my conversations at a minimum.

Whatever the case, I'm going to bite my tongue and wait for the GM's decision.  It is at least possible he could make a favorable decision.  I don't know but I won't wait forever.  I have made up my mind and the gears are turning.  I have 2 companies now that I have narrowed it down to and when I am pressed to make a final decision, it will come to me which one to take. I have no idea if Addler will take to being in a truck but I wanted the option open and at least try it if it comes to that.  They offered without my asking - I wouldn't ask them to do that really - to take care of him while I am gone but that means I would only see him 4 days out of the month and I do not think that would work.

He is very attached to me now.  Very attached.  It would be a tragedy in my mind to have to give him up to yet another owner/family after going through 2 already in his relatively short period of time he has been alive on this earth.  In fact, I would contact the original owners and see if they would take him back.  The lady loved him dearly and she was devastated to have to let him go - as I would be.  It will be a matter of whether he takes to a truck life or not.

It is unfortunate but I do have to think through all of this and be prepared for what may come.  To be honest, I have had thoughts of asking my oldest brother - of whom I have no relationship with - if he could get me into Boeing.  I have no qualifications so that would be a longshot even if he agreed to try.  I've also had thoughts that if I do go OTR, to spend my free time doing online education.  But in reality, I am 52 years old and it is difficult for people over the age of 50 to get into much of anything without ample experience in any given field.  I can make excellent money OTR I just know that it is a sacrifice.

I've called the waterworks company within 100 miles and no-one is hiring.  For any position, not just trucking.  It's serious hard times out here with the oil fields being shut down.

Well, I can take solace that at least I have something to turn to even if it isn't optimal.

As I posted the other day, I wasn't going to wait around to hear back from the general manager. I went ahead and emailed him from my company email account today to ask him about the pay raise. It was worded with respect and professionalism, I have not yet determined to burn my bridges with this company.

I got a reply email from him within a few minutes actually. He stated that he had just gotten back from Dallas and needed to make a phone call to my new manager and that he would try to make a decision by mid week.i'm not holding my breath but you know it was worth a try anyway.

Eddie, the Driver that was fired for failing a drug test, started today. From the perspective of trying to get a pay raise that is really good news at all.if I were to quit today they would just pick up with them where I left off. Of course he is a pothead and who knows whether he has been able to give that up or not. He was using a coworker's urine drug test in the past. One would presume that the company would force him to do regular from, but this company doesn't seem to be normal in that aspect.

Regardless I am starting to warm up to the idea of being in a truck for extended periods of time. It would be tough to face two weeks at a time out on the road with a dreadful outlook up on it. There are plenty of cons with OTR driving but there are some pros to it as well. 

Unfortunately I would not be at all surprised if they came back with nothing. My current company that is. But I still think an ounce of faith that there is a remote possibility that they might agree to enough of  a pay raise to keep me there. 

Meanwhile the time draws nigh for me to go to one of the orientations. So I am going to look up the things that they have made for truck drivers make their life easier while they're driving on the road. One nice thing that many trucking companies have nowadays is electronic logging. No more logbooks, you just input the information into a device which is sent back to your company and kept on file. It warned you when you're getting close to the end of your allowable driving hours. I only know this because I asked a driver into our yard last week about it. He showed me the device showed how it works.

I have stopped putting out applications for jobs. The only ones that I wouldn't lie for now our local jobs and I have done all of those that I could find. There were some great jobs that are local but they are in my area. I do not believe that I want to relocate again unless it's completely out of this entire area.

The other driver texted me to day and stated:"I don't think we are getting a raise so, I'm leaving! F*** LUSCO!  Now Eddie going to be getting all the deliveries."

Eddie is the driver that was fired a year ago or more for testing positive for THC.  The truck driver who was driving trucks - as high as a kite.  How do you like that idea?  Truck drivers operating 80,000 pounds worth of machinery that are totally impaired in their judgement and thinking.  Yup.  Talk about a company setting itself up for a fall.  He is also a true bulls****er and talks out of both sides of his mouth.  I am not exactly happy he is coming back and I question the judgement of a company as big as this one is in allowing this person back. 

For him to get that job back, he would have to be kissing the new manager's @$$.  The other driver's statement about Eddie getting all the deliveries is simply a statement about Eddie getting all the good runs - which is desirable over having to stay at the yard.   In reality, I get a lot of the good deliveries as well.  But I get dumped into the other driver's truck and he ends up in either the PU or the 550.  Monday I am taking a trip to Mississippi and that is an all day event.  

The other driver is pisssed. I was upset at first but now I'm just biding my time.  Monday I will call the GM and ask if he can give me a raise or not.  I won't wait.  Well, I: can appear like I'm waiting, orientaation for the company I have chosen start date on the 11th.  I'm going to "try" to take all my floating holiday days off - 3 days worth.  If I quit, I get my earned vacation hours but all the rest of it just goes away.  

_____________________________

Another entry written in segments.  Got busy attempting to finish up the Polaris.  Seems to be working fine, I just have to put body parts back on it now.  I had new tires sitting out there for it - 2 of them anyway - was time to finish this up. Money already spent, ramps to get the thing up on a pickup truck.  I'm not really going to be spending money like that at this point on much of anything until I get my job situation worked out.  This area is dried up of local jobs that pay anything, I would have to move to Dallas to get something decent.  

No, I don't want to live in Dallas.  I do know several people there, though, but it's just another big city like Phoenix, the traffic is horrible among other things and it's nothing I want to get involved with.  I have been sending out a few more applications but it's become obvious there is nothing local.  I have tried and asked around.  A company that has LTL told me they have too many drivers and basically, that is the situation everywhere - at least out here  because of the oilfield dump.  I didn't sign up for this. I have been trying to get my mind to accept the idea of OTR and it's been difficult.  It is not the easiest life in the world, but most people don't understand that.  You don't go home every night, you have to spend 10 hours a day driving and then after that all the other stuff such as eating, refueling, laundry, finding a place to park for the night, etc etc etc. 

I can tell right now that 2 days home after being out for 14 is going to seem like nothing.  Maybe my world needs shaken up a bit, I don't know. There is another way to look at OTR - you get to see a lot of places that most people would never be able to visit in one lifetime.  Is the glass half empty or half full proposition.  One thing for certain, my dog is content to be with me - alllll day long.  At the same time, he has friends out back and they play a lot.  He would miss that, I'm sure.  I really don't know which he would "like" more - staying here without me or going with me and not having the freedom of a back yard to roam around.  

Meanwhile, my landlord's freinds that moved back here late last year - are broke.  Which isn't anything shocking in this world but, they inherited a 100k and blew it.  Literally blew it.  It sounds like a lot of money but if you're not working and you are paying all your expenses out of it, yeah.  They bough a pickup truck and the grand total after all the money they dumped into it is 20k.  That's a 1/5th of that money right there.  I'm not judging them, I actually feel sorry for them. They are young, he is out of the military and has severe PTSD.  They just didn't think into the future.  They also didn't try to find jobs.  

Me? That money gets invested or start my own business if I could find something I both enjoy and there is a market for.  To sit around blowing 100k is just unfathomable to me.  I figured this out quickly when they came over the other day and stated to not tell them where the truck is. I don't know where the truck is, but why?  They took out a title loan on it. Title and payday loans are the worst loans on earth, period.  But it was almost shocking.  I didn't say anything about the inheritance, but my landlady did after I engaged that conversation.  What happened to you all of your money?  "It's tied up". 

But I watched them.  Buying extremely expensive liquor - like one bottle at $100 type.  Expensive cigars.  The truck.  A - temporary - lavish lifestyle.  I've seen  this too many times.  I eventually have an inheritance coming - hopefully not anytime soon - and I can tell you that my portion of it will be well more than that.  I have no intentions of just blowing it if it ever comes.  Perhaps I'll die first - though I wouldn't wish that on my mother, being a parent I understand you would much rather die off before die off first before your children.  

Anyway, just watching people going through such things.  Yes the brought it on themselves, yes, they should have had some foresight.  But still.  I mean, at least buy a house/property with it? Out here you can buy a house for less than 100k.  I'm not saying anything fancy, but you would own the property and only be left paying property taxes and insurance.  In fact, there is quite the lack of rentals out here and people needing such. There is a college a mile away and another college 2 miles away and yet another college about 4 miles away. There is a market here for room rentals.  

Apparently, Louisiana has specific anti-bullying laws and apparently, there is some grounds for filing a suit against the company for knowingly installing an "asshole" - the gm told me that yesterday - into a managerial position that has a known history of violence and putting him over employees he openly dislikes - though he has no real reason to since we don't even know the man.  If there is an validity to what I have found online, I have witnesses including one from outside the company.  It would be interesting to see something such as "intentional infliction of emotional distress" as it is called.  Certainly have been exposed to that from that dude from day one, but now as a manager?  Unbelievable that there are trolls walking around this planet that actually think talking to people like this, especially in a managerial position, is somehow okay.

I actually wasn't thinking anything about bullying and lawsuits.  I just know I don't want to work for an a-hole - even HIS manager calls him that behind his back. Oops!  But, my co-worker called me today and we talked for an hour or so. I - kinda - get him to thinking about things.  He's young. He's not stupid but he doesn't go to the places I go in the thinking department.  Not saying I'm Einstein, just I tend to spend a lot of time analyzing things that are affecting me and going down every potential trail of outcomes that may occur.  It's everything from the worst to the best outcomes.

Monday should be - interesting.  I'm transferring photos to my desktop computer so I can empty my phone of all the memory eating pics and videoes.  I intend on getting recordings of any interaction between him and I from this point forth if I can get the phone going nonchalantly.  I really do want to catch this stuff on a recording.  Yeah, I do. Because it's not going to stop.  It may slow down, he may hide it for awhile after the gm gets on his case, which by now he already has, but this dude really needs some counseling.  That's my best answer to people that cannot get a hold of their emotions.  It's not a jab, either, it does work if the person is open to the counselor's input.

I don't have much faith that the gm is actually going to do anything about my pay.  He has no choice but to deal with the new manager.

I have been searching intently for local jobs and it just isn't there. The laid off oil field drivers have flooded the local market and the only thing that will change that is if oil field driving jobs come back.  They apparently pay quite well but I bet none of them expected their jobs would ever be subject to the idea of a oil crash, if you will.  The prices will eventually go back up and perhaps those jobs will come back and perhaps they will take those jobs back, don't know.  The only local jobs I have found are very low paying crap that doesn't pay on the level of an experienced CDL driver.  I have also been looking for forklift jobs, but those don't pay enough money either.

___________________________________

Well here it is Sunday evening.  Tomorrow should be interesting to say the least.  I don't see the man as having the ability to fire me, not after the way the gm was talking, but who knows.  This conversation with him, if it takes place, will likely be edgy.  I do not fear the man and I refuse to fall into that trap - that is what is going on at that branch, he's got people in fear for their jobs.  I don't get it but whatever. I'll go in with an open mind just in case there is any hope but with two, separate and extreme issues - him and pay - it is unlikely that one or the other or both will be rectified.

Well then.

That rather lengthy email sent to the general manager turned into chaos.  

But I expected it.  Again, I have numerous job offers, to get fired from my current employer would not mean sent to the welfare services or the unemployment line.  I had to have that to back me up before going down this road.  The assurace in my mind that if they were to play the firing card, I would be able to smile, speak my mind and get up and walk away from it without fretting. Pick it right up where I left off, get into a truck and drive - and make a helluva lot more money.  The reason I have continued to work for less money on a local basis is simply because of the element of being able to go home, each and every day, sleep in my own bed, have my own rather larger bedroom with private bathrooom.

There is value in that and it can and in my case, does account for lower pay.  I wasn't broke, wasn't rich, just somewhere in the middle.  

I saw my new manager this morning and he was just staring at me.  Driving back in the yard he was out there again, staring. Glaring? I don't know.  I thought he had been informed of my email and that was his retribution.  They guy is a piecce of work.  Well, anyway, I went on another run at noon - it was time to go home according to my 40 hour work week.  A freight truck had come into the yard, however and had material that a contractor needed "right now" and I was the only driver there, the other two were on the road.  I wanted to go home.  To hell with this company's 40 hour stringency, I'll give it to them. Take off when I hit 40 hours and had that one nailed.  

I get out on that run and the other driver is texting me that the GM called him. WTH. I start all this stuff and this GM is contacting everyone but me.  I get it though.  He's trying to verify my story.  Was I accurately and truthfully retelling it or was I making up a bunch of hot air and selling it off with an odor of hogwash?  Still, was he going to call me at all?  He said he would.  Well, I got that text from the other driver while driving home - I got off later than I should have but I still left early, in fact, right now it's time for everyone to go home over there - and then I got the call from the GM.I recognized the area code and got myself instantly in to the right mind frame.  

It was a 50 minute phone call.  I spoke my mind - quite freely I might add, I'm on my way out in my thinking though I didn't tell him that. I didn't tell him that because I wondered if there was any glimmer of hope here? Would he tell me that he sides with the manager or would he tell me his actions were horrid and needed to be corrected? I don't like burning the bridges unless it is totally warrannted.  I was treated pretty well in Phoenix - same company different mindset so why pour fuel on this and throw the match?  The latter ended up being true. He emphatically stated that that was absolutley not way that he wants employees to be treated.  

But we went back and forth on both issues: the manager and pay.  I was brought out here with the promise of 50 hours.  I was quite sure on this one.  I asked numerous times.  I wanted it a settled deal.  But, in typical managerial style, they said no, that isn't what happened. Oh, YES, it is how it happened.  You think I'm going to kill myself by coming out here and not know every detail, especially pay?  I knew where he was going to go with it: slow time of year. You'll get more hours at other times of the year. Great, but what about now? Pay?  Forget the hours, let's talk about pay?  Too much detail to go into, but he said well what about when we get busy? And you're making that kind of pay?  I can't justify that to the company.  Now that I'm thinking about it and not in a very intense, back and forth conversation, so what? It would make up for these times of the year when the contracts slow down and incoming money slows down with it.  He was talking about a balancing act I just didn't think about that portion of it.

You can talk a lot of words in 50 minutes. And we did.  This dude seems to have his head on straight.  But when it comes to pay, he talks the coroporate jargon and I talk the pay jargon. The 2 clash.  I kept going back to my pay in Phoenix, who cares about OT?  I didn't even think about OT when I started with that company, I thought: PAY. How much am I going to get PAID?  He then tried to tell me that the market in Louisiana only pays the amount I am getting paid.  I replied that I have talked with a large number of local drivers coming into our yard. Southeastern starts out experienced drivers at anywhere between 20 and 24 bucks and hour.  I've talked to other drivers making anywhere between 18.50 to 27.

I then told him I could easily go out and find a job paying 60k per year.  I would be out on the road all the time, but I would be making good money.  Not only did not try to argue with that, he knows all about it because they have trouble getting and keeping drivers at other locations in that state. Exactly, who wants to work for peanuts?  But isn't there value in being able to go home every day? he asks.  Yes, there is, but at the same time I need to be able to pay my bills and beyond that.  My life isn't just about going to work and then coming home and then spending weekends waiting to go to work on Monday morning.....

Well, he told me that letter I wrote him kept him awake last night, but immediately conceded that I probably haven't been sleeping to well, either. Umm, yeah?  Seriously.  This conversation ended with him telling me that he would run the numbers past corporate once again and try to do something and asked if I could speak with the manager alone or would he have to be there?  See, this is where this situation has failed.  This new manager thinks he can do or say anything he wants because there isn't anyone else there to hold him accountable.  The workers under him are afraid to say anything. I'm the rogue wave in that mix, I refuse to be treated like s*** by an etotistical, self-centered, self-absorbed person who also has the title of manager.  I'll quit before I just  sit around and tolerate that kind of abuse.  I simply told the gm that yes, I can talk to him but....it's a two way street.  He understood that immediately and said the new manager was his next phone call and that he hadn't shared with the new manager or anyone else for that matter the email I had sent him and also promised that he would ensure - I didn't ask for this but I'm glad he offered it - that the new manager would not be allowed to take some kind of "revenge" on me by using his position in an unprofessional manner to retaliate. He also offered that he, too, has an open door policy and I can pick up the phone and call him at any time.

Well that's a first.  From the way everyone talks at the branch, you have to go through your manager to talk to the gm.  Which is a load of bs, expecially in this situation with an egomaniac running a branch that wants everyone to fear him and bow down and worship.  You think I"m exaggerating.  If I could only have gotten a video of him when he went off into his tirade on Monday morning.

It's now the weekend, I started this entry yesterday but got caught up in applying for more jobs - the job search hasn't ended and likely won't.  I have no faith that the gm is actually going to give me any kind of raise, much less a substantial one.  I could probably exist off the current pay if I did nothing but go to work and buy groceries and pay already existent bills.

This is going to be an on-going dilemmma until I have it resolved one way or another.  

Saw my paycheck under the new "regime" and decide to fire off a final appeal to the general manaager.  You can't see him in person - unless you want to drive 4 plus hours to get there and it simply isn't worth that kind of a drive to get a no answer.  

But, I wasn't going to leave this company without caling out the new manager and his foul behavior, especially what happened Monday morning AND having a contractor who has nothing to do with the situation seeing it and making comments about the man's demeanor.  So, I wrote the GM a letter on the company mail system. First, my pay.  I could probably deal with this lame manager if my pay was good, but I certainly am not going to tolerate his garbage at substandard wages.  I brought up the fact that my pay is now the same as an entry level truck driver who has no experience and is fresh out of driving school.

That is no exaggeration, either, that is exactly what my pay has been scaled back to.  Somehow, overnight, my work is wortth a thousand dollars less per month than it was the month before?  lol There are numerous reasons I don't like OTR driving, one of them is that you have force yourself to get exercise, for you aren't getting any just sitting there behind the wheel 10 hours a day.  At a work environment such as what I am at now, I get all kinds of exercise whether I want to or not, it's an aspect I actually like about the job.  The second of course is not going home to your own bed every night, but I can deal with that.  Other things. Time management becomes a big issue.  You have to figure out a "rhythm" so to speak and get into the flow of it.  It takes a while to figure that out.  I've been out of the OTR stuff for so long it would be like startinga ll over again.  

Though, there are plenty of trucking boards online that I intend on visiting if/when I pull the trigger, which I suspect will occur quickly now that I have written that letter.  After writing that message I didn't expect to actually even hear back from the man, but I just accessed my company email account and found a message.  He said he would call me tomorrow - which is today - and we could discuss it for he didnt wan to "frustrate" me, he said, with email that might be misinterpreted.  

Whatecver the case, I must be off to work.  Today should be interesting, for I am guessing my email will be forwarded to the new manager.  

This new manager stated at the first meeting that he was likely going to be spending the rest of his career - another 6 or 7 years he declared - as manager of the branch.
There is one thing that I can testify as quite certain: at the money I am making, I will not be working for this individual for the rest of my career. The only thing that would make me want to stick around is decent money and without my newly eliminated OT hours?  It is a done deal. I am going to take whatever the best offer I can get that includes me taking my dog with me.  It is a sticking point for me but for me, it's worth it.  I will have a companion with me that has grown to be very much like a Great Dane: following me everywhere I go, wanting to be with me alllllll the time. Leaving him here - my landlords graciously offered to take care of him if it comes to that - would really be very disheartening for me and I just don't feel I could deal with it.  Money isn't everything.

I was at a jobsite today up north and the contractor started right in on the man.  What was up his @$$ the other day? I heard him calling you guys childish and basically stating you are all a bunch of idiots?  What? You heard all of that?  I didn't even know he had been standing behind us.  I was too busy attempting to quelch my internal desire to tell him where he can shove his bs.  Yup, he said, I heard all of it.

I actually have a person as a witness to this "manager's" crap that has no personal involvement at all with this and  I didn't start that conversation, he brought it right up.  I wasn't shocked by his assessment of that man and I felt at least justified in my decision to vacate my position at that company and find greener - and more peaceful - pastures somewhere else.  Now, I can't say that I will love my next job.  I am doing some research on both companies in contention but in the end, you never know until you are working for them and see how you are treated.

Regardless, I received a text message out of the blue from a recuiter for yet another company.  I put my name and info on a site that farms it out to - all kinds - of companies.  They just forward it everywhere. I knew that before I signed up for it.  I've received text messages, phone calls and emails from just about every major trucking company in North America and also from some lessor known ones, including the company that texted me this morning.  My first question: Do you have a pet policy? That's what they call them - learned that in just the first hours of my first searching for a new job.  Yes, tell me about your dog.  Well, he's big, lol.  He's fully house-trained, he's non-destructive and he's definitely not vicious nor would be considered a vicious breed.

How big?  Yeah, he's 130 pounds now, lol.  Funny how a dog that big can roll up into a ball that small yet stretch out entirely and take up an entire bed!  These trucks come with bunk beds. He would have his own bed to sleep on.  The dude says that's fine.  Second question: what's the starting pay?  40 cents per mile.  What's the average mileage per week? Around 3,000. Okay, money's good.  Even if the miles aren't that much, I'm good.  I have a disadvantage that I didn't understand I would have going into this: most of these company do not accept local driving as acceptable.  You have to go out with a trainer for anywhere from 50 hours to 4 weeks to get "certified" to drive with them. They pay during that time equals out to minimum wage.

I'm in a learning curve here.  I had no idea how much the trucking industry had internally changed.  I knew how much the regulations have changed affecting all drivers, I keep up on that but I had no interest until this management change at work to keep up with what trucking companies want and the rules they are playing by.  Today's call was a much better looking company than many of them that I have been looking at.  They have a home every weekend option.  I don't know if that materially affects your pay, though. I want at least a grand a week to start.  We won't get into the conversation until Monday.  That's when the recuiter said he would be back and would give me a call.  I am getting my memory back on OTR driving - what is good, what is not and what questions definitely need to be answered.

I'm still looking local and will still look local even if I have to get on the road.  My main objection at work is the pay reduction.  If that hadn't happened, I would be struggling working for this dude but I would probably maintain myself and just go with the flow.  I've been exposed to dictator type managers before, but they at least had some sense of giving their workers the idea that they are valued by the company and an occasional good job. But, this dude here? Has everyone on edge.  He maintains an atmosphere of rigidity and likes to keep everyone on edge, in fear and in question of their jobs, actually.  He can't just go firing everyone.  But, I'm sure he could fire one or two and get away with it and right now, they are going to bring back the driver that was fired for haivng THC in his system. For me, that gives him the option of getting rid of me and no matter how much I have tried, he obviously doesn't like me.

At this point, I don't try and I don't care.  I don't say hi to him anymore, I have given up on it.  I remain respectful outwardly even though he absolutely doesn't deserve my respect.  I am only doing that because a gap in work history is not good for your job record.  I truly wish I could find something else to do with my life but short of going to school and going broke while doing it, or perhaps some divine intervention and an opportunity out of the blue - I never discount that possibility - I either have to do what I know what makes money or - go broke and live under a tree.  Hey, I have a trailer up on my mom's property in northern Arizona! lol I actually considered that.  Trucking companies don't CARE where you live, take the truck home with you!  Drop the trailer down the road, drive the tractor up there, walaah.  Pay her some rent to make her happy and upkeep the property and there you go. Live up in the beautiful mountains in cooler temps.  Cept' that trailer.  I like it but to live in it?  I could do it I guess just need a few upgrades.

I pretty much go through all the rabbit trails when I am faced with whatever.

Right now my rabbit trrails are truck parking. I have read about it for years.  I figured out that OTR drivers may happen to find palces off the beaten path - but not too far off the main trail - that you won't just happen to find.  They are right off the Interstate usually but you would never they are there unless you knew the area.  I could name 30 places at least in Louisiana off of I-20 and I-49 that OTR drivers wouldn't know about unless - they talked to a local or just happened to get off that exit.  It's a market that needs filled.  I have ideas.  I looked at a few that listed their truck stops for Louisiana and included none of the ones I know about that aren't brand name truck stops.

I'm going to test it out by posting some stops on this blog with an appropriate title and see how many hits it gets.

Anyway, bedtime.

Not much time to write an entry but figured to get this little gem in here.  Showed up for work yesterday at 7am, so did the other driver. The other driver was supposed to show up at 8, so I asked him why he was there.  Bewildered look on his face - but he's a good actor.  He knew he was supposed to show at 8, he's tryig to push the issue that he should be able to come in early and leave early.......okay, whatever.

Anyway, shortly after, the manager shows up, sees both of us there and flips out.  Literally loses it.  Why are you both here? The other driver  started trying to explain away ...... this isn't that hard. Even children could get this.  You are acting childess - addressing both of us - how difficult is this? This isn't that hard - he went on and on and on, angry, belittling us and speaking in harsh tones.

I forced myself to keep my mouth shut, for I wanted to tell him where to stick it and just quit, right there and go home.  If I make it til' next month I"ll have about 90 hours of vacation time and I will get paid for those hours at regular time but still, it's like a whole nother paycheck.  Which will help when I quit.

But, the plain simple truth of the matter is: this dude is not management material. I was afraid of that before they promoted him and I spoke my mind about it to upper management.  So did numerous other people.  He may know the nuts and bolts of the workings of the branch, but he has no knowledge of how to effectively communicate with people, he doesn't care about the people working for him and he is a ticking time bomb.  He will lose it sooner or later and by that, I mean, lose it to the point of going back to his old ways of threatening people - with violence.

And the reality of it is, he just implement this new "policy" of his.  It's not like we've been doing this for 6 months and we should know and have it down.  To lost it like that over something so petty only points to his inaability to keep his emotions in check.  Now, if I were getting paid $25 per hour I wouldn't care, just put up with it and la deee dahhh.  But I am not and the money ain't talking to me at all.

I stopped applying for a day or so just to take a break from it.  I've had several job offers but so far, none of them will allow a dog the size of Addler in the truck.  60 pounds or less, 50 pounds or less, 40 pounds or less.  But - I take that back - I was speaking with Navajo yesterday and I forgot to ask them but I believe they do allow any sized dog and I was also talking with US Express and they also allow any sized dog.  I believe I have an actual offer with Navajo, US Express said they were waiting for various reports they had filed to come back on my record.

Anyway, off to work.

Endless phone interviews.  Fill out one application after another.  Found some sites that show the companies that allow dogs and what size dog.  Many of them won't even think about allowing a dog the size of Addler, but I have found a number of them that have no size restrictions.  I am busily applying at all of them - while at the same time looking for local employment and applying for whatever places I can find - which aren't that many of them.

The alleged truth came out today as to why they suddenly decided that hour cuts were the daily platter.  The temporary driver was saying he was doing 60 hours per week on his time sheets - which is a bald faced lie - and corporate got a hold of that and began questioning the general manager about hours and why are they allowing over 40?  So, allegedly, the company is saying no, no more OT. I don't doubt corporate gets on their case about OT - but - they were getting on the old manager's case the entire time I was working there and he managed to get around it.  It is highly more likely, after hearing some of the new manager's speech, that the new manager simply doesn't believe drivers should be getting paid as much as we "were" and is using this as an excuse for his agenda.

AND...if they were all-so-fired concerned about our pay, they could easily raise it if they wanted to.  There are no rules against that.  The statement now is that they are going to "see what kinds of numbers our branch produces" before they will do that.  Bunk.  It's all just games.  Dangle the proverbial carrot endlessly and see how long they will fall for it.  They already KNOW how much we produce and how much that branch produces on average.  I refuse to work for a company that will just come along and just take that kind of money away from you and give unbelievably lame, pathetic reasons as to why.  I have quit 2 jobs in the past because of it - one place I was working at for 11 years when they came along and cut our pay in half.  A Chinese company had acquired the company I was working for.  It was such a slap in the face, I quit immediately before having another job lined up.  No regrets on that one.  The other was JB Hunt, when senior management showed up at the morning meeting before drivers were sent out and told us we would be having our pay cut full four hundred dollars per WEEK. I was out of there in about 2 weeks - I did find a job before I quit and no, I did not give any advance notice.  They didn't  give ME notice about cutting my wages, they could go stick it.  One of the times that a company shafts it's employees where the company lost BIG time.  Most of the drivers quit, the company lost the contract and ended up losing millions of dollars because of it.

I will keep up this job application pace until I find something.  I've sent out at least 50 applications so far.  I could probably handle OTR on a home every 2 week basis if I had Addler with me in the truck. If not, I just don't think I could handle it.  A dog companion is better than none - especially when spending countless hours inside of a truck.  And, I would consider an OTR job a temporary thing until I eventually found/find a good local job.  The nuances of taking a dog on extended trip is something I would have to research as well, though I have a close friend that did it for decades.  I'm sure he would have some advice to give me on that one. I think he stayed at hotels a lot - something I wouldn't want to get into too much, no point in making money and then handing it out to a hotel chain.

So that's where I'm at.  Just got done with 3 applications and taking a break from it.  It got easier to do after Chrome decided to show a pop up saying all or most of this information has been saved, would you like Chrome to auto fill it?  Oh yes, yes I would!  Of course I review the information it's putting on there, it only fills the information that it has seen as a field to be entered on the form before. Still, saves so much time.  Trucking companies are desperate to fill tractors, that's a fact.  I had a dozen phone calls today and didn't answer several more. Not to mention a cache full of emails and text messages.

The weekend is here, I was sent home 3 hours early.  Which I expected. Came straight home, sat down and started looking for jobs and filling out applications.  I won't do this all weekend long, I will get annoyed with it but I expect to find at least 15 places to apply for this weekend.  But, I will also work around the yard if the weather lets up and probably finish working on the 4 wheelers, at least what I can do until I order the rest of the things I need for them.  Kinda put that on hold - I don't see any good reason to spend money I may need if I don't land a good paying job soon enough.

As the abusrdity of this new schedule sinks in, it only motivates me more and more to send out numerous applications per day.
I found a large list of companies that allow dogs in the truck if it's going to be a regional thing - even regional has you out 2 weeks at a time and I won't do that to my doggy.  Or try not to, anyway.

They are apparently hiring back the driver that was fired for having THC (marijuana) in his system, which is not a good sign for me.  I could be reading it all wrong, who knows, but I don't have any reassurance from this company that my emlpoyment with them is going to go on for as long as I want it to.  The fact that I am facing losing around 13k per year, the new manager being a douche, a forced hour long lunch break - I don't want to take it but they want the convenience of having me around that extra hour per day in case something comes up, how nice for them - all instantly added up to filling out endless applications.

One place, Roehl, called and said they would process my application.  Several others have emailed back after filling out online applications saying they are processing it as well.

I haven't done the actual numbers, but I probably could live off of what I am now making.  But for me to take that kind of demotino in pay for no other reason than their claim that the company only wants drivers working 40 hours - which has been true the entire time I've been out here but they brought me out here at 50 hours anyway - is total bs.  They can get around it - they even admit to it -if they want to.  It's just this new manager.  Reducing another worker's pay by $1.50 per hour.  Forcing the 2 full time drivers to 40 hours and the temp driver to whatever hours they want to give him.

So, the search goes on.  It is my lunch break but I have put in 2 apps during the break already.

Anyway, I left work property so they can't try to get me to do something when I am not getting paid for it.  Time to head back.

One thing is for sure: my company operating over here in Louisiana does not operate the same as my company in Phoenix.  My old general manager took great interest in his employees and made sure that if you were taking care of him, he would take care of you and in my case, he definitely did.

But here?  They don't even care.  You can work your ass off all day long and in the end, it makes no difference at all.  In fact, I was levelled with that information today.

I was informed at the end of the day that I was going to be reduced to 40 hour work weeks, per corporate. I would be required to take a 1 hour lunch break (I don't do lunch breaks, I usually eat while I am driving).  I would not be getting the pay raise - I had to ask again about that for the ... tenth? ... time.  I minced no words in return: I cannot afford a thousand dollar per month pay cut and I will have do what I need to do to take care of myself. That is the jist of the conversastion. They don't give a damn about hard work, they want to reduce me to the pay that a beginner truck driver recieves and that was the final straw.

I will lose the benefits I have spent 10 years in acquiring and now? That isn't going to matter.  My life is basically screwed up right now.  I am not a 20 something that can just switch jobs and think nothing of it.  I'm 52 years old, but being treated like this is total BS.  It's not just me.  But, it's the new manager.  He could care less and I could care less about him. The smirk on his face today caused carnal impulses to arise within me.  He demanded I give him 2 weeks notice if I find a new job.  Yup.  Yes, I'll give you notice, I replied.  Yup, he'll get a notice on the last day of my employment: BTW, here's my notice: goodbye.

I hate looking for jobs. I was doing it a while back but I quit. There were a couple of jobs available that I found, but it would mean sacrificing my ability to be home every night, though weekends were still free.  The pay was 20k more than I am making now without hour cuts.

I'm not going to get in a hurry to find the wrong job, but yes, I am going to spend ample amounts of time looking around and searching on the net until I find my new employer.  It sucks, it totally sucks, but I can't deal with this.  Pauper wages for experience.  The other driver already said he's quitting, already has a job lined up and is going to spite them.  Whether he actually does that or not remains to be seen.  I don't like burning bridges, but when the time comes?  I may just blow this bridge up.  This is simply no way to treat employees that have busted their asses.  We already talked - the other drive and I - about taking our sweeeeeeet old time about getting deliveries done. Just like the temporary driver who is in no hurry to get anything done.
_______________________________________

It is now Tuesday evening, watching the primary coverage.  I was forced to take a one hour lunch break, so I went to Waffle House, ordered a burger and then sat there the entire house filling out applications.  I can't work for this new manager.  He has no concern for the people that work for him, he could literally care less.  A 20 year work was told today he was going to have to take a pay reduction of $1.50 per hour.  A 20 year worker.  How do you treat a person like that?  That has been loyal to the company that long?

I am highly motivated now to find a new job.  No, I don't want to lose my yearly vacation hours over the last 10 years that will go up even more in less than 2 years from now - but I cannot work for this man.  He is an AS*****, obnoxious, conceited, cares nothing about his workers - and I do mean cares NOTHING about his workers.  He has head knowledge of the business, he has no knowledge of how to treat the blue collar workers and life is far too short to work for a d***.  I applied today for 2 local jobs I  found after going through myriads of OTR jobs and I am continuing my search after finishing this entry.

If/when I get a job offer I like, I am going to go over his head and write the general manager a final plea.  I'll work for him for enough money, yes.  But if I leave and the other 2 guys leave, they are screwed and I mean literally screwed.  They will have a warehouse manager that has no extra spare time to pull orders and they will have a temporary driver that knows nothing about the product and doesn't want to learn about the product.  Which reminds me, he was fired from Halliburton and I want to apply there as well. He was fired for failing 2 drug screenings - that's on him.

I am just irritated with this new manager. I thought this going to turn into a bad deal from the first announcement of this situation - and now it has come to pass.  Not just for me, either.  But it's whatever now.  I am hot on the trails of jobs posted and I will relentlessly pump out applications until I land something worth my time and energy.  I will hold out hope for a local job until - that passes and nothing happens because of it and switch to regional searching.  Though, who knows, regional positions pop up regardless of what kind of search I am putting in there.

Well, this one is about to be a wrap.  A final day with mom - probably not doing much of anything which is fine by me and then off to the airport around 8:30 pm to take off at 10:45 and arrive in Dallas at 1:55 am.  Foregone conclusion I'm not going to want to drive home at 2:30 am by the time I get my luggage and take the shuttle back to my car at the hotel, so I am going to look for a reduced rate for a hotel on Priceline and Expedia online in a few.  Next trip will be done quite differently.  The hotel the car is at is a nice one, actually,but now that I have incurred unexpected expenses on this trip, I want to keep the price down.  A comfortable bed is all I need and the cheap chains are good enough.

So I figure 3 am before i even get to a hotel, gag.  Really have to slap myself for  the way I did this trip, but then again, there were very few cheap fares left by the time I got "around to it" and that is partly why I chose the late return.  The other returns earlier in the day were much more expensive.  I'll plan the next trip well in advance and get flights that are in the daytime and still get discounted rates.

Well I did it. I got a deal for La Quinta on priceline.  I'm not sure I have ever stayed at one, but I do know that my Great Dane would be welcomed there so I can try it out and see if it's a nice place to stay.  Supposedly they are fairly nice places.  I will try to sleep until around 9 am and then get up and drive home - in the daylight, thank you. The trip to Dallas was at night time and it was raining and the winds were blowing heavily.  Even the taxi driver was commenting on the wind in Dallas and it pushing his taxi around.

So that's it. Doing some laundry, we are going to go to the dollar store - they sell reading glasses here for a buck that you can only find for 10 bucks over there.  I buy as many of them as they have in the magnification that works for me. Last time it was like 8 pairs.  Ummm, but this time I''m getting a case to hold a pair in, they tend to get messed up easily without it.  9 hours from now, a shuttle will arrive at my mom's doorstep, pick me up and take me to the airport.  I'm kinda looking forward to getting back home and seeing my doggy, to be honest.  My agenda here has been accomplished.

As my time here comes to an end, I can say it was well worth the junk I went through to get here.
I must admit that I made a colossal error which cost me pretty good.  I don't know what happened when I ordered those tickets, but I thought I had ordered Southwest airlines.  So I drove to a hotel 2 miles from there, parked the car there for a cheap rate and took their shuttle to the airport.  Only then did I find out that I had not actually paid for flying with Southwest - which gives 2 checked bags for free - I had American Airlines.

I mean, the agent couldn't find my name in the system and asked to see the paperwork I had.  Umm, sir ... pointing at what the paper says. I felt like an utter fool.  I spent $50 on a taxi to get me from DAL to DFW.  I also had to pay a $25 fee for my luggage and will have to pay that on the way back.  I learn from my mistakes.  I have made several trips back and forth now since this all started, havne't made this kind of error at all.  The only consolation I have now is that I found a shuttle that will take me from DFW to the hotel for $10.  I can deal with that.

I really kind of screwed this trip up as far as travel goes.  Going to work, driving home, driving to Dallas, flying to Phoenix, shuttle to mom's, not going to bed until almost 2 am and feeling groggy all the first day I was here.  And going back.  I won't be back in Dallas until very late and considering it will be Sunday and I will have ot go to work the next day?  I don't want to drive 2-1/2 and get home at 3:30 or 4 am.  So now, I am faced with another expense on this trip for getting a hotel.

However.  I can't complain about my time here.  Mom has been  a splendid host.  My presence here has disrupted her daily lifestyle but she is happy that i came.  We spent Wednesday just hanging out and talking.  Thursday I went and got Caleb and brought him out here and he spent the night. Catching up on stuff and he has taken an interest in politics so we discussed that quite a bit while watching the news updates on all of the candidates.  Mom took us to a BBQ house called Famous Daves - it's a local delight, they have some of the best BBQ anywhere.

We all got up today and just hung out.  I took him home at noon - he is leaving on Tuesday and his friends are all asking him to visit - I was glad to have some time with him and so was mom.  She hadn't seen him in quite a while, either.  I then went back to my house and Mark was there. Oh, I went yesterday but he wasn't there, Sophie, my former dog. She stood there staring at me for a while and then apparently recognized who i am and came up to me and I petted her for a bit.  Today, though, I found Mark over there and I spent a couple of hours talking with him.  After that, off to an old friend's house, visited with him for a couple of hours and then back home.

My goals for this trip have been fulfilled, whatever happens tomorrow is fine and dandy, but I have made my visit and going home is in order.  I am not ashamed to say that I miss my doggy.  I don' think about him all day long or anything, but I know he's missing me and we have started to bond.  I will be more than a bit curious to see what his reaction will be when I finally get home on Sunday.

Anyway, tomorrow I will look on Priceline and others and find something in the lower price range for a hotel that is still decent enough to get a good night's sleep and book it online.

Well that's it.  It's Friday night and it's after 11:00 pm, late enough for  me.

Going to be a long day.
Go to work, a 2-1/2 drive to a jobsite and then that much time back.
That will eat up most of the work day whic is fine.  I would like to leave by 4 if at all possible today...
because....I will still have a lot to get done.  Drive home, finish what I couldn't finish until just before leaving - moving stuff into a room out of Addller's ability to get at it, say goodbye to the giant pup and then drive to Dallas, fly to Phoenix, shuttle to mom's.

Around 2 am, I believe.  Sleep on the airplane or try anyway, it will be night time won't be able to see anything out the windows.

I'm not sure I'm up for this challenge, just not sleeping to well lately but I'm sure there are Starbucks along the way, just gonna have to drink a few strong coffees.

Whatever the case, I'm happy for an opportunity to get back and visit my son just before he leaves for New Zealand!

Gotta git to work.

Hmm. I guess I forgot to hit "send" on the airport parking and never completed the transaction.  I still found a very good deal on parking at a hotel 2 miles away and it has a free shuttle.  There isn't really anything cheap about having to fly out of this area.  You either drive 2-1/2 hours for a cheap price or you pay through the nose to fly out of a local airport.

I'll drive the 2-1/2 hours, thank you and save the $350 plus dollars.  I would have had to pay for airport parking regardless, though if it were the next city over airport landlords likely would have given me a ride.  No ill feel there.  No onto attempting to finally get this shuttle business from PHX to mom's house settled.  You know, it takes a while to find the best deals sometimes. Not always, but a lot of times you realy have to spend a bit of time perusing numerous websites before the "magic" occurs and you find the deal.

My goal was to take a free hotel shuttle to a destination near mom's house, but I am arriving late and I doubt free shuttles will be going that late.  I have some friends I could call for a ride but it's too late to impose on them like that.  So, I'll pay the shuttle fee for round trip - which that particular airport shuttle runs 24 hours a day - and likely I will stay at a hotel anyway for I am really not interested in keeping mom awake til' 1 am for my arrival.  I can stay at a cheap motel near her house, call her for a ride and that will just have to work.

Flying out of Dallas, airport parking fee and shuttle fee I'm at $210.  Add $30 of gas for the drive.  Add $45 for cheap hotel and I'm at $285.  All of that combined is still $200 cheaper than flying out of any airport near hear and I still would have encurred airport parking, shuttle in phoenix and hotel stay if I opt for that.

I'm still a bit peeved about Nathan and his decision to cut off the exhaust muffler and also rolling that 4 wheeler.  The exhuast muffler is going to cost some money to replace,It's noisy and I want it fixed.  I would put on a used muffler if I could find one and save some money.  I haven't tried raising the handlebars back up yet.  Other than those 2 things, though, that 4 wheeler is still in good condition and runs great.  The other one I have ordered the parts for  I replaced some of them but other parts still in transit.  Nothing expensive. U joints, brakes, tie rod ends and a few other minor things.  I just know that if you let things go, more things go wrong because of letting things go.  It's far cheaper to just fix it as soon as things happen.

A Motel 6 for $60.  Gag.  Oops. Mama just told me different, lol.  She has no plans to stay awake but will leave the light and door open (which I think is dangerous for her but she is being stubborn, I won't arrive there until around 2 am).  so I will save the hotel money and take the shuttle directly to her house.  Which is better, actually, for me because going back, when I arrive in Dallas at an ungodly hour, I undoubtedly am not going to want to drive home.  I will spend the motel money then instead.  In fact, I will likely do a priceline or similar when I am at her place and see if I can find a good deal on a decent or even good hotel and treat myself.  I am a fan of Marriots and there is one near DAL.  But, I don't have to have a Marriot, lol, just if the price were right.  Weekends are always more expensive.  Just one of those things, though, at that late of an hour I would rahter have it already booked and an address to drive to from the airport instead of trying to look around.

So yeah I'm getting excited about this trip.  I am going to visit an old friend - old as in high school buddy from the late 70's to early 80's.  He ended up in prison at one point but he has completely changed his life, is happily married and was a good friend then and still is now.  No, I'm not going to judge him for his life choices, we all make mistakes, we all probably inentinoally have done things that we knew were wrong and did it anyway.

Today.  Well, I got up, went to a few places around here looking for tires, then to Napa to get my brakes for the big 4 wheeler I had ordered, over to Chili's to eat some  lunch, get a fresh haircut, of which I wasn't happy with even though I tried to get her to cut it the way I wanted it - and then back home to find the next door neighbor kid and his buddies wanting to "talk" to me.  It's always about the 4 wheeler.  The one that is drivable, not the one I have up on jacks waiting on U joints.  I'm not going to let them use that one anymore, I am fixing everything on it and it's mine to use and perhaps the landlords when we finally are able to go out on a riding adventure.  The one they are using now is much more geared for their liking.  Regardless, they were talking baseball of which I am very knowledgeable about and then we got into their world of already having had signed up for a league and starting soon.  Well show me what you got.  What do you know about it? Umm, I coached it for 10 years?  lol.  Ohh, really? Will you teach us?  They ran to the house, got all of their gear, came running back over and then after 2 seconds of watching them - realized they didn't have a clue.

Throwing, pitching, fielding, catching.  Didn't even see the bat swing, we never got that far. They were throwing the ball and trying to catch it to their side instead of getting in front of it. They were waiting for a popup to come down and then try to grab it from the ground instead of running to it and positioning themselves underneath the ball to catch it.  They were standing to the side of a grounder instead of getting in front of it and getting the glove down on the ground.

Y'all afraid of that ball.  NO WE AREN'T!!! Oh, yes, you are.  How do you figure Mr. Ben?  That's what they call me and I do like the respect part of it.  They aren't ghetto talking, foul language mouth filled trash talkers.  Very respectful and that part I can deal with.  You won't get in front of the ball, anytime it's coming at any of ya you move out of the way. Your coach, whoever you end up with, is not going to like that.  At all.  So i just started barking out orders as I used to in Little League since that's what they wanted and they started getting it.  Yeah, you're going to get hit with the ball here and there, that's part of the game, toughen up, deal with it, field or catch the ball, that's. that.  Encouragement was also offered, of course, and they immediately started improving and one of them admitted he "was" afraid but he "isn't" anymore.

Pitching mechanics were non-existent, but I didn't expect anything since they have never been trained.  I am half tempted to take them  out ot the nearest ballfield and start really dealing with them since they are serious about it and want to learn.  For it is a foregone conclusion they have no real batting skills and I have a very good eye and know how to teach batting mechanics.

But right now, it's all about this trip.  Mom "corrected" me on the hotel and that's fine. She decided I am going to drive her Tundra - pretty nice truck thank you very much. Last thing on the agenda is the shuttle to her house since I can eliminate the hotel now.  Well, that's enough for now.

Well, my trip to Phoenix coming up quick.  Leaving after work on Tuessday, coming home, getting my stuff which will already be packed and taking off to Dallas in my car, get there to pre-planned parking with pre-planned shuttle to airport, get to Dallas Love field and take off to Phoenix.  The flight doesn't take off until almost 11:00 pm, so the 3 hour drive there after work plus short stopover at home - for I want to see my doggy and give him a hug and say goodbye - should be easily doable.

I'm doing it that way to save on usage of vacation hours.  Plenty of other things I want to do this year and I don't want to use them all up on this particular visit.  I would like to plan a 4 day trip over there again later on this year which would include a holiday day so I only  use up one paid vacation or floating holiday - or personal day. Memorial Day would cover such a visit, but we'll see.

General manager coming up tomorrow, allegedly, instead of the Monday arrival date originally planned.  I just - have no great hopes for anything.  There isn't any reason to, they put everything off - intentionally I am quite sure - don't give answers and play the "we don't know yet" game.

I was in Monroe, LA today, attempting to get some pipe that was delivered to a jobsite - the city changed the specs and the pipe was rejected - tens of thousands of feet of it - still sitting there.  We come and get it from time to time as we can sell it, we have no responsibility to take all of that back and the pipe company would take it back, but at a great "restock" fee. Anyway, a very inexperienced backhoe operator attempting to pick up these pallets of 40 foot length pipe and put it on the truck. The problem - mud.  I have been around this kind of stuff for a long time, I can tell when a person hasn't been around the equipment they are operating very long.

He kept getting the backhoe stuck.  2 hours to load the truck.  I just sat there and watched it.  I offered suggestions - such as taking a completely different route with the pipe that would have eliminated getting stuck - but he was stubborn. I'm not going to argue with him, but he kept apologizing for how long it was taking.  Just before we were done - finally done - loading it his boss comes driving up - dude, what is taking you so long? I need that backhoe!  Seriously.  I could have loaded that pipe onto the truck in about 15 minutes.  But it's all good.  Take things as they come.  Enjoy as much of life as you can.  Slow right now, getting that run took up 2/3rd's of the day, this dude making it take longer than it should have? Just made it take that much longer to get back to the yard.

That's it.  I'm just trying to find cheap ground transportation from the airport to and from mom's house.  She will not drive into downtown Phoenix.  I very much like the fact that she knows her limitations - very congested in terms of traffic - and even though it will cause me more expense and time, I don't mind at all.  In fact, I will be arriving late and I figure to find a hotel this weekend with a shuttle that will get me close enough to her place and away from all of that congestion that she will be able to come and get me in the morning - or - I can take a bus.

Whatever the case, this will be the weekend just before Caleb leaves for New Zealand.  After that he is going to Hawaii and I just have no idea what the next opportunity might be that I could see him  - so - gotta make the effort. Mama ain't getting no younger either, this life is never predictable.

I'm not sure what I'm doing next with this life, but at least seeing loved ones is always a good idea.

It was a tough decision, actually, to take that 4 wheeler back.  But after time passed and I continue to think about it I came to the conclusion it was the right thing to do.  I had to go over all of that in my mind again after finding out she is going around all over the place trash talking about me and saying things that are just plain garbage.  But it's whatever.

She erroneously believes that I made my decision based on other nonsense she was saying about me before all of this current episode of antics started, which simply isn't true.  I had made up my mind, I just didn't want to contact her.  I don't want to talk to her in any format, whether Facebook messaging, text messaging, phone call whatever.

Getting the thing back and finding it had been rolled and the exhaust cut off was a bit much to take.  Reading her reaction - she couldn't have cared less, didn't bother her at all-- just sealed it.  The thing still runs great but now facing having to replace the exhaust system and likely the handlebars.

The folks here are all over it, let's get a trailer and haul them things out to the open country and go riding!Of course3, things here aren't all flowers and roses, either.  My "cleaning" activities are not going over well in a strange way.  Because - when I see a dirty kitchen, I pretty much just go and clean it  up.  I don't say anything, I don't complain about it, I don't make an issue out of it, I just clean it up and that's that.  So, I did that the other day and there was some backlash.  Apparently, the lady of the house was not happy that he, the man of the house, hadn't done it when he said he would.  I had thought he was going to do it but when I came home the next day and saw the same mess there, I just went and cleaned it all up and that was that.

I mean, it's like 15 minutes and it's done.  Nothing like the disaster going on over at Val's house where it can literally take and hour and a half to clean up the mess (of which she openly states she doesn't care about).  Well, then the mother in law got involved with it - all behind my back this was giong on of which I was totally unaware, and started trash talking about me because ... why?  I cleaned up a kitchen that her son hadn't?  Here's the thing: It doesn't bother me to clean up the kitchen.  I don't care who gets the credit or whatever, it just needs to be done, is there a problem with me doing it?  Apparently so.

Well, last night's mess is still out there and will be there when I get home today and yes, I likley will clean it all up and be done with it.

Oh well.  Time for work.

Just gonna have to write this, even though my interest in blogging is waning.  I am just not living a very eventful life in any way, shape or form right now, there really isn't much to write about.  My views on politics and religion I have been writing in various Facebook groups and other places on the internet as well. I have pretty much just reserved my blogging for things going on in my life or things that interest me and some knowledge I may be able to give.  For example, the dog antibiotics post I wrote on here years ago still gets several hits a day.  

But, anyway, I was able to finally go and get the 4 wheeler today.  That didn't actually happen til' around 3 this afternoon.  My co-worker was called into work this morning and had to drive clear to Monroe with some pipe and fittings for a contractor in need.  Well, I needed to get started on the 4 wheeler I already have.  I put it on jacks, removed a tire and went to work trying to remove the front drive shaft to replace the u joints.  I have never in my life encountered such a stubborn, irritating situation as what that thing confronted me with.  The next door neighbor kid helping me - he has been riding the thing and I pretty much told him he would either help me fix it or he can not ride it anymore. 

There is a roll pin that hold the front yoke in place.  I had to go buy a long punch to try and get it out - but the space in there is so limited that giving a good hard hit with a hammer on the top of the punch was next to impossible.  That kid and I spent hours on it - but I finally got the thing out of there.  In days of old when I had an acetylene torch, I would have had it out of there quick.  Just heat it up good and it would have come right out.  Next, a trip to Napa to try and get a new roll pin - I thought I was going to get the driveshaft off right away and start working on getting the old u-joints out and the new ones in.

But....after taking off the tire, I found the front brake pads completely worn down and the right side tie-rod was also bad.  Which reminds me, Napa neither had the tie-rod nor could order it, I need to find one online.  Excuse this entry while I go find and order one.....yes I know that meant nothing to the reader in terms of time lost, lol, but I did go and order a whole set for the right side.  If I'm going to replace one side of the rod, I might as well replace both and for only 4 bucks more, it's a done deal.

I get started on so many rabbit trails when I am writing posts.....I ordered new brakes pads from Napa and they will be here by next weekend.  But, though they had a large selection of roll pins, they didn't have the size I needed. No biggies, I will either just punch the old one back in or find another one somewhere else.  

Back to the Polaris Magnum 500, the 4 wheeler I was working on.  Yes, we got the pin out but getting the entire driveshaft assembly? Tried for a while but didn't get that thing off of there.  After 45 minutes of trying, that's when I found out I needed to hit the road and head over to Val's place  to get the 4 wheeler - he, my co-worker, was done with the delivery.  We went over there to find the 4 wheeler - had been rolled.  I am still wondering whether that was done intentional or not.  The handl bar is smashed down - but- everything still works.  So maybe an accident that was just never mentioned to anyone by Nathan, I dunno.  There was a bit of spiting going on out there as well.  A guitar I had bought Rachael for a birthday present was out there as well as the electric little 4 wheeler I had bought the girls for a Christmas present.  My shop vac was out there but nothing else I had asked for.  

And after the way she talked to me today in texting, I won't be asking for any of it.  In fact, I don't care if I ever hear from her again.  The idea that this woman was talking to another man before we got divorced.  There are instincts that have stirred within me that I won't speak about on here.  But I won't act on them, either.  Brought back thoughts of what I used to do to people in my teen years.  I just won't allow myself to succumb to such things but the forcefulness of the emotion that arises is hard to put down.  

Well, that is done.  I could post the things she said to me today- but it would get me going again and I don't need that.  I left the guitar there - they can break the thing into pieces and throw it into the trash for all I care, but I am not going to allow them to have that kind of "satisfaction". And what kind of mom would encourage a 10 year old girl to do such a thing?  I am going to eat the cost of ending the Dish Network over there early - 2 year contract that still has 4 months left on it.  $80 to turn it off. I think they own the equipment.  I dunno, these companies change their parameters all the time.  In fact, thanks for reminding me, blog, I am going to call tonight and shut the service off - tonight.  She is ingrateful, paranoid, hateful, vengeful and holds extreme grudges.  I cannot believe the things she said to me today.  

Done deal. Dish Network is no longer a monthly bill.  It is shut off over there and I couldn't care less. I just cannot believe this woman's vindictiveness.  Her utter anger.  Her hatred towards life and those that want to enjoy it.  Yes, I am very irritated right now.  I haven't talked to her in a while and it was just unbelievable her tones towards me.  I didn't start anything, I just said I was coming to get the 4 wheeler - which she knew was happening because we talked about it in advance -  and that started it off, that was texting, btw, I won't hold a conversation with her on the phone now.  

I'm trying to take deep breathes and get this out of my system. This is the last time I will ever talk to her.  The only thing left over there is my dog buried in the ground. 

Anyway, we went to a place here called inJapan.  It's allegedly great sushi - which I have never had but have been wanting to try and my co-worker brought it up.  So we went.  Unbelievably horrific service.  I mean, it was so bad.  But I said nothing about it - maybe this situation with Val was weighing on me, I thought, and I am just irritated with everything. Better to keep my mouth shut. But, my co-worker who is a totally laid back person finally said: Horrific service. This is terrible service.

Thank you! The service sucks! I could go into a few paragraphs worth, but one example was when the waitress came up and asked if we wanted more water. Well, who asks if you want more water? just bring it, but I didn't say that.  We both said yes and she acknowledged it.  When she came back, she brought him a fresh cup and brought me - nothing.  I got up and went to the bar to get another cup, I was feeling dehydrated and definitely very thirsty.  The food was good, I'll give it that.  

Back to the house - next door neighbor kid still out there trying to get that drive shaft off of there.  I was done with that, no thanks.  Try again tomorrow. He bets I won't get it off of there with a handshake.  Okee dokee, we'll see.  Well today, he insists.  No, I'll get that thing off of there, but I ain't doing nothing on that again today.  Yes, I will figure out how to get it off of there.  

Anyway, that was my day.  After spending most of the day outside and hearing some crazy noises from Addler - he was right on the other side of the fence from where we were working on the Polaris - I am done.  If my hands hadn't been covered with grease I would have gotten that stuff on video, comical. Regardless, Valerie has a way of making me feel very unhappy.  She puts me into such a bad mood.  I can't even fathom the dude that is with her or what he will eventually go through.  

Whatever.  

I'm going to stop blogging for a while.  Or just post random stuff that has nothing to do with my personal life.  

Or whatever.

So, I text her last night. Almost scary to do so for who knows what kind of reply one is going to get from a person like that.  She apparently wanted to get into a conversation, I did not, not after the last texting we had where she emphatically stated "I really don't want to get into any kind of conversation with you at all".  I have learned that she has a boyfriend and apparently had one long before we got divorced.  It wouldn't really bother me if she had one after the divorce, but before?  Just letting it go, though, I want nothing to do with her at all.  Just get the last thing back from her and lose her number.

Friday morning.  Leaving for work early.  Have to make a delivery near our yard - but then I have to head down to Sulphur to pick up a load of pipe and bring it back. That's going to take all day long.  So, I just want to be at the contractor's site this morning at or before they show up so I can get the stuff off of the truck and get headed south.  It's a long drive because the route there goes through numerous small towns with slow speed limits and lots of cops everywhere to make sure you aren't going over that in-town speed limit.  In fact, the last time I drove down there I saw dozens of cops along the way.

Going down I-49 doesn't work, it takes you too far out of the way.  Anyway, I get my other 4 wheeler back and get a hold of a trailer I can start taking them things out to a place that has trails and have some fun on them.  I have all kinds of parts to replace things on the big one, a project I am going to try to motivate myself to do this weekend.  Next door neighbor kid helping since he has been taking the thing with some friends to a property not far from here and riding it.

Anyway, nothing really new here.  I'm not sure if that's a good or bad thing, it is what it is.  I'm not really looking for drastic changes right now, though, excepting would like more opportunities at church.  I have some ideas, however, to do something on my own outside of the church.  I dunno yet but sitting around doing nothing isn't particularly appealing to me.  It gets boring.  I get bored of the internet, too. Especially those Facebook political groups.  I was participating in some of them but some of the people in those groups are absolutely - crazy.   There are people out there that just dont' have a clue.  Which is fine but then they come back at you and go into attack mode when you try to give a differing view of something.

Anyway, off to the races.  And off to Phoenix too, pretty soon, to see my son and my mom ; )