Today's offering:
Well, I have to run over to the truck yard and finish cleaning out of one truck and moving to the "new" truck. The new truck has 350,000 miles on it, but that's half of what the truck I'm has.  It has a fancy driver's seat and a memory foam top bed.  It's clean as a whistle and is in much better condition than my truck. I feel sorry for the team that is getting my truck, they aren't going to like it when the cruise control quits working.  But it's whatever to me, this was given as a choice to me to take it or leave it, the only drawback is moving from the old truck to the new.  It's quite the process because as a person living on the road half the time, I have quite a bit of stuff in there. 

I really don't want to run into other drivers there tho. I've heard enough of the bit*****, I have a very good view of what's going on.  People are unhappy, I get it.  Some people are getting treated better than others, I get that.  I don't like it but I have mixed feelings. If you're a 20 year driver at the same company perhaps you should get some kind of special treatment considering your tenure?  Perhaps, but then again, if you want to keep your newer drivers, you'll have to keep them busy.  More people are talking about quitting, another one just bit the dust.  I should sent a message to management that the don't need to be hiring anyone, but that apparently isn't in their purview of reasoning.

And since they won't bother to tell us what their reasoning is, we are left to speculation, making judgments and assumptions and people getting angry and frustrated.  My guess is that they are hoping to get those contracts back - at the end of the year - and trying to get enough drivers to keep the customers happy.  If that is their goal, they are shooting their foot to save their face.  Getting rid of your good drivers by virtue of not taking care of them is a good way to get more contracts terminated.

Anyway, today we are celebrating Jaxon's birthday.  He already turned 2, but I guess they chose this date for unknown reasons to have the party.  Funny, cause the kitchen is literally in a shambles. All the cupboard doors are off and all the drawers are out - repainting it. 

Oh, and my stock account is finally opened with Chase. I don't know what took them so long, but now all I have left to do is transfer money to the account and figure out what to buy. The "figure out what to buy" part is what's eluding me.  I thought maybe start out with $500 or a thousand worth of penny stocks and "see what happens" but I don't want to just throw money out the window on a bad buy.  So, in the next coming weeks I will be spending voluminous amounts of my free time studying whatever info I can get on how to recognize a good buy, what kind of metrics and info I should be looking for to make the decision. Any start ups will be risky, but minimizing my risk by minimizing the investment may make such ventures worth a try.

Who knows, but I have been wanting to do this for many years now.  And since I have given up on that 77 acres - I simply don't have enough down payment money, it's a rare opportunity for that kind of property that close to town - I am going to invest some of it and see if I can start seeing some returns.  This is literally something I should have done years ago. With my penchant for learning everything possible about any endeavor I get myself into, I feel reasonably confident that I can figure this stuff out and start making money.  It's no more a gamble than my infrequent visits to the casino to play blackjack - and sometimes I do lose.  People make and lose fortunes in the stock market, it only makes sense to at least try and see what happens. 

And buying the stock is easy: just input the symbol of the company, tell them how much money I want to spend and that's it, as far as I can see. 

Well, as much as I'd love to spend more time writing out stuff, I must get this truck endeavor over with, the day isn't getting any younger. 

I mean, gag.
I had the runs yesterday, started shortly after I got done loading at the plant and trying to drive the 582 miles down to Brownsville.  One stop after another after another - til I got to a truckstop and got some some Pepto Bismol.  They didn't have the other stuff I like better - Imodium - at that point? Anything would be better than no relief, especially trying to get the miles over with. 

Whatever.  I made it down there with minutes left on the 14 hours clock - I had spent so much time pulling over lmao.  I pulled into the yard down there and looked over to see some Mexican truck drivers - butchering 2 pigs on the picnic table. I mean, whatever makes them happy lol.  After getting the loaded trailer dropped on the cement pad, I did my paperwork and found - 2 - empty trailers.  The "new" company is trying to do away with as much detention pay as possible.  Makes sense for the bottom line, not very helpful for my profit endeavors.  Anyway,  I "off-duty" drove up to get some food and came back.

By that time, they had the heads of the pigs severed from the bodies and the guts gone and the innards - out lol.  I had to walk by them after parking to dump my paperwork into the mailbox. I got into a conversation with them - they invited me to partake. Caveat?  It won't be done until midnight.  I wanted some - that is some fine food right there - but midnight? I'd be asleep and I was. Sleeping that is. 

In this interim, another driver showed up - we talked for a couple of hours actually.  It started out with bitching about the company - but I wanted off of that subject. We ended up leaving at the same time this morning so we were traveling together up the highway.  During that time, my manager sent me my next run: Mapleton Illinois.  Good run, good miles.  And then "I need you to call me". She usually just calls me so I dunno why she didn't.

So I called her instead.  Marvin - manager in another division - needs to borrow a truck.  Would you be interested in moving to another truck? It's never had a problem, it runs perfectly as far as we know.  It's hard to answer a question like that without seeing the inside of the truck and how it's been treated.  But I thought, couldn't be any worse than the pile of s*** I'm driving now, so what the hey.  I agreed to switch.  She wanted me out of there today, no way!  I'll need to come back in the morning and do that. 

Well, when I got to the yard curiosity got the best of me. I got the trailer dropped, paperwork turned in and then found the truck. It's another driver that just quit. Yup, they're leaving.  Slowly but surely, drivers are finding greener pastures.  I can gleefully say I made a good = guess = on the other truck. It has a custom driver's seat- it's a $2,000 seat. Yes, they have seats that cost that much and more.  It has a memory foam, thick mattress.  It's immaculate inside and out.  The only thing I can see wrong with it is the handle on the refrigerator door is broken off. I will be asking to have that fixed-replaced. 

Anyway, while checking this truck out, another driver showed up. He's newer and very unhappy.  Long story short - he's getting shafted as bad as I have been.  Today is Friday, he said she - our manager - wasn't scheduling him for his next run until Wednesday. WEDNESDAY!!! That's 5 days from now! I've had her doing that shit to me too, tho.  k

Whatever.  I got my account for stock trading up and running.  Now? I have no idea what to invest in. That's going to be a whole nother' realm of investigation and research. I'll probably do penny stocks to start with.  Kind of like playing BlackJack, I want to get my feet wet before  diving in.  Going to dump a grand into the account, look at a lot of info and make some transactions. 

Well I had a lot more stuff but it's getting late. Going to sleep : ) G'nite. 

Tuesday night - late - like midnight type of late.
Just got home.
Monday was miserable.  I woke up at 3:00 am and could never get back to sleep  So I lost 3-1/2 hours of sleep and was driving on 4-1/2 that day.  The everlasting day that could never end.  I was very glad that, when I got down there, there were no trailers.  Not just because of detention pay, but I hoped that I would sleep pretty good after driving all day long and having half a night's sleep previously.

In that respect, my body did not fail me.  I slept almost 11 hours last night - I woke up a couple times and fell right back asleep.  I woke up after 9 am this morning, my head was in a fog.  It took quite a while to fully wake up out of it - I don't normally get that much sleep any time.  But, the truck helps. It runs all night long and it vibrates all night long.  Some people, that would probably drive them insane.  For me? It lulls me to sleep and keeps me there far better than a regular bed.

Anyway, I went to Denny's after getting up and sat there quite a while  - that after asking the yard guy if a trailer was coming up.  Yes, should be here in a couple hours.  When I got back to the yard - about 2 hours later - there was a trailer there.  I got that sucker hooked up and dragged it up here and got it over with.

And, for the past 2 days, Rene has been harassing me, cussing at me, saying all kinds of vile things to me.  I wasn't responding to her.  I just decided to ignore all that nonsense - which of course made it worse - but I felt no compulsion to respond to that s***.  This has been going on for almost 2 weeks now.  She said she was going to block me on her phone - yet again - which I could only dream of her doing that. I wasn't contacting her, she didn't need to block me, I wouldn't have said anything to her lol.

Finally, a few hours ago, she texts me 6 or 7 times.  I didn't look at it for quite a while, but when I finally did, there it was.  All kinds of "I'm sorry", "I'm not going to be mean to you anymore", "I just get mad when you disagree with me", etc etc etc. The last one is the one that really irks me.  Cause' I told her that the other day - you just can't stand it when somebody doesn't agree with everything you say.  You are bucking the wrong person if you think I'm not going to speak my mind.  Ridiculous nonsense. If a person can't deal with another person disagreeing with them, they are in for a very long life. And she's had - a ... very...long....life...

As for work, well, the yard is full of trucks.  So the chances of me going to work on Thursday - today is Tuesday - are slim and none.  But I'm going to text my manager tomorrow anyway and - firmly - ask if I"m getting any work on Thursday.  Because sitting home for 2 days after every run is ridiculous. That's not really a full time job in terms of adding up the numbers of days worked per month.

Finally back in full ketosis.
Sometimes I eat stuff while on the road that I'm not sure about the ingredients.  Kind of take a chance. I mean, it just kicks me out temporarily - but that can take days.  Then I feel like I'm wasting my time with the diet cause I'm no longer using fat as the source of energy for my body. That's how this thing works - that's why it's hugely popular and successful - if - you follow the diet and pay attention to ketosis and do the strips to make sure you are in ketosis - and if not - taking remdial steps to get back into it. Otherwise, you might as well just quit and not do the diet at all.  It literally won't work without ketosis, no way can you eat that much fat and expect to lose weight otherwise.

My remedial step is to simply eat nothing but cream cheese for a day or so. Maybe some pork rinds along with it.  It works.  It isn't the greatest thing on earth, but it's not the worst either.  I'm floating around 200 pounds at the moment 199 being the lowest be really just staying around there. Not gaining or losing.  Well I take that back. My size 34's are definitely falling off of me now.  Much looser than they were. I'm going to get a pair of size 33 jeans - I tried last week but accidentally bought size 32's. 

32 is a long way off. I'm not sure I even want to be that skinny again.  I used to be skinny. Toned, yes but not much meat on my bones.  I don't really see that as all that desirable anymore, just want the weight down into the normal range. 

Anyway, it's Sunday, I've done a lot of nothing today. Well I babysitted the kids for several hours.  It's funny, because when mom and dad leave, those two will just hang out with me the entire time.  No crying, no fussing, just happy happy. Then when the parents get home, they're back to fussing and crying lol.  They don't think it's so funny, I tend to rub it in haha.

I have a run to Brownsville tomorrow and I have unanswered questions that I posed to my manager last night. The 5 days with only 1 run thing - and that one run being almost worthless question. And why? If we aren't slow, what's going on here?  She wasn't happy with my questions and I didn't - and don't - care.  And - the rest of the questions - and questions I haven't asked that i will be asking.  I want to know why she is taking some of the actions she is taking, such as hiring more people that we absolutely don't need.  And putting outside drivers over the group's Ethylene drivers. And on and on. I've kept my mouth shut long enough. Other drivers have asked the same questions, but they aren't like me.

I'm not claiming to be anything special, but I don't take half assed responses that don't answer the question at face value. If the company is forcing her to make these moves, then my grief is with people above her head.  If she is somehow arbitrarily making these decisions, then I want to know why she is making those decisions and based on what metrics?  Any way about it, I will find out.  Either from her or from someone above her, at this point it doesn't matter to me.  It's best to stay ithin the chain of command as long as you can - but there is a point where that no longer works.  And be prepared to find alternative employment.  I have a couple of good leads that I would pursue further if it comes to that. 

Anyway, we are having steak for dinner tonight.  It's keto friendly : )

Dogs will be staying home while I'm gone.  Rene told Maria that I would be "paying $150 per week to have a kennel watch my dogs", thus her stance with Maria that she deserves everything I've done for her.  There's one problem with her argument: I could and will be leaving my dogs at home for - ever actually. I'd just give my friends money for the help, but they wouldn't ask for it.  I don't need Rene or Maria or anyone else outside of where I'm at to watch them. It would just mean they would be outside alone all day long - just like millions of other dogs are left outside, all day long, across America.  Nothing unusual about it, not optimal, imo, but certainly not abusive to the pets. 

Rene unblocked me temporarily to send a text about how wrong I am, ,blah blah blah and then blocked me again before I could even send a reply?  Yup, enough.  She can leave today if she likes, no one would miss her. 

Well, it's time to get some stuff done for my trip tomorrow before it gets too late. Daylight savings time kicked in - gag- last night I'm glad I didn't have to get up early this morning. 

Saturday morning.

The waste of a trip yesterday completed, got home same day, which is expect on that particular trip.  It basically pays nothing.  I mean, compared to most everything else we do, it's just a worthless trip that no one wants to take. It's comparable to Cheniere, another plant I love to hate.  And then, I find out I'm not going out again til Monday. So 2 unwanted days off in between trips, yet again.  Brownsville on Monday.  I love being home, don't get me wrong, but it doesn't pay the bills or save up money.  Well, it pays the bills most likely, it just doesn't give anything extra for savings and goal money.

The thing that bothers me is, my manager told me yesterday we "aren't slowed down right now".  Well then why the gaps between runs?  And, of course, they are hiring more people.  Just sheer stupidity.  They hired a guy to "just do Barnsdall" runs.  Really?  My search for a new job continues.  I"m being picky tho.  I don't need another job like this one or the last.  These companies think they are doing you a real favor by paying you 48 cents per miles.  When you tell them you're making a lot more than that, they - well there is silence on the phone.  Even being a driver's market, there are still many companies that need to up their game. They came up to high 40's per miles, but that isn't good enough.

Meanwhile, I'm still searching for a decent, 3 bedroom house in the area with owner financing.  Not an easy task. The houses that I would consider in my price range are dilapidated run down, nasty looking places. If I wouldn't live there, I don't expect anyone else to live there either.   Rotting wood, facades falling off, paint gone, who knows about the roofs of some of these houses.  You certainly wouldn't want to buy a house and find out it needs a new roof installed on it.  That's major money right there.

I'm in no hurry to make the wrong decision.

Rene has gone into full psychotic mode.  She has been having meltdowns on Maria - who finally caved in and started dishing it back out to her.  Outrageous behavior, Rene needs therapy.  Actually she needs Christ. She has been going to church, but I'm not seeing it having any palpable effect. The sooner she leaves the better.

As for today, the Ford dealership is closed.  I guess I"ll take it in Sunday evening and get my Jeep from the other house to use until I get my ride back.  But they said it's half a day repair so it shouldn't take more than being on one run and coming back and getting it.  Still amazed the dealership quoted less money - by hundreds of dollars - than local repair shops.  And with a 2 year warranty, I'm definitely going that route.

Taylor, upon hearing I will be home this weekend, decided that I should help her paint!  I bought the paint some time ago - enough for my room and for the kitchen, living room and dining room. Like, a lot of paint.  She painted my room and now finally decided to get it done in the rest of the house.  I hope she starts on the kitchen first. The colors the previous owners painted the kitchen are - quite an eyesore imo. Red and green.  Just not very appealing.  I'm not really interested in painting today, but I can help her with taping and moving things and whatknot.  The minutia of painting - the stuff you have to do that takes more time than the actual application of the paint itself.

Whatever the case, I have lots of stuff to get done around here - but - it's going to rain.

_______________

I ended up texting my manager.  Why am I not getting the runs?  As of Monday, I texted her, I'll have been out on one, one day trip spanning 5 days.

Thursday.
Not sure why I wasn't sent out today, but if I don't get a run for tomorrow sent to me by 5 pm, I'll be talking to my manager - again.  We are allegedly in a busy season but I've been sitting for 2 days after last load and also last scenario I was sitting 2 days. But, this paycheck coming tomorrow - which I can go online and see a day in advance, is much larger than I expected it to be.  I figured maybe a $400 gross paycheck, it's over a grand.  I don't remember that many runs on this check. And, I can't see what I'm getting paid for - still - so I'll have to contact the payroll person - again - to send me the details.  It's next week's check that should be quite healthy.  2 or 3 runs on it and 3 plus days of sitting at a repair shop.

Still, that "extra" money this week will come in handy cause I plan on taking my SUV into the dealer and getting the struts replaced.  I dread - really - going over to the other house to get my Jeep. I don't want to see Rene, I don't want to talk to Rene, I don't want anything to do with her at all.  My dogs won't be going over there again until she is gone, I do not trust her and I don't put anything past her.  I really don't think she would spite me by doing something to my dogs, but that little thing inside me says take extra precautions.  I'll pay my friends something extra to watch them while I"m out of town.

Anyway, it's Thursday and Taylor took a day off today  So, we went to Ollie's - they have ceiling fans on great sale! But, getting there, they didn't have half the fans that the advertisement showed. The big fans weren't available and none were coming in.  That's what I wanted,  a big fan for my room. With a remote.  Well, Ollie's didn't have what Taylor wanted, either so we went to Walmart.  Walmart has some higher end fans, but none with remote control.  The problem with those pull chain fans is that the chains eventually break or the switch they are connected to breaks.  Either way, that's the end of the fan and  you have to replace it.

So, after Walmart, Taylor asks if we should go anywhere else?  Well, I guess we can go to Lowe's.  Lowe's has a huge ceiling fan section and they have every single on of them set up from a lowered ceiling so you can see what it will look like instead of having to guess from a picture.  I settled on a huge one with 7 blades and 6 speeds, remote control of course.  So I have that project to do and I may very well get started on it after this post.

But first, I had to put up the new Futon.  I got rid of the old one yesterday - placed an ad in local Facebook Marketplace and had a person wanting it within a few minutes.

No idea if I'm going out again tomorrow- but it's mid-afternoon and I don't normally hear from my manager about the next load until 5 or later.

Meanwhile, they came and got the futon.  So now, ugh, time to tackle the project.

Meanwhile, Maria confirmed that Rene has been drinking heavily. She can't stand Rene now, Rene has literally gone off the deep end.  She lied to me about not being drunk - but she never acts out like this unless she is heavily inebriated.  I'm glad to see her going, I hope to build a relationship with Maria once Rene is gone, every one is now just waiting for her to leave before moving forward with much of anything.  Maria has a good head on her shoulders, that became evident from the get-go and she is only proving more that she isn't off the deep end.

I don't mind going through the pain of having another house on my name as long as I know I have someone competent there to keep things in check. Otherwise, it's 3 weeks before we get out of there. I don't expect to do that - unless - I find a better deal somewhere else.  Or put the money I have on a down payment on a decent house.  So far, that search hasn't come up with anything reasonable.  I have a loan on my house for much more than anything in this area and it's much cheaper monthly payments. I see rentals that have been on the market for a looooong time - probably cause' they're asking for far too much on a monthly rental rate.

Small market here. Lots of lower income. If people are rich, they aren't renting houses for the most part, they are buying land in these parts.

Anyway, I just went from 5k in savings for - whatever I end up doing - to 11k.  No rush to spend money I won't ever get back on bad decisions.  I've already done that in life, not compelled to rush into anything and see that scenario repeating itself.

___________________

Out of curiosity, I called the dealer today about the struts. He quoted me $700 to $800 off the cuff.  I was like okay let's do it now.  But I questioned him on that quote off the top of his head.  Every repair shop in town is telling me a lot more than that. Well, let me price it out and I'll call you back in 10 minutes.  So he called me back in 20, lol.  No, not a big deal but he apologized for it without my even mentioning it when he called.

His price went well up - $1,200, but nothing like the $1,500,, $1,700 and higher prices I have been quoted around town.  It's the dealer, you would expect them to be higher than everyone, now lower. Plus a 2 year warranty on their work. Plus a reputable dealer.  Yup, I'm doing it.  He said he had to order the parts, do you want me to? Yes please.  I need my Jeep back from the other house temporarily while I drop my SUV off and have it repaired.  But he said to not bring it before Friday.

Okay. Meanwhile, my manager didn't bother to contact me today about a run for tomorrow.  I could text her now, but it's too late to do anything about it.  2 days max sitting out tho.   Had a trucking company promising regional runs call me today.  But the pay? lol  $1,250 per week gross pay. That's pauper's pay in the trucking industry, especially considering the amount of driving they want. A recruiter called as well and I got into a long discussion, just for the fun of it.  I called him out on numerous of his claims, where he laughed and said you're right.  Yeah, I'm right and you're a freaking liar.

Recruiters are historically and everlastingly known as complete and total, bold-faced liars. They tell fairy tales.  I call them all out on it now.  Don't even think about starting a line of s*** with me, buddy, I've been around a while, I know this industry, I know what you are saying is bs.

I'm ready to travel, btw.  It's a mind frame that comes and goes. When it comes, I'm ready to jet out of here. When it goes, I'm ready to stay home. No explanation that I can give in logical metrics, just the way it works with me. I could be jetting across the Atlantic right now and be really happy about that . Except the part of being crammed into tight seating arrangements.  Mostly, my legs being jammed up against the seat in front of me.  It gets to hurting after a couple of hours, can't even imagine what an ocean flight would feel like. I'd have to get up numerous times and walk up and down the cabin. I dunno if they allow that anymore.

As for Rene? She sent me this long, rambling, accusatory, scathing text last night.  I didn't reply to it.  No point in it.  It isn't going to change, she isn't going to see anything different besides her own, narrow, anger-laced view.  I'm telling y'all, I have done everything I can to help that lady.  Spent a lot of my own money.  Time. Dedication.  Desire to help people.  Nothing to be gained back from it.  Nothing.  No desire for anything back.  Well, I don't want to be shit on for helping a person.

So, stuck down in Brownsville overnight and part of the next day (yesterday), I was able to spend some time talking with one of the OO's.  He didn't have any advice for me either way.  He stated that they have slowed down OO work and giving company drivers more.  We talked for hours - tho not about company stuff or trucks.  It was really a bummer to find out that the plant down there is shut down, the 2 trailers coming up were going to be the last 2 for days....meaning I could have been down there for days.  The thing is, another driver was ahead of me to go down there, but something was wrong with the trailer and he had to take it back. So I ended up getting down there before him - and losing that position to stay down there.  As it stands, there were 3 full trailers sitting in the yard. That is highly unusual and goes to certify the fact that they have an issue at the the plant that uses the Ethylene.

So I left noonish yesterday.  I figured I might just drive to Lufkin and spend the night there, no sense in having to be out all night long when they don't need the trailer right away.

Wrong. My manager calls me about halfway back up: It shows here that E005 was delivered to the yard down there, is that the trailer you are pulling back up?  Yup.  I knew what was coming before she said it: "Well I have it scheduled for a load tomorrow morning, I need it up here tonight".  I just said okay, I'll get it done, knowing full well it would be midnight or later by the time I get home.  And it was 12:15 am when I finally arrived at the doorstep to "my" house, dogs in tow. I wasn't going to leave them at the other house all night long.

Addler was really wanting a lot of attention both last night and this morning. In fact, he decided all on his own this morning that he was going to get out of his bed and come join me in mine.  140 pounds of dog that gets up into bed and then falls on top of you....that's what he does lol.  Meanwhile, I have someone coming to get the old futon today.  Hopefully anyway, I posted a "free" ad on marketplace and had a taker within minutes.  It's addlers bed, but I have a brand new one, sitting here waiting to get the old one out of the way.  It's a very nice Futon I bought, but there is no room to put it together with the other one in the way.  I'm trying to transform my room into something nice. It's a slow process cause' I have to buy new everything.  Computer desk is next on the list. I want one of those beautiful glass versions. 

I woke up much too early this morning - 6 straight, solid hours of sleep but not enough and couldn't get back to sleep.  Just get up and take a nap this afternoon.  Hopefully get sent back out tomorrow.  I can't sit around too long, when I do I start losing the desire to drive and then the first day back at work really sucks, as it did on Monday. 

This money that was given to me jumped my savings account up to almost 11 grand.  I figure another 9 grand and I can think about finding some property.  Like 50 to 100 acres worth.  That can be partially zoned for a small mobile home park, the rest play area preferably with a decent house on  it. Either rent it or if it's nice enough, get out of here.  I'd have to talk the folks into moving with me  tho, lol. But, they are down for country living on a big property, just has to be somewhat close to town. 

Well, today.  Not sure, I'm really not motivated. I mean, if they come to get this futon at 4:00 pm, I'll have my hands full getting the old one out and then setting up the new one. That may just be enough for one day's goals considering lack of sleep and having had driven all day yesterday and potentially having to go out again tomorrow somewhere.  I was going to take Rene to Applebee's for final outing before she leaves, but she blew up on me again out of the blue and I'm done with her.  She really pissed me off, calling me names, calling me a dictator, all kind of nonsense.  She got mad because I wanted a married couple that are friends with my friends here - and have become my friends as well - to come over and look at the house and room she is vacating soon.

She hates him because he pressed the issue with her about calling the FBI on our neighbor's son.  She lied, saying she never called the FBI, but there is written documentation to prove it.  She called that boy a domestic terrorist! Anyway,  I just can't stand her anymore.  She's always right and the entire world is wrong type of person.  Her way or the highway.  I flat stood up against her and told her opinion is no longer relevant about who moves in since she is leaving.  That infuriated her - but she had already dug her nails under my skin so I didn't really care at that point. Her opinion really isn't relevant.  She won't be living there.  She is the most ungrateful person I have ever met.  I really bent over backwards to try and help her out. 

I have been helping people all my life, sometimes I regret having done so. In this case, definitely sorry that I went out of my way.  I don't need anyone to watch my dogs while I'm gone, I can leave them here, my friends will watch them. It's just a nicety that they have a place to go to and can hang out with humans and be tended to instead of left outside all day long.  They get attention and I like that cause' I'm gone for days at a time.  And dogs, when left alone, can get into trouble.  Tear things up and destroy things. 

Well I think I"ll head up to the bank and deposit this check. It isn't doing me any good sitting here....

So.

My manager and the mechanic were lamenting about the high costs of truck maintenance today when I got back to the yard - discussing my owning my own truck. 

I listened to them making their case for quite a while.

It's much easier to be a company driver and let a large company do everything for you. 

It's also a myth coming from them that paying for things is going to make me feel like I've made a mistake. The mistake I've made is never going into this business on my own.  Even if the merger with the company has them making less money, it's still going to be a whole lot more than I am making as a company driver.

____________________

That was yesterday. I didn't see any of the OO's at the yard so I got out of there.  But, not before finding out I have a Brownsville run on Monday.  Perfect pairing for 2 grand worth of detention pay and will be able to get it filed before the deadline, 2 Fridays from now will be an excellent payday for only a week's pay. 

Their spiel did nothing to deter me from continuing on with my desire to get into this business in a way that will actually line my pockets - or bank accounts - with money and get on with this.  I haven't made up my  mind yet, but I'm hardly deterred.  They said their tire program for OO's ended when the company switched over to the "new" - lame - company.  So take off what, 10k per year worth of tires. And some other type of inpsection that has to be done twice a year they've added at $500 per.  The rest of expenses remain unchanged, they're expenses, lol. 

But yes, I'm going to consult with 2 OO's there before I move forward.  And anyway, that lady from the finance company didn't call me as she said she would yesterday, I don't expect to hear from her until monday. 

So, it's Saturday, I have the weekend off. Going to Brownsville Monday - and they told me I will be getting a hot trailer.  Meaning I will be stuck at Eastman for up to 5 hours waiting for them to purge the air out of the trailer. That's what a hot trailer is, one that has air in it.  No air, you don't want any air at all in those trailers, they say it creates an environment where the trailer can blow up once it's filled with Ethylene. 

They aren't going to like me showing up with a hot trailer in the 3rd position.  That means everyone loading after? Are going to have to also wait up to 5 extra hours.  They fill the tank up with nitrogen and then slowly purge it back out with Ethylene. Like, reeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaallllllly slow. 

Apparently Rene isn't even waiting until the end of the month to leave.  Her friend is driving clear down here to get her stuff, pack it up and take it with her.  I'm not sure what will be left.  There is a couch and other furniture in the living room that she secured I think through church, no idea whether she's going to take that with her or not - would prefer not, but it's whatever.  She's all excited to go.

I'm not going to pooh pooh on her party, but I have serious doubts it's going to be the gleeful wonderland she expects it to be - well expecting the reefer.  She'll be getting stoned every day, i guess, and living for free.  But she believes she is going to fix her family.  It's a nice goal and stuff, but from my own experiences and watching dozens of other people attempting to go through that, it's pretty much impossible. Once the wounds are inflicted, people seem to never get over it.  I've completely washed my hands of my middle brother and don't care if I never see him again.  I mean, I knew once my brothers didn't show up for dad's memorial service that this rift would never be closed. 

I don't understand it, but I've caved into the idea that the only time we will ever be forced together to make decisions will be at mom's ending.  A time of life I'm not looking forward to and am planning another quick trip to AZ in the next few months to visit with her again.  Her situation concerns me.  She's getting up there, she doesn't have hardly any help to do things around the house and she is getting frail.  It's what old age does to you.  She goes for walks every day and does take care of herself, but....

I was thinking of asking my friends at my house there if they could visit her once or twice a month to help her out and I would just eliminate their rent altogether in exchange.  Actually, he's getting up there too, but he still has enough energy to do basic things around the house.  That's another bridge I'll eventually have to cross over.  I don't know how long they intend on staying there.  He's in the middle of a class action lawsuit and expects to get money out of it - but I suspect that's a few years down the road.

However, they aren't talking about moving anywhere with that money, instead, they are talking about doing improvements to my house.  I'm comfortable with the arrangement we have as long as they want to do it. I mean, it's a 30 year loan on the house, I'll be old old old if even still alive by the time that place is paid off. 

Well, ending this one.  Taylor is going to work at 4, meaning dinner needs to be ready by 3:30 at the latest.  We are having the 3rd of 4 prime rib roasts.  I left the biggest one for last.  No idea when we'll eat it, but a special occasion would be nice. She asked to have this one cooked today, so cook it we will. 

I'm very happy right now. 

They did not finish the truck today. They are replacing an entire wiring harness. I knew when they told me that it would take hours upon hours to finish that.  At around 5:00 pm, I asked the supervisor - do you think y'all think you'll finish this today?  Uhh, no.  Lol, I smiled, thanks! I'm paid by the hour, I actually don't care how long this takes.  

I'm curious as to whether they will finish tomorrow. They may get the wiring harness done, but they still have another problem they haven't even looked at yet.  Further, there is no guarantee that when they get all this wiring back together, that the problem won't still be there.  Remember, this is the 5th shop this truck has been at for the same problem.

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Day 4.  Had an excellent meal at a local Mexican food restaurant last night.  I had Fajitas without the fajitas, lol. No beans, rice or tortillas.  Spiced it up with having them bring me a couple of sliced up jalapenos, seeds intact.  It was quite tasty and keto friendly. 

This morning? I'm at the 3rd hotel since coming here.  This one is a keeper.  6 story affair, has it's own breakfast restaurant, rooms are clean, nothing fancy but great service.  I'm expecting this to be my last day here.  Unless the clunking noise is some huge problematic fix issue, I should be out of here today.  Well, that's also dependent on when they get the wiring harness back together, install it and the electrical problem goes away - or doesn't.  I'm curious as to whether they would want to continue on with the truck if their fix doesn't work? 

Remember, this is the 5th repair shop and the 4th Peterbilt shop it's been to. But, none of the other shops took out the wiring harness to figure out the problem.  This shop has gone to great lengths to try and figure out what's wrong with it and get it back on the road issue free. 

After much consultation yesterday, I determined that I finally got the pay for the Amarillo run. It was confused by the fact I got a $450 safety bonus.  Not really sure what that was for but I won't turn it down.  It was a rather large check - for once.  After weeks of small checks, this one was really needed.  And, the one I'm working on now.  I'll have 72 hours of breakdown pay as of an hour and 45 minutes from now.  Give me one good run after this and 2 paychecks from now will also be nice and hefty.

Right now, tho, I'm trying to make up my mind about owning my own truck.  The lady from that company - it's not our company at all, it's a separate finance company that our company uses - is supposed to call me today.  I have lots of questions for her, she didn't want to do it email which is fine.  A few questions - what's the oldest truck allowable?  How much of a down payment?  How much are the monthly payments?  How frequently are the payments made? Auto-deduct or bill pay? 

And a question for my company, since we're hauling hazmat, how much insurance do I need? Probably a lot more than any regular trucking operation.  I have other company drivers that I can ask about who they get their insurance through, unless our company offers that as well.  I was also talking to an OO at the shop yesterday. He's only been trucking for 6 years, but jumped into owning his own truck after only a couple. The point is - there is a lot more money to be made doing the exact same thing I've been doing for decades.  I've always been hesitant about it, just seems like you're "married" to your truck.

But I'm "married" to a company truck and there doesn't seem to be much difference besides the amount of paperwork you have to fill out to keep track of your expenses for tax-time. There is no breakdown pay for OO's and you have to save up some serious money in case something goes wrong.  Engine overhauls can be as much as 30 grand.  In-frame 15 grand.  Transmission problems can go into the ten's of thousands as well.  That's the other question, who can I buy a truck from? Does it have to be a dealer or can it be private?  I'm thinking a dealer, tho, with a warranty.  Even a purchased warranty.  I've seen it happen too much a driver buys a truck and something major goes wrong with it and they are zapped with a huge expense right off the bat. 

But, the end game here is retirement. There are plenty of OO's taking home 125k, 150, some even more per year after all expenses and taxes paid out.  The driver I was talking to yesterday says he spends 60k on fuel per year - but even with that he still takes home around 130k. I'm saving somewhere around 10k per hear. With that kind of money I could put away 50k per year and be done in 10.  This is something that I am thinking is worth the risk. The worst that could happen is I lose the truck, go bankrupt and oh well.  Neither of those are in any part of my "plans", I just tend to look at every possible ending. The realistic end game is that I might not make as much per year as some of these truckers that are on the road 24 hours a day, but I know i can make a good chunk of change from the reports of other OO's in our division. 

I honestly hate driving trucks. But it's the only thing I know that can make any kind of money. Forklift operator? Sure, I've operated forklifts since 1985 - you'd be lucky to find a place paying $20 per hour.  More like $16 or $17.  That's Ferguson, 35k wages - in my view that's poverty.  It doesn't even sustain a decent standard of living.  When I say decent, I don't mean brand new vehicles and big, lavish houses, I just mean a normal, American lifestyle.  Of course, normal for us? Is filthy rich to most people in this world. 

Anyway, I expect that the phone call today will help me make up my mind one way or the other, but if I'm going to do this, I want to jump into the pool and get completely immersed in it right away.  Even if it means going out "on-call" sometimes and being away for a few weeks here and there, the end goal is worth the sacrifice - if  - it gets me there. I don't want to be working when I'm 70, if I make it that old.  65 at the most.  In order to do that, I have to have a rather radical plan to achieve that, get half a million saved up at least and finally retire. 

Well, whatever. My checkout time approaching.  Enjoyed this hotel tho. Wifi works good, quiet, clean and nice, undented furniture and chairs without stains on them.  I'm kind of ready to go home tho.  If they don't get this truck done today, another driver I was talking to says this particular shop is closed on the weekends.  Worse comes to worse? I'll take Taylor up on the idea of coming up and getting me, for the weekend at least. 

Yesterday - being stuck at that shop from noon til around 5:00 pm, started getting old.  They won't give me a time frame so I can't ask for more than a day at a time for the hotel, meaning hanging out in the driver's lounge.  At least they have cable TV with half decent channels on it and numerous electrical outlets.  And several restaurants right there.  But it still gets boring.  

Well, it was boring until this other Hispanic/Latino driver showed up. I'm one of those "how's it going" people without being asked if they want to be spoken to.  We get into this conversation and lo and behold, this guy is from Brownsville - the place I like to go as frequently as possible and haven't been there in a while.  So we had some common ground and he named a few places that I have been to down there.  

So, this dude pulls out his phone, pulls up a video and hands the phone to me. Shocking video.  I sincerely mean that.  I watched from the camera view of a man sitting in the back of a pickup driving up to a house.  The man stands up, pulls up a fully automatic,  military grade assault rife (a real assault rifle) along with the others in the back of the truck and immediately starts blowing away people standing in front of the house.  I mean, I sat there and watched them dump at least 50 rounds into one of the men's bodies.  They jump out of the truck and slowly start walking towards this house, into the garage, having killed unknown numbers of people, their bodies laying there, freshly dead.  

They were in no hurry, no panic that police might arrive.  The dude explains to me while watching that the people in the pickup are a local drug cartel and that the people they went to find and blow away are a cartel from Tijuana - a long way away from Matamoros - and were encroaching on their territory.  A big no-no, apparently, in the world of cartels.  I then asked why they seemed so calm?  Why aren't they in a hurry to get out of there? Aren't they afraid of the police showing up? "No, no, he laughs, they own the police, they tell the police what to do".  They would have blown the police away if they had shown up.  And with that kind of weaponry, I wouldn't want to be anywhere near those people.  Like the cartoons, it seemed like they had endless rounds going through their rifles. 

Then I had to ask the question: How do you know these people?  Oh that guy with the camera attached to his body is a friend from High School days. They tried to recruit me into that - I used to be a bad ass in high school - but I told them that I was married with 4 kids and I had settled down. 

I mean, it was surreal.  Just some random stranger handing me their phone showing me that stuff. It was all done in Mexico, no laws broken here.  The only recompense these killers will ever get will be in the afterlife.  Not wishing that upon them, but obviously they are immune to anything law enforcement there will do.  I've encountered Mexican police many many times, every single one of them is corrupt.  They want your money, you don't have to have done anything wrong, they see you're white, pull you over and give you 2 options: Pay them off or go to jail.  Jail? Is a shack with a dirt floor and a hole in the middle go to the bathroom in, filled with other men.  I've seen it first hand once when trying to bail out a friend over there that had done something stupid.  

Anyway, I was warned a while back while in Brownsville not to go into Matamoros, but if I did, stay in the central part of town and don't be there after dark.  Well after seeing that video - the dude claimed it happened 2 days ago - I'm not sure I'll ever go back to any border town in Mexico.  Maybe, I really like going shopping over there, haven't done it in ages, if I'm stuck down there at some point, who knows.

Speaking of stuck, they told me last night that the truck wasn't going to be finished.  I said great! lol another 14 hours at least of breakdown pay!  I'm pretty sure that breakdown pay is continuous, 24 hours, not like detention where they take out 10 hours every day.  I went to get some clothes out of the truck - upon getting to it, well they had the front end torn off of the thing.  Wires laying out, some dude working on a seal on one of the rear axles, all kinds of electronic equipment hooked up to it. 

Yeah, no, lol they weren't finished yesterday.  I asked them about the lights - they had found the problem, one of the main connectors for electrical wiring had burned out for known reasons.  But I forgot to ask about the rear tail lights.  I'll be doing that today.  I'm not leaving there until all the lights are working.  They didn't even know about the clunking noise, either.  I told the lady whole was writing stuff down.  I dunno if she just didn't get it written clearly, but they gave me a look like they didn't know what I was talking about.  Well, when I'm loaded heavy around 80k pounds and turning there is this evil clanking going on. And bob-tailing up here, I was hearing the same clanking when hitting bumps. Like metal on metal.  

Well, okay, when we get the truck back together we'll take it for a drive and check it out. 
Good cause' whatever that noise is, something's going to give sooner or later.  I'll take another night here if possible.  As it stands, I've got 48 hours here coming up in just 45 minutes.  That's a nice chunk of change.  It's not enough for an entire paycheck, but it actually comes close.  And since I doubt I will get it in time today for next week paycheck, whatever driving I do this coming week will be clumped together with it and that should equal a nice, healthy paycheck for once.  

Well, we have ourselves February, so today the last day of the month.  Usually catches people by surprise - for paying rent.  Thinking they have 3 or 4 more days before the 1st.  But I have a new tenant in the house over there, hopefully he'll ante up, all 3 rooms are filled until the beginning of next month.  That pays for all the bills there excepting maybe $15 to $25 and that I gladly pay in exchange for my dogs having proper care all day long versus being left alone in the back yard, getting into trouble - allllll day long.  As it stands, my friends got a puppy and it's left outside from early morning til around 7 or 8 at night.  

So what does the dog do?  IT gets into everything, including my pond plants, which it knocks over, pulls the air hose out of the pond - it aerates the water for the fish, jumps into the pond takes a bath.  I'm thinking I'm done with ponds.  At least in this setup.  Just not worth trying to keep something nice and having a stupid dog tearing everything up. Their last dog did that too, tearing up the pond and jumping into it all the time.  You can't keep a pond in nice condition with a dog toying with it all the time and the only way to keep them out is to put up a fence around it, which sucks and defeats the purpose of having it.  So I'm likely to get rid of it, have a truck full of dirt brought over and fill up the hole this summer.  

I mean, if you have a dog and you don't give it attention, they are going to find things to do and the aftermath is usually not so great.  As it stands there is stuff laying all over the place from the dog getting into everything.  Between that dog and the neighbor's trees constantly, year round, dumping stuff onto the yard?  I don't have the time or the motivation to deal with it.  And it's not my house, so I don't feel compelled to be the only person having to deal with yard issues.  I get why some people get dogs and don't give them attention: protection in the back yard during the day when they're at work.  Next door neighbor has one that is alone all day long.  But when you come home, I'd think you'd bring the thing inside and give it attention.  They didn't say protection was the reason for getting the thing, tho, they just wanted their own doggy. 

Anyway, Just something I have to bite my tongue on.  Not worth getting into.  The back of the house is in a shambles and when I clean it  up? It's a shambles again in a couple of days.  Like I hadn't done anything.  I've never seen trees that dump stuff all year long. Leaves, dead branches, these gumball things they call them with spikes all over them - they're the seeds.  And acorns.  Acorns everywhere and a pain to rake up. The absolute worst part, tho, is the neighbor's yard. It is covered with a thick layer of that stuff, they never - and I mean never - clean it up and every time it rains?  That junk comes flowing throw the chain link fence and right into our property.  If it were my place, I'd put a block layer about a foot high there and force that water to go down towards the stream, where it can flow into all day long and not affect anything.  

  I would never, personally plant those kinds of trees. I would plant pine trees if it were my property.  I don't care about pine needles, they're easy to clean up.  As long as you keep on top of it...but again it's not my property, I'm not spending any money on it excepting making my room nicer and I guy grass seed and small ticket items here and there.  Well, I also by stuff you have to have - like paper towels and such. And of course I pay the utility bills there and internet and satellite.  It adds up to maybe a little more than a room is worth, but it's fine. It's a huge room, walk in closet and it's own bathroom. 

Okay, well enough of that. Trump's summit failed - Kim refused to agree to getting rid of all of his nukes and the US said no thanks, we aren't lifting sanctions til you do.  Cohen fed his lines of bs yesterday and of course the left fell for it hook, line and sinker, CNN falling all over itsself coming up with dozens of stories before the hearing was even concluded.  I have no idea what's going on in politics today because I burned myself out on it yesterday.  Nothing new, I'm sure.  Well, I take it back, I did see that Joe Biden is calling Trump supporters names.  

"Former Vice President Joseph R. Biden assailed President Trump’s supporters during a speech Saturday at the annual Human Rights Campaign dinner in Washington, lamenting that “virulent people” and the “dregs of society” still had a friend in the White House.

Mr. Biden told an enthusiastic crowd of LGBTQ rights advocates that social conservatives at home and abroad who used religion or culture as a “license to discriminate” were committing a “crime” of prejudice.

“Despite losing in the courts and in the court of public opinion, these forces of intolerance remain determined to undermine and roll back the progress you all have made,” he argued. “This time they — not you — have an ally in the White House.

“They’re a small percentage of the American people, virulent people,” he continued. “Some of them the dregs of society. And instead of using the full might of the executive branch to secure justice, dignity [and] safety for all, the president uses the White House as a literal, literal bully pulpit, callously exerting his power over those who have little or none.”

That'll win you votes!  Call a bunch of supporters stupid names. Worked well for Hillary, calling us Deplorables! Ended up they made and sold T shirts, coffee mugs and hats out of that "slogan" lmao.  See, what I've been noticing for the last year or so is a bunch of undecided people that are throwing in their vote for Trump come next election because they're sick of the way the left is acting out.  Many of them don't even like Trump, but refuse to support a party acting like babies.  

Whoops, forgot the truck purchase.  Valley of Decision time. They changed their stance, I can purchase a truck through their program and stay at the current terminal, but....if it gets slow I have to go temporarily somewhere else until the work picks back up again.  That means I would be shipped out before any new people or even the loaner drivers.  Not exactly fair and I could be out for weeks - anywhere in the US.  I asked the lady to send the particulars - of which she sort of did. It didn't say anything about whether they have new and used vehicles available and how much the payments are, operating authority, etc etc etc, lots of regulatory stuff.  

I want to know the payments, the frequency of the payments and how long I would be stuck making those payments before the truck is paid off.  It isn't rocket science, but prying info out of them seems to be much more problematic than necessary.  I never heard about if I buy my own truck, either.  Plenty of used truck dealers around, I dunno what they want for down payment or for payments, but the cost of a new truck is quite outrageous.  Well over $100 grand and that's for a base model. Whereas, you can get a used one in good condition for around 30k and at $1,200 per month payments, which seems to be the norm, it's not going to go on forever.  3 years max and it's paid off and done with.  I could deal with that.  I really don't know what I would be getting myself into going OO, I've asked other OO's there and they are good with it, but still.  

So I sent her another message asking if she knew about those particulars.  Awaiting a response. There's actually quite a lot more I could put into this post, but it's getting pretty long. Still a couple of hours before I'm forced out of here and back to the repair shop, I'm going to relax and take advantage of it.  This Marriott I'm in now is far better than the Best Western i was in yesterday.....g'day. 

Wednesday, 27th of February.  Watching the spectacle of Michael Cohen's testimony about to begin and the summit with North Korea.  And on Facebook in groups where people spout off "facts" that have no clue what they are talking about concerning politics.  People hear what they want to hear and turn it into a twisted story of their version of truth.  Some of it is highly entertaining, some of it is amazingly stupid. 

I'm waiting until around 9:30 am to call the shop and get a report.  Well, maybe 10:00 am, I don't have to check out until noon.  My hope would be that they can't fix it today and spend another night here, the reality of it is: who knows?  This problem has eluded numerous other mechanics, but this shop says they are going to discuss the situation with the actual manufacturer of the system that is malfunctioning to see if they can fix it.

Our mechanic, after looking at the codes, spelled out what he would have to do to find the problem.  A series of tests throughout the system that would likely take "days" to complete.  Not really in love with having to take Lyfts or Ubers back and forth, I'll get reimbursed but if there is another night here, it's not going to be at this hotel.  The only restaurant nearby is the one in the Holiday Inn and there is nothing else within walking distance.  But, that bridge can be crossed if it comes.  I'm closing in on 24 hours of breakdown pay, something I haven't had in a while and something my paychecks have reflected.

That along with not enough work.

No great plans for today.  Nothing to do but watch the news and read stuff on the net.  At least this hotel had breakfast and included sausage, something I can eat on my diet.  They had egg omelettes of which I grabbed two, started to eat one and then realized they may have added milk to it.  Milk is a no no.  They actually had almond milk in the fridge down there, amazing surprise.  Keto/low carb is much more popular than I understood it to be. 

The Holiday Inn restaurant didn't have any actual keto selections, but a lot of meals can be modified to make it so, I just ended up with a burger, no bun or sauces save mustard, some broccoli and - got stuffed on it. The burger patty was huge. 

I haven't lost any more weight, so I'm going to get serious about this again. Not that I have strayed from the low carb stuff, but more serious about counting calories along with carbs.  It would be really nice to get down to goal weight and get this over with.  Right now, I just eat whatever is low carb and keep track. I kinda lost the idea of calorie counting. Starting today I'm going back that route.  I had 4 small sausage patties, about 370 calories. My goal will be to keep it around 1,200 today and go for a walk, at least, to burn off some energy. 

And the speculation about Cohen goes on. He's going to call Trump a bonafide racist, reportedly and allegedly show ties with Russia.  The man is a certified liar, his credibility will be shot before he enters the hearing room. Whether he's telling the truth or not?  Well, I'm more interested in the never-ending Mueller investigation and the elusive report. Supposedly the new DOJ director is ending the investigation and the report will be out soon.  And supposedly, they may try to keep the report from the public. 

I don't care what that reports says, after all of this time? I want to see what it says, especially considering the amount of division this investigation has caused this nation. 

Soooo.......I am talking to my manager and they are talking about sending the truck up to Texarcana to a peterbilt shop up there.  Like, who were they going to send up there?  I don't get these people, but this is what they were going to do last time this happened and the truck was at the yard.  I'll be happy to take the truck up there myself.

Why? Because I am paid trip mileage and I am paid an hourly wage after I get it into the shop.  And, with the list I'm going to give them? It's not going to be in there for an hour.  It might be in there for days, frankly, which means 24 hour pay plus hotel stay unless they drive up to get me.

Which, judging from the stay over in Lufkin, isn't going to happen.  It's actually a little further from our yard to Texarcana than it is to Lufkin.

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So, it's the the next day.  In Texarcana.  Been here 3 hours - our company called and made appointment.  Been sitting here 3 hours and they still haven't even taken the truck into the shop - and I gave them a list of things that need to be done to this truck.  I'll be sitting here all day until I can finally get them to tell me they won't have this done today -- which I can't imagine they will but who knows - and then I can call my manager and tell her to either send someone for me if they want or set me up at a hotel.

I'll wait to make that call, tho, since I'm making breakdown pay right now, pay that I would really like to accumulate for a couple of days if possible - hence the long list of items to fix.  The electrical problems should keep them busy for  a while.

Anyway, I'm sitting here with this old vet who's got more stories than Carter's got liver pills.  Interesting, but I kind of had enough after a few hours of it.

That's it for now. I'm a wait til later before going into anything.

Monday morning.
No clue what's going on at work with  the truck, but I"m going to find the number for the lady over purchase program and call her in a while and find out the details of their program.  Rest assured I do not want to buy the truck I am currently driving.  700k miles, endless problems, no thanks.  I don't even know if I'll qualify or what the requirements are since there is nothing I can find anywhere on the internet from this company telling about the qualifications. 

Meanwhile, flooded with emails and a few phone calls about the application I put in.  But, as suspected, they are all OTR garbage, not interested. 

__________________

Well. I got started on the leaves out front.  Huge mess, hasn't been touched the entire leaf-falling season.  When I come home, it's raining almost all the time.  So it eliminates the ability to be able to do anything about it.  Well today it's not raining, tho it's windy and that was making it difficult.  I've got 2 huge piles right now going.  I only stopped because of the endless phone calls that I am current getting - and ignoring from prospective trucking companies - one of them was my manager.

She asked me why I hadn't shown up for the load today?  Uhhh, Ann, I thought, are you daft, but not saying it?  She has a very poor memory.  I informed her that the truck had lights out and a fuel gauge not working, remember?  She replied she "thought you were going to use another truck". Well whose responsibility is that to assign that other truck, much more bring up the subject?  She still asked if I wanted to transfer to another truck - no thanks. I"m tired of that. 

I'm not going to keep writing up the same problems, over and over and over - and have those same problems continue to be ignored.  After the phone call, I took a screen shot of where she left this. The conversation was that the repair shop was now closed on weekends so I replied, "Okay, now what?".  Receiving no reply, I said take it to Peterbilt on Monday. Or take it to National I guess?  It was hours later she finally responded and said I will discuss it with Ryan (mechanic) and we'll take it somewhere.

There was no discussion about another truck.  She isn't playing that one off on me.  This is why I keep all of my text messages with anyone associated with the company. 

Anyway, I ended up calling the truck purchase program office and asking about the details.  The lady said she would send them to me - which was hours ago and still nothing either in regular inbox or spam inbox.  I'm guessing she didn't write my email address down correctly. I'll have to call back and ask if she had sent it yet. 

But, in all of that, I have still been outside, raking up leaves, hauling them around back and burning them.  After hours of that, I can honestly say I am tired and don't feel like doing any more today.  I'll undoubtedly be home tomorrow. I can pick up where i left off.  I got all of the leaves that I had raked up at least to the back and burning.  Would be a waste of time to do all of that work and then just leave this huge pile sitting there for the wind to scatter back all over the yard again. 

I literally could have a job with 50 different companies right now.  Not a single place that has called me would turn me down.  Only a few I was interested in. Tutle and Tutle being one of them - until I found out reading their website that the "typical well" runs out in about 2-1/2 to 3 weeks and you are expected to stay there the entire time? lol

Another is the wood chip hauling - they are still hiring from my town.  That's a day job.  There's a fuel hauling gig out of Shreveport, but I'm not sure I want to drive that far to work anymore. Did that for 3 years and really wasn't in love with it.  Then there's this guy practically begging me to join his company - it's literally the owner of the company, been texting me since yesterday.  But that's out 5 days. The only good thing is you're home 2 days every week. The overall pay, tho, I don't think would be even what I'm making now at current company, so scratch that. At least I get home after every run on this job.

I didn't think it would be easy find the job I want. Gemini isn't hiring out of the terminal I would need.  UPI apparently isn't interested in me, for I have never heard back from them.  A bunch of other small outfits out here that aren't paying anything. So, I'm just kind of hopeful that I can get into my own truck - with a lot less miles on it - and work at current employment for a while.  If I'm forced into it, I'll take the chip hauling job and just continue to keep my eyes open for a local gig that actually pays something. 

Smoked pork loin roast, yum. 

Letter to the president (of our company) written.  Read it through and adjusted some things. That was last night, today I'll take a 3rd look, finish it up and send it off. No rush there, I don't even know if it will get read and even if it does, I have no idea whether they will give it any credence, take it seriously or reply to it. Although it would be in their best interests to reply to my demand for immediate payment for the trip made over 2 months ago.  They've had almost a month since I started asking for it and they have done nothing about it.

Meanwhile I went through my own internalizing all of this nonsense this morning.  Got myself riled up, actually, but that's a good thing. Get it out of my system and don't actually take it out on anyone.  I had forgotten about the favoritism in that email to the president, I added some of that to it - but only the stuff I know for sure is occurring. The rest is hearsay. That would be something I would want to ask my manager directly about - is this true? But she will get defensive and angry, from what I've been hearing.

Not that that will stop me from asking tho....  At this point, after all I've been through, I'm not really concerned about any consequences from this company. The worst they can do is fire me.  I'm prepared to deal with that.  I keep flip-flopping on sending out a bunch of applications.  I want to but something in me tells me to wait until I send out this letter and see what happens. And also, to call the lady over the purchase program Monday and see if that is anything that would work in my favor.  Not ready to burn my bridges just yet, is what I'm saying.  Well, unless it blows up I'm not going to burn bridges anyway, not really anything going on here worth burning bridges over.  A person can leave a company without going out in a fiery blaze of glory.

I didn't even do that at Ferguson - that manager certainly deserved, IMO, a good taste of hearing about himself. Instead, I just left that last day.  My manager was hiding in his office - he wouldn't talk to me the final week after I put in my notice.  I have no intention of ever going to back to that company, so I'm kind of proud of myself for keeping my mouth zipped and just letting it go.  He can sit around in eternal self-righteous contempt for me and I am fine with that. They only thing that really perplexed me was these "Christian" salesmen who refused to give me a goodbye handshake.  I was on good terms with them.

I'm thinking of going to the yard today, tho, and getting my stuff out of there. I forgot my new computer is in the bunk.  The truck is locked up  - but they have no choice but to take it into a shop. The mechanic is sick with pneumonia, he isn't going to be around for a while.  I'm thinking I may end up finding myself a new job - I have one in mind already. The pay is equal to what i am taking home now. Not equal to last year, but equal to now.

The job is either around 14 hours a day 5 days a week or less and spread it out over the weekend. Non hazmat, wood chip hauling, they always have ads up for hiring new drivers.

Ok. I just put my name in a data base that puts your name into - probably thousands but at least hundreds - of trucking companies.  One of them showed up as a local job that has excellent equipment and pays almost as much as I'm making per mile now.  Home daily.  I dunno what, if anything, I'm going to pursue, but now I'm seeing plenty of regional runs and even a few local type jobs that would work for me.  That job is a bit far away for a daily commute, the only problem with that. Like 60 miles each way. 

Soooooo.....
Just got back from another Oklahoma trip.
This morning, I did my pretrip inspection and found the tail lights out on the tractor.  Odd.  No other lights out on the entire truck or trailer.  I tried finding the relevant fuse for it.  A huge fuse box, I carefully looked at all of them. Only one of them came close to referring to it, so I took it out - and it fell into the engine compartment somewhere and I couldn't find it. Which caused turn signals to stop working.  Gag.
Had to leave it til the next truckstop - 25 miles away - to get a new fuse. 

While driving to that truckstop, I got a notification on my screen that one of the low beams had stopped working.  What on earth.  That many lights don't just happenstance go out at the same time. 

Then, after replacing the fuse and filling up the tanks at the truck stop, the fuel gauge needle started popping back and forth between empty and full.  Now I am 100% sure there is an electrical problem and there is no way I am going to diagnose that s***.  These "modern" trucks are loaded with electronics and wires.  I don't know how they even begin to try and figure out a problem like that.  Codes come up on their computer when hooking it up to the truck, but they aren't going to pinpoint the problem. It will come up with a bunch of different "possibles". 

Anyway, I texted my manager.  All this stuff.......I hear back from her half an hour later.  Then I got into it.  That ABS light on that trailer has been reported 3 times in the last two weeks and I told the mechanic specifically to his face what was wrong with. "Well that's because he's come down with pneumonia". NO, I replied, he got sick LONG after he knew about this problem.  Then she disappears again and comes back with "well he doesn't have the computer stuff to diagnose the problem." By this time, we weren't texting, we were on the phone.  Well while y'all aren't doing your jobs, that light is on and if  trooper sees it, he can pull me over and write me up for it, it goes onto MY record and points against me. 

Meanwhile, one of the drivers popped up a group text message - separate from the one I had been having personally with manager - he texts: "There are 4 trucks in the yard with expired IFTA stickers!"  I immediately texted, "Yeat, one of them is mine".  Then, my manager gets on there and says "that's part of your pre-trip inspection"  "Yes", I replied, "reported that a long time ago, nothing was done about it".  My manager conveniently disappeared out of the conversation which went on well after that with other drivers chiming in. 

THEN< this safety officer - useless, absolutely useless person that does nothing - sends me and one of the other drivers with old IFTA a message: "grace period ends next week".  I'm like, what on earth is he talking about? Is this some sort of veiled threat? So I asked him What are you talking about? 

IFTA - next week the grace period expires. Great, I replied, y'all do nothing about this stuff and dump this s*** on me?  No thanks.  This is YOUR responsibility, it's already been brought to your attention, y'all did nothing about it, I relieve myself of any responsibility.  This guy gets offended easily, but at this point I was pissed with all of it.  I went into all kinds of safety related issues that he couldn't defend. 

This went on for hours with my manager and the safety dude.  I wasn't backing down. There are not going to shut me up and the safety officer was obviously not liking the idea of me contacting the President and giving him a lengthy report of why drivers are not staying in the company.  They had a high ranking management person out this week asking drivers about that and all of them are always talking about driver retention - but the steps they list do nothing to address problems.  I saw this guy pull into the yard when I was leaving the yard for my last trip. I didn't know who he was but even if I did, I had no time to talk. 

Then, my manager told me that our account with National - a local truck repair shop - had been reinstated, take the truck and trailer there.  Well I already knew National was either closed or would be closing soon and told her that. She said she would call them.  I get a text half an hour later to take the truck and trailer over there.  So I get into the truck, text her I'm rehooking to the trailer and then 30 seconds later get a text that National is no longer open on the weekends.  Well what the hell?  She told me she was calling over there and then apparently just decided to tell me to go there without verifying it - and then - obviously called and found out they aren't open? 

Anyway, the end of the story - is nothing.  Nothing was resolved, I won't be able to take the assigned load to Barnsdall on Monday because - the lights. I will not drive a commercial vehicle with lights out on it.  I did this morning but only because there was no way to get it fixed where it was at.  After getting it back to the yard, that's where it's going to sit.  I told my manager I was going to look in to purchasing a truck through the company program and if that doesn't pan out, I'll be looking for a new job.  I will not waste any more time with this company with this bs, especially since paychecks are getting pretty slim. Money is always the bottom line, if that's missing, bye!  I'm on track to making 25 grand less this year than I made last year.....

Yup, after writing this post, I'm going to write a first draft to the President.  I'll cover everything I can think of and then let it go for a while, come back, read it and then more will pop into my mind.  There is a lot going on here, I know I'll forget some of it on the first round, I'll edit it, add to it, proof read it make sure I'm not getting into "out of line" speech/insubordination, remain respectful but still make quite clear my facts and points.  I'll let it go again - a day or two, I dunno - maybe just a few hours - but then I'll come back to it for a third read and then send it off. Do nothing rash here - and no, telling my manager I'd be looking for another job isn't being rash. I've given that considerable thought, it was time to come out and say that without any ambiguity.  It's time.  I did this with Ferguson, waited too long, but that was pay.  A bad manager, yes, but pay was the biggest issue.  Pay going down here? That's the line. 

Anyway, I'm home, the weather is finally nice for once!  It's been raining here forever.  Today? No rain here. It was misting all the way back from Oklahoma.  I got lucky I never saw a state trooper in either state.  I took a chance but I didn't really have a choice. The best I could do getting pulled over would be explain truthfully that this stuff all just happened.  They could still write you up.  But, if you're respectful you can sometimes get away with stuff. 

Any my Daffodils! They survived the cold after sprouting early and now they are in full bloom! They are beautiful!  I have no plans for today besides working on the letter.  I need to wind down after this nonsense earlier.  No more texts, I got off of it because I was starting to get angry with their replies. Not worth it.  Let it go, go well up the chain of command, get past all these people that are obviously sugar coating what is going on in the rank and file and let the main man hear directly from a driver whether he wants to or not. My future with this company is irrelevant to me at this point, if they no longer want my help, that's fine.  I've learned from my past, time to move on. 

So, I have all this stuff revolving around in my mind, I need to get it written out.  G'day.

Weight stuck at 199.
Better than going up to the 235 I would be at by now - at least - if I hadn't started on this diet many months ago. 

Anyway, I just took the entire Convertible Sofa assembly out of the huge box.  There were gaping holes in the box so I was concerned the thing was damaged, but it appears to be alright.  But, as expected, looks like quite the project to put the thing together.  I'll be working on that today and also some errands needing to be run around town. 

_______________

The whole day is now gone. I ended up just shoving the sofa into my room - in it's folded up state in a corner.  I went out side and got out the blower and started on the front yard.  I spent well over an hour just trying to get the leaves up off of one corner of the lot.  We let it go too long. Several layers of leaves and the bottom layer is wet. There is a HUGE pile of leaves against the house now where I blew all that mess to, replete with snakes flying up in the air as I was disrupting their habitat.  No snakes were harmed in this operation, but if I had the chance, I would have killed them. They got back into the leaves before I could do anything,. 

Anyway, I went to several stores, took over the top mattress of the futon for the dog bed here - I had 2 mattresses - for them over there at the other house. I bought dog beds for Addler and Aspyn when we first started this stuff over there, but they don't have enough cushion for Addler.  He's too big and heavy even for the dog bed version.  The futon mattress is thick and he will enjoy that much more.   And back home, making 2 dinners.  I figured the chicken wouldn't be enough for me to have enough to take with me on the next trip, so I made this weird meatloaf full of ground beef and chorizo.

Somewhere during all of this was my next load sent to me: Alabama.  I had to think about this one for a while.  I haven't been to that plant in at least 8 months.  I have no understanding how she goes about handing out routes, but others that have been there for a while and observed her - her being the manager - have stated that her methodology for handing out routes is quite unfair.  Whatever. this is a decent run. Should only take 2 days, or at most 2 days and back the 3rd morning. 

What's the take? I'm getting sent out, at least for now, after a day home instead of after 2 days home.  My paychecks will pick back up.  But only if it stays this way.  And yes, I'm happy about it even if it means on the road a lot more.  But, this Amarillo run - done in November - that I still haven't been paid for and they are still playing their little games with. I'ma send my manager and this clown in payroll a notice if I am not paid for this run on Friday: Get it on my next paycheck, or expect to hear from upper management.     

And so it is. Other things going on, but I need to get my stuff ready for the morning. 

Uneventful trip to Oklahoma. No detention - didn't expect any - and no delays.  Back to the yard at 9:30 and now on a 34 hour reset  I haven't had a "needed" 34 hour reset in a long time. I get 34 hour resets after every trip - but not because I need one, but because they have me off for 2 days.  My paychecks have been reflecting that time off.  Now? They brought the loaner drivers back, which was stupid.  I hate to talk negatively about work all the time, but that is literally all I hear from every single other driver, frequently.  They want to tell me their frustrations because they are afraid for whatever reasons to express those sentiments to management.

As I said in another post on here a while back, I have no such reservations.  I don't get disrespectful, but I will speak my mind about situations that IMO are egregious and shorting people on paychecks? That's egregious and incompetence.  I don't believe it's intentional at all - it's just the level of "quality" that we have with this new company and it's employees that do the paperwork.  They just plain, fat suck at their jobs.  And my manager?  Nice lady, but we've all come to the conclusion that she has literally no clue what she's doing.  And, possibly, she doesn't care. 

I'm off tomorrow and I'm going to continue to peruse available local jobs.  I'm really local for a truly local gig - where you're home every day or night.  I mean, the President of my company may actually care, but he can't run the whole company If you have people working for you that don't give a s*** about their roles in the company, the company is eventually doomed, especially in this industry where truck drivers will leave in a heartbeat for something better.  The problem with local gigs is I have had a taste of good money and that would be hard to walk away from.  I can find other jobs going out of town all the time like I am now and be in comparable yearly salary, but the good local jobs are hard to come by and are gobbled up quickly. You really have to keep on top of the listings to find them and you'd better drop everything you're doing if you want a real chance of landing one of them. 

I'll keep trying.  Meanwhile, my new futon is in. I'm not doing that today, I simply don't feel like it.  Tomorrow I'll take it out of the box and inspect - there is a huge, gaping hole in the box and several smaller ones. If it's not in perfect condition, they can either come get it or give me a partial refund.  I paid good money for this thing, there is no way I will settle for anything less than perfect condition unless they agree to give me some of the money back. Which I doubt they will do.....

In fact, it doesn't look like it's going to rain tomorrow, if it doesn't, I'm doing the leaves.  I was half expecting the Daffodils to have bloomed by the time I got back today. The flowers are showing some of the yellow, but so far they aren't sprouting.  I mean, if they're going to sprout early, I at least want t see them before it might freeze again and ruin them.

___________________

Some days, I go overboard on eating. Not carbs usually but calories.  Today was one of those days. I ate a whole pint of the low carb ice cream plus a bunch of pork rinds, plus a steak dinner and I ate at Waffle house.  It's probably 3 to 4 thousand calories I ate today lol.  Well, once in a while isn't going to hurt. 

I just got done eating a pint of chocolate ice cream.  It was ooooh sooooo delicious.
It was also only 6 grams of carbs for the entire pint : ) I've been wanting to do that and tonight was the night.  I paid enough money for that stuff, might as well indulge.  I have other flavors as well. Mint, cookie dough - of which I've had some already and it's quite delicious replete with large chunks of cookie dough in it - I think another flavor I can't remember what now.

I think the test strip was bad or something, I took a reading this morning and it showed nothing.  But, I just did it again and almost in the moderate range, the best range to be in.  So who knows?  But I'm still under 20 carbs today even with that pint cause' that reading this morning startled me and I ate nothing but fat and meat today, zero carbs, zero sugars. 

Umm well anyway, I got back to the yard today- I'm done with the 4 day trip to and basically unleashed. The truck still has all of those warning lights showing - after what, a year now? - it's back to having the cruise control not working more often than not.  Let me tell you, when you're sitting behind the wheel for as many hours a day as I do, you need that cruise control to work.  I've gotten to the point now that I have trained my left leg how to use the accelerator and braking because I can't use my right leg on that foot pedal all day long.  But I flatly told my manager and the mechanic who happened to be in there that I was drawing the line. 

The manager informed me I am going back out tomorrow.  Okay, where? Baker.  Back and forth for a while - you have Brownsville runs? Yes I got 47 of them for this month.  Well send me to Brownsville! But, she's handing out the routes as the drivers roll in.  She has no sense of fairness, actually, when handing these runs out . She will give a person back to back Cheneire runs if it works out that way in the order they come in, instead of ensuring that a driver get a good run along with a bad run.  Well whatever, I'm going to Oklahoma tomorrow morning after just getting back from Ohio today. 

A bad thing? No, my paychecks have been terrible, I'd take back to back work for quite a while just to get caught back up.  34 hour resets are mandatory, so those would be my saving grace.  In fact, now that I think about it, I'll need a 34 hour reset after these 2 trips.  I'll be off for 2 days - legitimately off - not off because there isn't any work. 

But today, after getting home........another driver called me.  What's up?  He went off for a full 5 minutes of bitching about the manager, the job and getting shafted on pay - that will piss off any worker at any employer. He's had the same problems I have in getting shorted on pay - tho I have also been shorted an entire paycheck.  And I'm still waiting to get paid for a run from last year.  He stated he knows the President of the this new company personally - and gave me his personal cell phone number.  LMAO!!  Umm, yeah, that's bad news for my manager and that idiot payroll person in Amarillo. 

It was a rather long conversation not worth going into all of it, but the end of the story he gave me this dude's number and his blessing to tell this President that  he gave me your number.  Well, I have a lot of things I'd like to point out to this individual if I ever do call and actually do get his ear for a few moments of time.  I'm not acting on that right away - but I will if more of this nonsense occurs.

So that's it for now.  Off to Barnsdall tomorrow, be home on Sunday morning/early afternoon.