Monday
I was sitting in my kitchen last night at the computer, contemplating finishing up an entry for Sunday when my cellphone started ringing. I looked at the name that popped up on the screen: Boe, one of my best friends on the planet.
I answered in my normal way when talking to him but was not greeted by Boe. Instead, it was a lady's voice on the other end of the phone. She wanted to know who I was, which I thought strange to ask a person that you just called. This is ben. She declared that she is Boe's daughter.
I got a bad feeling about this. NO-ONE uses Boe's phone except Boe. She proceeded to tell me that Boe had passed away on New Year's Eve day. It took a minute for that to sink in. The thought of losing one of the few, real friends I have on this earth? About floored me.
She went into the story - he had a heart attack, followed by a stroke. They took him to the hospital but, it was a done deal. This guy was one of those types of people that everyone liked. No-one could hate him. I thought about the life-long pain he had suffered at the hands of a drunken Army Sargeant - the man got into a 10-wheeler, on of those big things the Army uses for personnel and such - put it in reverse and proceed to run over several men sleeping in a tent and also over Boe's leg.
Boe has suffered pain ever since then, some 50 years ago I'm thinking. I thought how he must feel right now, freed from that broken body.
It was a few years ago, something like 2 or 3 I'm guessing, that I started seeing Boe with a Bible in his hand. He started learning scripture and really fell in love with the Lord. It was almost shocking to see that man with a Bible, but it gladdened my heart to see him doing such and, over time, starting to be able to come up with Scripture. I only throw that in there because I know he is with the Lord, which means, at least from my view of it, he is in a FAR better place right now than any of us mortals living here on the earth.
That doesn't help his family, of course, especially his wife. They were married some 40 years. Or more. I'll have to find out. It was a long time, I know that.
I was sitting in my kitchen last night at the computer, contemplating finishing up an entry for Sunday when my cellphone started ringing. I looked at the name that popped up on the screen: Boe, one of my best friends on the planet.
I answered in my normal way when talking to him but was not greeted by Boe. Instead, it was a lady's voice on the other end of the phone. She wanted to know who I was, which I thought strange to ask a person that you just called. This is ben. She declared that she is Boe's daughter.
I got a bad feeling about this. NO-ONE uses Boe's phone except Boe. She proceeded to tell me that Boe had passed away on New Year's Eve day. It took a minute for that to sink in. The thought of losing one of the few, real friends I have on this earth? About floored me.
She went into the story - he had a heart attack, followed by a stroke. They took him to the hospital but, it was a done deal. This guy was one of those types of people that everyone liked. No-one could hate him. I thought about the life-long pain he had suffered at the hands of a drunken Army Sargeant - the man got into a 10-wheeler, on of those big things the Army uses for personnel and such - put it in reverse and proceed to run over several men sleeping in a tent and also over Boe's leg.
Boe has suffered pain ever since then, some 50 years ago I'm thinking. I thought how he must feel right now, freed from that broken body.
It was a few years ago, something like 2 or 3 I'm guessing, that I started seeing Boe with a Bible in his hand. He started learning scripture and really fell in love with the Lord. It was almost shocking to see that man with a Bible, but it gladdened my heart to see him doing such and, over time, starting to be able to come up with Scripture. I only throw that in there because I know he is with the Lord, which means, at least from my view of it, he is in a FAR better place right now than any of us mortals living here on the earth.
That doesn't help his family, of course, especially his wife. They were married some 40 years. Or more. I'll have to find out. It was a long time, I know that.
I'll never forget the way I came to meet Boe. I was living in that trailer park - he and his family were, too. Some ladies in the park had started a homeowner's association to take on park management which was extremely abusive to everyone. They needed a person to take the president's position and had approached me about it. I wasn't particularly interested. I asked them to find someone else. They told me that I was the only one they knew of that had the guts to stand up to that bastard of a manager.
I had already stood up to him and his threats several times and had not backed down. I took the position, we scheduled a meeting in the main hall and I had flyers sent out to everyone in the park. Boe showed up, standing in the back, talking with another man, basically saying what a crock this meeting was and how it wasn't going to do any good at all.
He wouldn't quiet down when the meeting started, so I had to ask him to tone down or please leave. He made some sort of comment, but by the end of the meeting, he had a different tune. Boe and I started meeting together and going over landlord and tenant rules and regulations as put forth by the state of Arizona. We then started delving into all kinds of legal issues that the park was posing in their actions towards many tenants.
We became really good friends. He was the man that called me on 9/11 - I was sound asleep when he called - and asked if I was "watching this?". What? The TV. I asked what channel. He said ANY channel. Turned it on and there was the first tower smoking with a gaping hole in it. As Boe and I discussed how that POSSIBLY could be an accident - how does a professional airline pilot just somehow not miss a gigantic building? The second jet slammed into the other tower. We then knew there was no accident going on here, this was an act of terrorism. You all remember the skies after that - empty.
But, this is about Boe, not 911. He was a great man. Even in the worst situations, he was able to keep a smile on his face and an upbeat attitude. You can't replace a friend like that, you just can't.
The daughter told me that my name and number weren't in his phone. I said I had called him last time he was over at my place, like 2 or 3 weeks ago and he had saved it. Nope, she said, it was gone and his wife would not have the phone shut off until I called, as they had no other way to contact me. Josie is his wife's name, a beautiful, lovely lady and I'm sure hurting right now. I couldn't talk to her last night, they had given her a sleeping pill to get to sleep because, of course, the grief had overcome her.
It's hard for me just because he was one of the few friends I have left. I mean, I have plenty of acquaintences, lots of - dunno what you label them - half friends - I just don't think we make too many real, close and personal friends in life. I dunno, but the next coming days are certainly going to give me cause to think about all of this going on in my life. I don't take the death of close friends or loved ones very well, I just don't. I have been asked to come to the funeral, of course I will be there, don't know yet what day it's going to be. He is going to be buried in a veteran's type of cemetary somewhere in north Phoenix.
I don't really have anything else to say. I just wanted to pop a hello out to my friend, I know he's up there.
ben
I had already stood up to him and his threats several times and had not backed down. I took the position, we scheduled a meeting in the main hall and I had flyers sent out to everyone in the park. Boe showed up, standing in the back, talking with another man, basically saying what a crock this meeting was and how it wasn't going to do any good at all.
He wouldn't quiet down when the meeting started, so I had to ask him to tone down or please leave. He made some sort of comment, but by the end of the meeting, he had a different tune. Boe and I started meeting together and going over landlord and tenant rules and regulations as put forth by the state of Arizona. We then started delving into all kinds of legal issues that the park was posing in their actions towards many tenants.
We became really good friends. He was the man that called me on 9/11 - I was sound asleep when he called - and asked if I was "watching this?". What? The TV. I asked what channel. He said ANY channel. Turned it on and there was the first tower smoking with a gaping hole in it. As Boe and I discussed how that POSSIBLY could be an accident - how does a professional airline pilot just somehow not miss a gigantic building? The second jet slammed into the other tower. We then knew there was no accident going on here, this was an act of terrorism. You all remember the skies after that - empty.
But, this is about Boe, not 911. He was a great man. Even in the worst situations, he was able to keep a smile on his face and an upbeat attitude. You can't replace a friend like that, you just can't.
The daughter told me that my name and number weren't in his phone. I said I had called him last time he was over at my place, like 2 or 3 weeks ago and he had saved it. Nope, she said, it was gone and his wife would not have the phone shut off until I called, as they had no other way to contact me. Josie is his wife's name, a beautiful, lovely lady and I'm sure hurting right now. I couldn't talk to her last night, they had given her a sleeping pill to get to sleep because, of course, the grief had overcome her.
It's hard for me just because he was one of the few friends I have left. I mean, I have plenty of acquaintences, lots of - dunno what you label them - half friends - I just don't think we make too many real, close and personal friends in life. I dunno, but the next coming days are certainly going to give me cause to think about all of this going on in my life. I don't take the death of close friends or loved ones very well, I just don't. I have been asked to come to the funeral, of course I will be there, don't know yet what day it's going to be. He is going to be buried in a veteran's type of cemetary somewhere in north Phoenix.
I don't really have anything else to say. I just wanted to pop a hello out to my friend, I know he's up there.
ben
8 comments:
so sorry, Ben... {hugs}
Sympathies Ben.
Thanks, Dorrie and Fin.
ben
Tuesday
The funeral for my friend is on Thursday. It is going to be a full military style thing with 21-gun salute, flag - I have never been to one of those kinds of funerals, don't really know what to expect.
I spoke with Josie (his wife) last night on the phone. She stood there and watched him die as emergency workers tried to save his life. It was simply his time to go. I don't know how else to put it, when it's time, it's time.
I was not a particularly happy person at work yesterday, either. Just because I didn't have time to process all of it. I got the news the night before JUST before going to bed and then get up for work the next morning. Life goes on, yes, still, when you have known a person for some 16 years and became close friends, it isn't something that you just dismiss as if it were a melted Hostess cupcake and throw it in the trash.
Change the tune here, I am not really that much down at this point, he was a good man and he lived a full life, he is with the Lord, it isn't a bad thing where he's at, just the people that are left behind have to deal with the emotional issues of separation and bidding goodbyes.
I was standing next to the hummingbird feeder a few days ago when one of them came humming up to the feeder. I was maybe 2 feet away from that feeder and that bird. He became so relaxed he sat on the ledge and perched instead of hovering. I find this fascinating, birds usually want to be nowhere near humans. Well, then, another hummingbird flew to the top of the 6 foot chain link fence and perched there, looking at the feeder with the other bird.
Now it gets dicey. Yet ANOTHER hummingbird zoomed right past the one on the fence, who immediately took off after it. A minute later, it came back and perched on the fence again. What happened next I wish I could have gotten on video: the bird on the fence swooped down on the bird on the feeder, poked it with it's bill and then took off. I heard this little squealing noise come from the "injured" bird who was RIGHT on the tail of that bird, chasing it away.
I don't know if it got revenge or not - they fly so fast they are out of my yard and down the street before you know what's going on. It wasn't 60 seconds later and it was back on the feeder, drinking away.
An amazing thought that these birds are, apparently, territorial, at least over "their" feeder and that they are willing to fight over it!!
My answer may be to get another feeder and locate it somewhere else, maybe on the other side of the house. Feeders are cheap, the mix to make the sugar liquid is cheap, nothing about money here. I would like to hang one right by the sliding door in the kitchen and and see if any of them will visit it.
Politics as usual. That's all I see in any of this. A vote is going to be forced on the repeal of the health care bill. I dunno that that's going to happen, I think it's more of a symbolic act to be used as weaponry in the next elections.
Our company just switched health care providers, going from Cygna to Anthem Blue Cross. I was not particularly happy about the switch, I now have to find a new doctor. I have had the same doctor for a number of years now and he was the kind of person that made a visit not so over-bearing. So, go to Anthem's site, pick a name out of the hat and hope I get a good one? Gag. Our company said it was a cost-reducing measure. Well, I'm glad to have coverage, so I can't complain too much, though the premiums are going up again. Pretty much every year the monthly premium is higher and higher. Can't afford to not have coverage so I pay it regardless of how much it costs. I am also covering my son and probably will be well into his "adult" life. My parents dumped me when I was 19 and I thought that a - petty - thing to do. I will be doing no such thing with my boy - until he find something that gives him his own coverage or if he ends up in the military - I will keep him on my coverage as long as I have coverage to extend to him.
Work day approaches. A couple of small orders in the system.
G'day.
ben
Ben: I'm so sorry to hear about your friend. Take care and Happy New Year.
Terri
I'm sorry to read this Ben. There is never a replacement for a friendship.
Best,
Bobby
Thanks, Terri and Bobby - I'm getting pretty good with this now - my beliefs have me knowing that he is with the Lord, out of that miserable, pain-filled body he was in and free!!
His wife of 46 years - totally different story. Praying for her.
ben
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