Caleb

So for a glimpse of time, I got to see my son.  I mean, he's spending the night here but he left to go visit mom and some of his friends are throwing a party for him.  We talked about the Bible and God.  That's what we always do. We talk about the things that are going on in our lives and how they relate to - the Bible and God.  Cause' that's what interests both of us and we both see the Bible is a treasure trove, full of gems and full of truths and full of revelation.

We were deep into a discussion but he started looking at the clock so I knew it was time for him to get moving.  Inwardly, very reluctantly, I let him go.  Outwardly, good to see you son, love you.  Yeah, I'll get to see him for a short time tomorrow morning but then that's it for quite a while.  Yes, I miss him something fierce, though it doesn't really hit me until  - I see him again and and this time it's such a short time that he was here.

But a short time is better than no time.

We pulled out Hebrews 11 and talked about that for quite a while and then he said, well, I guess  this is the last time I will see you for ---- years.  I'm sure the look on my face wasn't one of, gee won't that be wonderful.  No, I said what on earth are you talking about?  Well you'll be in Texas and I can't afford to get out there.  I've already told him several times I would fly him out there and back to wherever if he wanted to come visit.  But I said it again.  Oh, cool.  I said yes, aren't you coming back to town after you are done in Hawaii?

He didn't know. He doesn't feel like he is supposed to be here for any length of time which is totally fine with me. I just ended this with: wherever you are, I will get you out to Texas and you can stay as long or short a stay as you like.

Cool, he replied. I said and maybe have you come out when the kids are on break from school so you can not only meet them but maybe minister some truth to them.  Not that I won't, but never hurts to get it from other sources that are like-minded.  Well, Caleb is out and about now.  With his mom by now I am sure.  Just a very tight schedule for him, I understand and it really is a blessing that I could spend any time with him at all -- but I am his father and I love him and it still kinda is hard to be only able to see him for a few hours and then gone.  Well he has to be up early tomorrow for his flight back to Hawaii so I will see him for a little while in the morning, but if he's staying out half the night with mom and friends, he will be too tired to do much talking of anything.

And I am sick with this respiratory junk and mornings are the hardest part.  He is done with his 1 year commitment to RevHi in August and after that coming back to Phoenix to visit if nothing else.  Regardless of what he is doing, hopefully he will be able to find some time to come out and visit me/us/my new family.  Still that's at least 5 months probably longer before I get to see him again.  I know, suck it up.  Not  I don't subscribe to the theory that men should have no feelings or never show them. I don't, frankly, give a damn what anyone thinks about my showing my feelings to the people that I love and if that includes some tears, then so beit.

Time for bed. Monday's coming soon.  Huge orders that have not been pulled.  I know because I was at work on Saturday to get some things and looked in the truck routing system and found all that stuff in there - stuff that wasn't there before I left on Friday.

G'nite.

ben