Thursday, August 26, 2010

Thursday

Thursday




Apparently I forgot when I got home yesterday from work to post that morning's post from this comments section to it's own post.



Oh well. The only reason I do it this way now is because I don't always feel like writing in the afternoon and now I can't log into my Blogger account at work, soooo, this is the only remedy.



Anyway, I guess my notices worked because the other tenant - of whom I was prepared to hand a 5-day notice today and already it had it prepared and ready to go - handed me over the rest of the rent.



Apparently, her paying me the rent is on her time, not mine. I have to wait every 2 weeks for her to get paid. So, the rent that is due on the 1st won't get paid until the 8th.



We got to talking. She wants to go to college and went to some community college over in Gilbert. Her parents and her both decided it was too far away. I suggested a community college that is all of 2 miles from my house. She leaves, comes back 2 hours later and informs me she has enrolled in college, lol, that the military is paying for it and when she starts, the military is also going to be giving her over $1,300 per month for living expenses. I'm telling you, it MUST be NICE!!



She then declared that she will be getting her own place after she starts getting her money. I asked her to please give me enough advance notice when she intends on doing that. She replied that she will be staying for a while until she can get some stuff paid off.



That's as much conversation as I've gotten out of that woman as I have had since she moved in. Literally. The only reason I got it was because she locked her keys in her car, couldn't get into her room, etc etc etc. I offered to open the room, she said NO!! Made me curious as to what, if anything, she has going on in there that she would get so defensive about having her room opened for her?



Well, whatever. I don't hear loud banging noises and I don't think she has someone else living in there, so, no big deal.



Meanwhile, the turtles. It's becoming rather comical. They are SO afraid that they just dive into the water whenever I walk up to the pond and then start swimming up against the side of the pond, apparently trying to get out! I decided to wear my straw hat, like I do with the fish, so that I can be more easily identified by these creatures.



Uhhh, well anyway. I have been trying to get something done on my mortgage - lower the interest rate again, refi - whatever. I can't get another modification, they told me yesterday, because I am not behind in my payments. Well and freaking good that is. So, what, let the payments go for 3 months and the call them back? They suggested a refi which I KNEW I wouldn't qualify for because the loan to value is WAY off kilter at this point.



I called the bank anyway, who called me back. We had a nice little discussion, didn't bother to apply, no need to, it wouldn't have been approved and would have been a waste of mine and the bank's time. I'm guessing the house is 30 to 40k upside down now. Yeah, somewhere in that range. It's a very difficult decision to make in deciding whether to walk away or stay.

August 26, 2010 5:59 AM

Anonymous said...

Well, it isn't that hard. I mean, a short-sale is the best option if the lender will go for it, but I think offers would be low and the lender might not like it. If I walk, then eventually I have to go bankrupt. If I stay, how many years or even decades before the house is worth at least as much as the mortgage that's on it? One thing I hope I never have to do again is go bankrupt. Once through that misery was more than enough.



I'm just going to sit on that one a while, think it through, make a decision eventually. I hate the neighborhood I am living is what the real deal is. A lot of the people are just trailer trash, literally. Dump garbage out their side doors as if their entire property is nothing but a landfill and trust me, some of them LOOK like a landfill.



OFF of that subject that is AGES old, unfortunately and gets me going every time I start thinking about it. Really - WHY can't they just keep their properties CLEAN at the very least, even if they have no landscaping? TRASH.



That's life in my fast lane, what about yours? Oh, the trailer tenants. Well the guy has been working outside and now inside as well. Cleaning out the utility room - looks very nice. I needed some acetone to remove glue sticking on the molding from - yes my - leaving tape on there. I was painting and forgot about it. He has done so much work and it's the end of the month (they are broke) I handed him a $20, told him to go buy the acetone and then keep the change. Acetone doesn't cost that much. So, he's going to get that junk off of there, paint it and it will look wonderful again.



I have seen 4 different weather forecasts for this coming weekend with wildly different predictions. It's CRAZY. How do these people come up with this stuff? One says Saturday will be 98 degrees, another says it will be 107. Whatever. I mean, I could just throw out a guess and that would be as close as anything they are coming up with.



This is crazy, NOW they have TOMORROW'S high at 100 - 2 days ago they said it was going to be 109!! ROFL!!! Gee, I think I want to be a weather forecaster, pick numbers out of a hat and that's what the temp will be!!



I put an ad on Craigslist for pond plants - either free or cheap. One guy wrote back that he would hand me a slew of plants for $20 including water lilies. Hmmm. Well, water lilies aren't cheap and I could use several more of those plants right now. Thing is, people thin out their ponds all the time and some of those people just chuck the stuff in the trash. THAT is who I am trying to get to in my ad - yes, folks, I'll come get them and get them when you're doing the thinning process. Think I'll wait instead of spending money. Plus, there is a pond meeting in 16 days I think it is and people bring plants from their ponds and give them away.



Okay, so, the Taliban is going to attack aid workers in Pakistan. To me, that is just plain cowardice, not to mention stupid. Those people are bring food and medical supplies and such to those people that have lost homes and have no access to food because of the flooding disaster going on over there. I think if those people do attack aid workers that there will be a special place in HELL reserved for them for engaging in killing anyone that is over there that is trying to HELP THEIR PEOPLE.



Work day almost here. This, so far, has been the slowest week yet. Work is so unbelievably difficult to make it through a day when there is literally nothing to do.



Anyway, hope you have a great day!



ben

Wednesday

Wednesday




It was virtually guaranteed that McCain was going to beat Hayworth yesterday - even though Hayworth predicted yesterday that he was going to beat McCain in a "landslide victory that will go down in the history books".



I never used to give much credence to polls, but I "came around the corner" and figured they are usually pretty close - in this case, the polls were showing McCain FAR ahead of Hayworth, the polls in this case didn't lie. I'll take McCain over Hayworth ANY day - let Hayworth go sit back at the radio desk and do his little daily talk show.



As for Governor Brewer, I didn't even look at the polls, no brainer: she's going to take it and she did. The Immigration bill that she signed into law made her WILDLY popular in Arizona despite what the loudmouths are saying all over the place. It brought the border, border security and immigration problems back into the limelight and has made it a significant sticking point for the upcoming November elections.



Terry Goddard is Brewer's opponent. I can say one thing with certainty: If Goddard wins in November, I will be wanting to leave the state of Arizona. That may not be feasible or happen, but I won't want to live here under his "leadership". The mas is a FUBAR, and clusterfreak, a walking jumble of nothingness and hot air.



Okay, enough of that. I'll donate $20 to Brewer's campaign fund just to know that I did something to back up my feelings about it. I also voted yesterday - even IF I figured the election was going to turn out as it did with the candidates I am interested in. People who mouth off about how our government is being run but who don't bother to vote? SHUT UP.



Tenants. Always issues with tenants. Well, I came out this morning and found an envelope with my name on it in front of my computer. I knew who that was from and figured what was inside. Money, yes. For being unemployed I'll give her some kudos for coming up with money. She is getting unemployment but child support is deducted from it, leaving not that much left over (and certainly not enough to even cover the weekly rent).



She must like my place or she wouldn't be trying so hard to get the money to stay there. I'm not like a lot of landlords renting rooms who don't want you to have ANYONE over. No boy/girlfriends, no family, no friends, nothing. They give a hard time to their tenants and I imagine that people like to get out of those situations.

August 25, 2010 5:58 AM

Anonymous said...

I don't care - for the most part - what people do in their bedrooms as long as noise levels are kept down. When noise levels go up, then I start knocking on doors: Please turn down the volume on your activities, the rest of the house does not want to hear about it, thank you.



I mostly do not have to do that. The other lady that I gave the "friendly notice" to, 2 days ago, has not replied and is hiding. She has been in her bedroom and doesn't come out -until I have gone to bed/work/whatever. She IS working so I don't understand the problem here. However, the next notice, which will be delivered tomorrow if I don't get money from her, will not be so friendly, it will be just a blunt, 5-day pay or quit notice. Pay up or get out, plain and simple. She has a large bedroom, satellite tv, access to the internet, room is nice and cool with AC, I am definitely providing a service and I definitely do not overcharge.



So there.



Okay, I tried to see the turtles this morning, but - the sun is coming up later now and it isn't light out that early. Well, I trust they are okay. They are in for another scare, I am guessing, when I come to the pond today and look down in there and see what they're up to. Probably, they will be on the dry area and probably, when they see me, they are going to plop into the water and hide at the bottom. Yes, well, they are going to HAVE to get used to me is all I can say about that.



The 6 new goldfish in other pond seem to be doing okay. Well, they haven't died and don't show signs of dying, so I will hope they are going to survive in there.



Antonio, the smaller goldfish that the family brought over last weekend, is doing quite well in his new environment. He apparently loves the "open space" that a 7 and a half foot long by almost 5 feet pond gives him as opposed to the 10 gallon aquarium he was in. In fact, that pond is doing so well I am going to hate to "shut it down" when the time comes to get that big pond going.



I will transfer the water from that pond into the big pond - fish and plants as well. Then I will have to decide what I want to do with that one. I am thinking that it isn't all such a bad idea that maybe one of these ponds just stays an above ground setup - and that one seems the perfect one to do it with.



The issue - besides digging out that hard ground - is what to do with all that dirt. That is a larger pond and will also prove to be a difficult task to find a good place to put the dirt and not have the area I am putting it in look - bad. So, I'm thinking of moving it from where it is, yes, but put it somewhere up against the side of the house and start anew with it.



Well, that's enough for one entry. There is, again, nothing in our truck routing system, which really is no fun at all. There is something for tomorrow in there, yes, but that doesn't help with today. It will be a long seven and a half hours is all I can say about that.



G'day.



ben

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Turtles

The turtles are absolutely terrified. 
I had read that they probably will be for even up to several days worth.
I did not expect them to be THAT mortified, however. 
But, thinking about it:
I just took 2 reptiles that were living in a glass aquarium for 4-1/2 years.
Living in an artificial envirnonment in a teenager's bedroom, they knew nothing more
than a log and water.  That was ALL that was in that aquarium.  There were no plants,
no fish, nothing but water, gravel on the bottom and a log in the middle.  I mean - really.
Umm, well I intend on at least trying to put plants in there.  They say turtles may - or may not -
eat them. 
Well, anyway, I took them out of their box, put them on the dry area I made for them, they just sat there,
looking at me.  One of them jumped into the water and went to the bottom.  The other did the same.
They wanted nothing to do with me, lol. 
I stood there and they were clawing at the side of the pond, apparently trying to get away from me.
I decided to make some hiding places for them so they might settle down a bit - of which they went directly for. 
So that's that.  I just left them - other things I wanted to do and I figure I will spend more time tomorrow out there and see if they are "coming out of their shells" a little bit.
No, I am sitting here waiting on primary results.  Supposedly the first rounds of results will be given out at 8:00pm  which is in less than 5 minutes.
ben

HOT Day

There were just six of them.  6 pallets.  Loaded with heavy fittings for ductile iron pipe.  A contractor returned all of it  and now we are sending it back to the manfucturer, it is oddball stuff that we can't resell and are not going to just keep in "inventory" forever.  The manufacturer will charge a 25% restock fee, but at least the contractor gets something back out of it.

Well, my job was to make all of that stuff fit for transporting on LTL trucks.  LTL is simply a term for less than load - not a whole truckload.  You see them all over - Conway/Saia/Bestway all kinds of companies specialize in picking up materials that are not a full truckload but are FAR too heavy or large for UPS or Fedex to pick up in one of those vans they drive around.

Well, I have ample experience with these freight companies.  The stuff gets moved around endlessly until it makes it to it's destination.  It doesn't just get moved around, it gets bashed into by other freight and crashed into by forklifts and hand trucks.  So, I had to really package the stuff well.

WEll, it was 110 degrees out there and that's in the shade.  Banding the stuff up and then walking around each pallet endless times with shrink wrap to entomb it in plastic and then tape it up and the move it back outside?  About killed me.  I had another heat headache, I HATE those.  I will freely admit that this summer has totally kicked my @$$.  I have never experienced so much heat with the humidity levels at what they are for such an extended period of time.  111 degrees with up to 50% humidity?  It's like being tortured.  I'm not trying to be funny, either, it is literally HELL out there right now. 

I got done with that and felt like passing out.  Even my manager took one look at me and asked if I was okay.  I didn't say anything, what's to say?  It totally SUCKS outside during the daytime, especially for those of us that have to work in it.

I went on a delivery run after that - something finally came up and I decided today, after going through all of that, would be the day to cheat and totally blow the diet.  Ohhhhh, and I did.  No, not the sub sandwich this morning that had ham, loaded with veggies and topped with a little vinegar, mustard and pepper.  Nope, that's been a staple of this diet, actually.  It's the only fast food I can find that has low calorie and low fat offerings. 

Ahhhh, no, I went for the Dairy Queen Blizzard.  A LARGE one.  German Chocolate.  I hadn't had one of those  - I dunno, in a year?  I stay away from ice cream because I love the stuff so much.  You wanna put on a nice gut, just eat ice cream every day.  It was heaven in a cup.  I devoured it - too fast actually, should have taken a little more time and enjoyed it a little more cause' honey, there ain't gonna be no more of those offerings for quite a long time.  You know, I didn't feel bad at all after I ate it.  I thought - I have done so well making good eating choices and literally shoving temptation back down my throat and not giving in SO many other times, I thought it was a treat well-deserved. 

I think next month I will do something out-of-diet, but it won't be ice cream.  Instead I'll have a meal of something that I haven't been eating and just forget about the calories.  I am totally resolved to continue eating the way I have been since I started this diet for a long time to come, I don't have a problem with what I am eating because I happen to like the stuff.  I DO need to find some new recipes, I will be spending some time doing that soon enough.

In 2 hours I go to get the turtles.  Never had turtles as a kid, I think it might be cool.  But, if I end up hating it, I can always sell them on Craigslist, those kinds of turtles don't last long on there, people buy them up if you are giving a good price.  They actually had posted these turtles for sale before I even saw them, but contacted me via email - they don't really want money for them they want a good home.  I promise to give them a good home while they are here and if I end up liking having turtles around, they will be here until I either lose the house to foreclosure (hope not, but reality is reality) or they die, or I move - though if I move and it is voluntary (not foreclosure) to another property that I would buy, all animals - dogs/fish/turtles/some humans - would go with me.  These are preformed ponds and come out of the ground easily.  It's DIGGING the ground out FOR them that's the pain the - rear.  No, coming OUT of the ground is simply the act of removing living water creatures - put them in temporary quarters - take out plants - temp quarters as well, pump out the water, grab a hold of the liner and walaah - it comes right out. 

Uhhh, gotta go out and feed the fishies : )

ben

Tuesday

Tuesday




Yesterday afternoon, I found an order that our main branch was taking out that is supposed to be for our branch. The trip includes going to Tucson and then up to the mines in the mountains. My attempt to thwart the action - failed :(



The reasoning was that there was going to be stuff in our system to do locally today, we can't be traipsing around the countryside. Well, there is nothing in our system - as there was nothing in the system yesterday before I left - and now - nothing to do when work starts besides attempting to invent things to do, as always.



Vote for J.D Hayworth or John McCain - that is the question.

Easy one there. We ALREADY got rid of Hayworth once and the ads McCain has run against him? Hayworth couldn't refute and actually ended having to apologize for his part in running ads in Florida that bilked people out of a lot of money.



I'd RATHER vote for someone else - but there is no-one else besides some dude I have never heard of and won't be voting for.



Anyway, I have my pond set up for the free turtles. A small pump that I already had, an aerator and that's it besides the pond I also already have. This one is going to be an experiment. If they turn out to be too much work and trouble, I can sell the suckers for $25 or so a piece and be done with them.



Tenants.

1st tenant I was going to hand an eviction notice to yesterday stated that she was coming up with enough money to cover at least one week's worth of rent. Okay, well, I want to see that no later than the end of today or - the eviction notice will be handed to her.



2cd tenant - avoiding me. I gave her the friendly notice - well I put it under her door, she was home and never did leave yesterday. She doesn't come out when she's home except to use the bathroom so I don't ever really see her. If I don't see the money in the next few days, it's going to be an eviction notice. Actually, in 2 days so I can have her out by the first of next month. She has a job, I don't know what her problem is and I noted on the notice that if she is going to continue to have problems paying on time, she needs to discuss with me the situation.



The only "guaranteed" money I ever get is from the ex-Marine, and that only because he gets money from the military every month. Whatever the case, dealing with deadbeat tenants gets old.



Work day is here, gotta get offa here.



G'day.



ben

Monday, August 23, 2010

Monday

FINALLY came into work and found something to do in the truck routing system. I was NOT looking forward to having to attempt to invent things to do all day long as was the case for most of last week, sans one day when I was running around all day long.




I am simply not the kind of person that wants to sit around doing nothing at work. It gets boring, monotonous and I start to get lethargic.



I placed an ad in Craigslist a while back asking for "things for the pond". Instead of constantly scouring the ads for people shutting their ponds down and either giving stuff away or selling very cheap, I thought I'd just put the ad out there and see what happens.



Yesterday, a family contacted me through the ad saying that their son is going to college, they have to red eared slider turtles, do you want them? I had to think about that. What do turtles eat? How much does it cost to keep them? I started looking it up - they LIKE to eat fish and even some vegetables, but the main thing that keeps them healthy is some prefabricated food that you buy at the store, much like the Koi pellets I have to buy about once a month (at $6.00 per large can, I am not spending very much money keeping all of those fish).



I have an extra pond and was thinking I could put them in there and see what happens. Keep them from the goldfish - definitely far away from them, I don't want them crawling aroud my yard, finding the other ponds and then having dinner on a goldfish or Koi. That's kind of the dilemna - where to put the pond so I know they won't be bothering the fish. The only answer I can come up with is out front where I was going to put one of those ponds anyway.



The front of my house is starting to look like a tropical rain forest or something. There is so much trees and vegetation - well - it's really the effect I was looking for anyway. Most of the sissoo trees that I have planted around the property - over 20 of them - have taken off and growing like giant weeds - that includes the trees out front.



I'll have to clear a place for the pond - it's a small one I have no intention of putting a large pond out front and taking up precious space for trees and shrubbery - but I do have a place in mind.

August 23, 2010 5:59 AM

Anonymous said...

One problem, however, is getting electricity out there. Have to have a small aerator and a small pump to keep the water from stagnating and going foul. I have the pump, I have an extra bio-filter - I do not have an aerator but they only cost $10 for a small one so no big deal and they don't use much electricity.



Which leads me to the next "problem" I was facing in this array of ponds I am going to have out there - I need an electrical box mounted on a pole with at least 12 outlets to really do this right. Fortunately, there IS electricity out there - the line that feeds my AC unit could be tapped to provide the power.



But - funds are very tight right now. I have a big plus in my corner going: the elimination of all of those kids coming over had an instant effect on finances: a lot of food not being consumed. Chips, cookies drinks? Haven't bought any in over a week. My son doesn't want any of that stuff so I have no further reason to buy the junk. I don't eat it, either. But far beyond that is the huge amount of food I was buying to fill teenaged stomachs, which, if you've ever had teenagers, you know how much food they can eat.



I'll bet I dropped $300 per month - AT LEAST - in the departure of all of them. The only ones left are my son and J.D., the oldest black brother who comes over at night to get on the internet. No, they don't have internet at their house. He's been coming over to my house for.....years now. He does like the junk food but I am simply not going to be buying any more of it, or very little of it at this point.



I'm still in the deep woods- not out of the woods yet - in terms of finances and money spent on electricity and all the issues with tenants. One tenant will be getting a 5-day notice - she is paying me a portion of the rent with her unemployment but not all of it and now has entered a 3 week "behind" period that I will not let go any further, as I have no belief that she is going to find a job anytime soon.



The second tenant should have paid me the other half of the rent by now, she has not. That will be a "friendly notice" - please pay up. She does have a job and should have paid it by now.



So, do I get the turtles? A stop at Walmart today to find out how much that food costs will determine that. If it's as cheap as the Koi pellets and goldfish flakes, then I will have no problem with it.



Antonio - the 4 inch goldfish the family brought over yesteday - is doing quite well in his new environment. He's the smallest fish in the tank besides the mosquito eaters, but, apparenlty, goldfish don't really mess with each other that much, at least not from what I have observed.



The jury's still out on the 6 free fish I got yesterday and dumped into the other pond. They weren't doing well to begin with with the conditions they were subjected to at the previous owner's house, only time will tell if they are going to pull out of it.



Anyway, work day is almost here....



G'day.



ben

Sunday, August 22, 2010

Sunday

Pond next to the house was overflowing this morning.  Yes, it rained last night.  Free water to fill the pond (and water my plants)? Take that any day.  Anyway, I have a trip to make this morning to go get some more fish - free - another pond being shut down.  Got in on that one too late:  they were giving away Koi and goldfish.  Koi are gone, goldfish are left.  They claim they are 8 inches long and have 7 of them.    Well, for free, who cares what kind of fish they are, a big point of having ponds is to have fish in them.  These fish will go into the smaller pond as I believe I am maxed out on the number of fish the bigger pond should have in it.

Too many fish and the water will start to get full of toxins even if you are running a filtering system 24 hours a day.  After that, a family of however many is coming over to bring their beloved goldfish and want to see what kind of setup the fish is going to go into.  Okay.  Another free fish and I don't have to go anywhere to get it.  After that - well this may be pushing it timewise but I am hopeful to make it to church again.

2-1/2 hour break.  Got 6 fish from the shut-down pond and another goldfish arrived, family in tow, a few minutes ago.  These people wanted to shut down the aquarium but apparently wanted the kids to know that the fish was going to a good home.  So, they came into my back yard, mother had camera, papa had bucket, slowly dumped it into the pond, fish dumped out, kids started screaming with excitment - and they left.  That was it.  No elongated this that and the other thing, the got the fish in there and I guess that was their way of washing their hands of the fish and keeping it something in a good light for the kids.

The 6 fish are in the other pond.  They went to the bottom of it and sat there for a while.  They had been kept in a small tub with water so murky and dirty, you couldn't see those fish in there even though it was only maybe 14 inches deep.  The transport home probably didn't help them any, either.  Shock treatment should help them and so I dumped some of that in there.
Now that this is all over, I am attempting to decide whether to go to church or not.  I woke up too early this morning and now all this driving around and "excitement" has worn me out.  I'm ready to take a nap, not get dressed in Sunday Nines and go to church. 

Well, I have half an hour to decide.

Meanwhile, I'm still dieting.  My quit date for this diet?  When I lose the weight?  That probably won't work too well, now will it.  If you spend a year losing the weight and then just gain it all back again after you are "done", what possible good does that do?  I would think that would be depressing, to be honest.  I have no idea, honestly.  A life change in eating habits is what this is really all about.  I have kept a pretty strict approach about it - no cheating.  But, I have decided, I have been on this for quite a while now, the weight is ever-so-slowly dropping - but - I need to be able to cheat at least ONCE in a while.  Just one thing that I want, too: a German Chocolate Blizzard.  Pretty much guaranteed that before too many more days pass, I will have bought and consumed one and I won't feel bad about it one iota.

Now, if I go out and get ANOTHER one, then we have trouble. 

Well, I"m going to go check the fish and try taking a 20 minute nap.  Perhaps that will be enough to motivate me to go.

ben

Saturday, August 21, 2010

Saturday

So, I'm sitting here this morning attempting to play Cafe World - which was down - so I started reading other stuff.  Like the president and family on - another - vacation. I mean, these people take more vacations than most people's heart's beat in a single day.

Okay, a bit of an overstatement, still - they are so out-of-touch with the reality of the rest of us, it's just another slap in the face. 

Well, the ex-Marine comes out and asks for a favor - take him to wherever his truck got a flat tire last night.  Most certainly did not feel like doing that -it's hot and humid out, my car's AC isn't working, but - of course - I "sluggishly" agreed to help him out.  Got all the way over there - there just happens to be a tire shop across the street.  We go over there - his mother, who is lives and is IN Germany - was going to pay for the tire with a credit card over the phone.

Well, they put a good used tire on it and then find out his method of payment.  Their setup will not allow such to be input by hand, apparently it's card swipe only.  $25 for the tire and mounting it.  Yup, I paid for the tire - put it on my credit card so I wouldn't lose the cash that I have now, which isn't much.  His mother is sending him a check and he is going to start getting ample funds from the stipend the Marines are giving him for living expenses while going to school starting next month. 

Get back from that and Caleb needed a ride to work.  That is going to get very old, very quick.  He is getting his license in 2 or 3 weeks (provided he passes the driving test, of course) and he can take MY car to work when he is here as I don't care - I don't go out that often in this heat.  We are discussing fixing up my old Buick for him to drive.  It needs about 4 or 5 hundred dumped into it to make it a good, reliable vehicle. 

MUCH time has passed.  An offer to give a goldfish to me from an ad I placed almost a month ago on Craigslist came into my email.  Now?  They want to bring the whole family over to see where the fish is going to end up.  Young kids, I'm taking it they are not taking the departure of their beloved fish very well.  The fish has a name: Antonio.  Lol.  I had fish when I was a kid and I never named any of them. I just watched them with fascination. 

Don't know if they are going to come or not, waiting for a confirmation one way or the other.

John Wayne Saturdays on Direct TV.  I have watched 3 of them today.  Told ya I was unmotivated.  My favorite today - and probably most Wayne movies - is Chisum.  GREAT movie. Rio Bravo on tap right now. 

Diet - going well actually.  I have my temptations but I mostly ignore them. Those that raise their ugly heads I battle with one way or the other, but so far haven't given into.  Yesterday, I had a huge desire to go to Diary Queen and get a German Chocolate Blizzard.  It was literally HOURS before I could get that little compulsion to subside.  I have no such desires today, but I'm guessing I will eventually give into something and I won't feel bad about since - the rest of the time I am  following right along with keeping with it. 

Look, I saw a news story the other day that said that 25% of Arizonans are OBESE.  How many more are overweight?  How many of my friends from the past are grossly overweight, even morbidly obese?  Get old and fat?  And die young?  What possible allure does that have for me?  NONE,thank you, NONE.  Summertime is the worst time here - people don't WANT to go outside,they want to stay indoors and keep cool.  Great - if you can contain your desire to eat and eat.  Nightmare if you cannot.  I drink FAR more water than I drink anything else.  All day long, especially at work, I am drinking glass after glass after glass of water.  You now it's hot when you've drank almost a half gallon of water and the only thing coming out of you in elimination is sweat.

Lol.

Well, I am going outside for my daily, elongated visit to the pond with the fishies.  It's very therapeutic, even if it is 109 degrees out there right now. 

ben

Friday

Friday




Well looky here, it's Friday!! Facing another weekend and the potential of going to the same church twice, well, all I know is one thing: it's going to be HOT this weekend and I probably will feel like doing nothing again.



I am so ever-loving through with this summer and the heat you just don't know. I can't stand it. This summer has been worse than any in recent memory because of the high humidity factor. I don't remember the humidity levels being as high as the have been especially on days when the temps are getting up into the 110 arena.



The DC shipment just arrived. This guy shows up before we start - every Friday - and expects me to deal with it before I am signed in and before our store is opened. I always forget to lock the front door after I come in (therefore eliminating this man taking up my free time before work starts) - I did not forget today : )



If a CUSTOMER shows up early, then yes, I will deal with a customer, but this guy KNOWS our hours of operations yet feels no compulsion at all about coming in here and basically forcing my to deal with him. Just a bit irritating is how I will address it. Of course, I did remember to lock it once a long time ago - this guy had the gall to come to the window on the side of the building and try to get my attention. I completely ignored him.



Anyway, they FINALLY caught those fugitives - the guy that escaped from prison and then allegedly, with another escapee, killed an elderly couple in New Mexico. I have very foul feelings for people that do something as evil and selfish as an action such as that towards innocent human beings. Kudos to law enforcement for not giving up or even slowing down until they found those beasts. Why did this guy have to end those people's lives? I will never understand such actions because they are incomprehensible.



Meanwhile, a "giant oil plume" lurks underwater near the BP spill. The idea that this oil just "disappeared" - as some experts have stated - is ludicrous at best. WHERE did it "disappear" to? A spacecraft come down from the heavens, suck it all up and walaah, it's all gone?



Oh, and I think I'll not be eating any eggs anytime soon - not that I eat them that often anyways. Well, better yet, just make sure they're from a local source - we have plenty of them around here. I'm referring to the salmonella outbreak that is linked to tainted eggs and 1,300 cases so far being attributed to those eggs.



Well, the work day is here, the dude is outside, I have to get offa here, get signed in and get moving. Of course, that will only take a few minutes and unfortunately, there is NOTHING in our truck routing system to do today........



G'day.



ben

Thursday, August 19, 2010

3 days in a row now I have weighed in at 194 pounds.  I hit it 2 or 3 weeks ago and then went back up.  I had hoped I would have broken the 180 barrier by now - but - whatever.  I'm determined to get down there.  When the weather cools - will it ever - I will start walking and exercising again. 

Ballys is offering me a year membership at $99.  Yes, for the entire year.  I had a lifetime membership that only required a monthly service fee after the thing was paid off - that took a long time to do so.  I let the service fee go and lost it - a LONG time ago.  I could take an alternate way home from work that would not add any mileage and hit the gym - for what, $8 per month? and get some aerobics and free weights going.

I have absolutely no funds to do that right now, but they offer me this deal every month.  For years.  I paid the price, that's a fact - but another fact is that when I had that membership, I USED it to the nth degree.  I remember a big van had showed up out front of that place one day and were doing free body fat tests.  I measured - at that time - at 4.9% body fat.  I wasn't just skinny, I was lean - lots of muscle, toned, in good shape.  Not even near that now and neither would getting to that body fat proportions even be a goal.  I just want to get back into shape.  I am 2 pounds into the "ideal range"  - I have been out of that for quite a while now - maybe 2 years anyway. 

I'll tell you what got me cooking even more on this diet.  I read a local news story that fully 25% of Arizonans? Are OBESE.  That's unbelievable.  The story was obesity and didn't go into numbers of the adult population here that is overweight.  I had NO idea.  That is a staggering percentage of just the AZ population that is beyond overweight. 

If this nation is headed towards morbid obesity; obesity and overweight and the scientific facts that allegedly declare that that alone leads to more health problems - a lot more health problems and if it's true that it's of pandemic proportions, then perhaps there is merit to giving people that are in their normal/ideal weight range a huge discount, a rebate, whatever, for being in such condition. 

IF we are going to subsidize everything else - a thing that just frustrates me to no end, then perhaps we should do such in an arena where the desired benefit from doing such is a much healthier society? 

My Danes.  Doing well, of course. I always take care of my dogs as best as I can.  They sleep alot - it's a dog's life, yes?  However, they are not fat, obese, overweight - whatever.  I limit snacks.  They mostly only eat dog food.  I handed out an entire loaf of bread today split between  all of them - I am perfectly sure they could have eaten 4 loaves and would have wanted more.  They love walks - but I have refrained in this heat.  I take them 1/4 mile and they appear to be next-to-death with panting so heavy you'd think they had just been shot.


Waiting for cooler weather.  I will be much more active and if I can stay on this diet - I will lost much more weight.  Humidity and high temps are killers.  High temps - 110 today with 50% humidity this morning. 

Much more? Yes.  However, it's 8:30 pm and I think I am going to go to bed.

G'nite.

ben

Thursday

Thursday




Week dragging by as far as work is concerned because it has been very, very slow. So, to say it is "already" Thursday is better than nothing.



I am still putting in applications here and there for jobs that I am qualified for - ie: that I can show ample experience in doing. Just looking for part-time work to supplement my regular job's lack of hours. I have been looking for quite a long time and have only received one response, of which I replied back and never heard anything else again - probably because they were looking for full-time workers and I was and am seeking part-time.



Meanwhile, Obama is going to Ohio, apparently, to meet with some middle class family. The news put on a slew of people that live in the area that are unemployed, have been unemployed, have put a hundred/s of applications and received nothing in terms of any kind of prospect for employment.



Of interest was the lady that has 18 years of paralegal experience and can't find anything, anywhere. This is the field I was looking to go into some 5 or 6 years ago and opted against it because of the high cost of education to get any kind of degree AND the fact that lawyers were telling me that getting into the field is difficult unless you know someone.



Indeed. I can imagine being $45,000.00 in debt right now for student loans, having a degree in the field and have no job in that field and no prospects of finding one. That kind of thing is what leads people into depression, I do believe. Not financial depression, mental depression.



Anyway, yesterday I was scouring the web for more information about the CSA 2010 regulations that are - whenver it's going to happen - come into effect. Allegedly there is now a shortage of truckers.



??????.....and the numbers of truck drivers that will be needed by the end of next year? The figures range from 20,000 to 500,000. Reason? Drivers that are disqualified from the CDL pool because of the new regulations; baby boomers that are going to start retiring and truck drivers that were laid off during this recession and who these experts believe will NEVER come back.



It was interesting the many reports I found with drivers giving their testimonials of the crappy work that trucking is - referring to long haul/OTR. Never home, low pay, substandard living conditions, companies that don't care, not being paid for a lot of the work that is involved with the process of driving truck (such as loading and unloading, drivers simply aren't paid for waiting around a loading dock unless the company has some sort of fee they charge for making them wait over 2 hours).

August 19, 2010 6:00 AM

Anonymous said...

Yup, and the news isn't good for younger generation coming into the profession, either. The average yearly pay is $37,000.00. If I were starting out all over again, I would not want to get into a field where that kind of money is the only thing I was going to expect to get out of it. That used to be entry level pay, apparently that is way down as well.



It's interesting to read about the profession that I have been involved with starting in 1985 and remembering FAR better days in the trucking industry than they are now. Now, it is simply WAY over-regulated and WAY underpaid. The pay situation will iron itself out, at least to some degree, as the shortage of drivers will drive the pay scale up - drivers will become very selective about who they work for, especially veteran drivers, because they can. Perks, please and money while you're at it.



I have no such problems. I am paid for everything I do. Fueling the truck, loading the truck, driving the truck, unloading the truck, whatever it is, I am paid by the hour. Trucking industry balks at the idea of paying ALL drivers that way - of course, it would cost them a lot more money. Drivers would actually get paid for what they are doing.



How about a combination of miles driven and hours worked, then? Nope, they don't want anything to do with it. Okay, how about miles driven and a bonus for each load delivered? SOME do that to a limited degree, most won't. Doesn't matter, they simply don't want to pay enough to lure people into the profession.



Good luck with that. Eventually the hand will be forced. No drivers equals no products on the shelves and as I relentlessly point out, rail cannot handle all of the volume that is transported (trucks deliver 70%) and even if it could, trucks would still have to take most of it from a railyard to the stores.



It may be years before any real changes occur, dunno, but I guarantee that it will change eventually, it will HAVE to. Let the cost of paying drivers be passed onto the consumers, truck drivers sacrifice thier lives on the road and that's a fact. If the pay were MUCH better even I would consider going back OTR or regional. Lol, but I wouldn't consider it very long, I want nothing to do with OTR anymore.



Well, I'm still getting adjusted to the "new life" of not having any kids around. Amazingly peaceful and I don't miss the constant in and out all the time - at all. My son still coming 3-1/2 days per week, but his schedule is so busy now with school and work I hardly see him.



Anyway, work day approaches and at least there is SOMETHING to do in the truck routing system. Thank GOD Almighty!



G'day.



ben

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Wednesday

Wednesday




“59% of all voters now favor repeal of the health care bill.” I was just reading a news story about Obama's ship - it's sinking and FAST. All kinds of polls covering the gamut showing him the loser in every one of them. And why not? He was supposed to "fix" the job situation, at least that was one of his big profiles when he was out there lying to everyone to get himself elected.



Do I hear someone blaming Bush again? GET OVER IT. Whatever Bush did or didn't do, Obama has had AMPLE time to get the economy rolling and has spent near TRILLIONS of dollars to try and do it.



Yet, foreclosures are still on the uptick, millions upon millions of people are out of work and the fear of a double-dip recession are still plaguing the overall economic atmosphere.



"Even in a poll by Democracy Corps—the firm run by Democratic strategists James Carville and Stan Greenberg—56% of likely voters said that “liberal” describes Barack Obama “very well or well” and 55% said the same about labeling Obama a “socialist.”"



Ahhh, finally, an actual POLL that agrees with me and my take that this man is AT BEST a socialist and is hell bent on running every aspect of our lives. November is getting here, folks, it will be here soon enough. Independents aren't liking the democrat's version of things - not that they like the GOP's either - but - the control of the senate must be given back to the GOP to end this wild spending spree.



The listing of polls, the different firms that are taking the polls and the fact that they are all coming out with basically the same numbers is astounding. Yet, Obama goes around acting like nothing's going on, a man that is grossly and totally out of touch with America, it's pulse and the (bad) direction that we are now headed - or more like - spiralling in.



Okay, I'm getting off that subject. I just started reading this news story with all these different polls - however - it was an opinion piece. Still, the polls were what I was interested in, not the man's opinion. I don't CARE about any news organization's opinion, it is all skewed. Whatever side the writer is on, that's the bent it is skewed for. I am ALL for just plain ole' reporting, put forth the FACTS and leave US to form our OWN opinions (you know, like it used to be in the "good ole' days"?).



WHERE do you find THAT kind of reporting anymore? Does ANY news reporting agency in America have that? I have heard that some organizations that are foreign-based have much better reporting, I wouldn't know.

August 18, 2010 5:59 AM

Anonymous said...

Onto other things. It literally poured rain yesterday evening going on into the night. RIGHT after I got through watering my plants - I had let it go for 2-1/2 days to see if it was going to rain, I couldn't let it go anymore - it started pouring. It's okay, it was a short, light watering so no huge waste there.



I can let watering go another 3 days now, even if it gets really hot again (which I'm sure it will).



Coming home daily now to no kids in the house has been a pleasant and surreal situation. I'm not going to say that I am missing all of the commotion going on all around me. No, the serenity and peace has been amazingly helpful to my sanity levels and just plain old cleanliness levels in the house. One tenant even went to work on the living room seeing the kids were gone and spruced it up very nicely.



I'm not sure that I will let them back in if the request is made, I am liking this "new" situation too much. The grass is greener on the other side of the fence - is it really? Go out there and get over there, there is no grass, it died a long time ago and there is nothing but bare earth. This in regards to Michael's family and the way those people live - which is currently in a hotel room somewhere.



I remind myself of those people and their living situation whenever I start to get ancy about having tenants in the house. But, I am coming to realize, the real anciness wasn't necessarily tenants as much as kids. Tenants can be good or bad, sometimes you can get them to change their ways (cleanliness) - you can always get rid of them if they refuse. Kids - especially teenagers - much different story. As I said in another post, we had gotten into it quite heavily last week when I came home and got mad that the house was dirty and I was having to clean up after them.



Whatever the case, the work day approaches and for the 3rd day in a row, there is nothing to do. Well, okay, Monday and Tuesday there was one small delivery in the morning and then that was it. Sales forecasts for this month were pretty dismal company wide in our Arizona region. I didn't think it would get THIS bad. I haven't fired up the semi since Friday to give an idea of it. Any deliveries and pickups have been made in the company pickup.



Beautiful weather this morning. Everything is wet and it's cool outside. COOL, yes you read that right. It won't stay that way, of course, but it is nice while it lasts. It's 80 degrees right now at 79% humidity. Okay, maybe that isn't cool, I don't know, it felt cool to me - in comparison to the 115 degree days we've had,I'll take that any day as long as the sun is being blocked by cloud cover.



The notion that we have a dry heat is really going out the window this summer. There have been far more days of high enough humidity coupled with high temperatures that really, that label to us is disappearing. When it's 107 degrees and it's 50% humidity out, that's pretty warm, folks.



Whatever the case, I must be outta here.



G'day.



ben

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Tuesday

Tuesday




Will be here (at work) late today as I was asked to close the store. Manager is going to yet another "function" of the divorce proceedings.



So, senator Gaffe Reid finally takes a stance other than lip service to the democratic party. I'm amazed. I wouldn't vote for that guy if you paid me good money to, but still - he is against having that mosque built on ground zero. I am also against that mosque being built there, I consider it a slap in the face of the firefighters, police officers and everyone else that died at that site on 9/11. No, I have no qualms going into some political fields on my blog........



Umm, well whatever. I have been sitting here reading news blip after news blip, all KINDS of stuff in there today. The child sex sting was a bit horrific to say the least - - old guys wanting to have sex with young (and I mean YOUNG) girls.



Another incredulous story is this deal about the Pentagon wanting to buy Russian made helicopters for use in Afghanistan and not even letting American companies bid on the deal? That is completely and totally outrageous. Right, Obama, you want to put America back to work, or was that Russians? How many potential jobs lost to a contract that might go overseas for a product that can and is being built in our own back yard?



Unbelievable. Well, I just got started with the gears cranking and here it is, time to get to work. Well, work takes precedence.



G'day.



ben

Monday, August 16, 2010

Monday

Monday




I didn't sleep NEAR as well last night as I did the night before. I had an upset stomach/acid indigestion/whatever going on down there and it kept me awake for hours. Nice to finally fall asleep and then have that alarm clock banging in your ears shortly thereafter......



They were predicting in the 111's high for today, now it has gone done to a 104 high. Forecasters have never been able to successfully figure out the weather during the monsoon season because storms start up in the mountains with moist air being drawn upward, accumulating and coming down "here" and dumping it's stuff on us overnight. They just never have quite gotten it.

Which is okay by me, it can get as cool as it wants to. The rest of the week looks pathetic in terms of temps until Sunday where they're showing a high of 99 degrees.



That's also getting close to the end of August and I expect that sooner or later, it will start cooling down and the highs won't be so dreadful.



I'm following the feds with interest. One dissenter on the board is saying that it's a risky gamble to leave the rates at almost nothing. I do wonder what Greenspan has to say about all of this, regardless if he doesn't hold the position anymore.



As for today, one small delivery and that is all that's in the delivery system. Well, if nothing else comes up I am going to ask to leave early, that upset stomach kept me awake most of the night and I am totally out of it.



ben

Sunday, August 15, 2010

Church

There are 3 churches on the same side of the street.  The first one I didn't even see until after I was driving home from church, the second one was full of people and the 3rd - well there were maybe 5 cars in the parking lot.  I was 15 minutes early, I figured to drive around the block.  I know, scaredy cat, but really, what is the deal with a church that no-one is going to?

Well, when it comes to the things of the Lord, the human mind can be at direct conflict with what He wants you to do, regardless of what anything may appear to be.  Tempted to pull into the parking lot of the big church with at least hundreds of people's worth (and therefore, be able to disappear in a sea of people), I decided that I had come to visit the other church and I was going to go regardless of what my mind was telling me. 

In walking through the door, a lady with a big smile handed me a pamphlet, asked me if I had been to the church before.  I thought she probably knows full well I haven't been there before if this place has as few people as it appears, but I politely responded no, I am a newcomer.  Asks me to fill out a card - they all, always ask you to do that.  After that, the pastor walks up.  Man in his 70's.  Apparently decides that I am to become a crusade of his to win over, I guess.  He starts talking, we start talking back and forth.  We go into the "room", I sit down and he sits down next to me.  The man is an intellectual, bright, intelligent, up-to-date on current world affairs.  But, he is a spiritual intellectual.  The conversation ends, the service starts. 

Good worship music.  Offering - yes I gave even though I really can't afford it.  Then the sermon.  I have heard some pastors going into politics vaguely, I have never heard a pastor going into the depth of politics as it relates to Christianity and the Bible as I heard this man.  It was NOT a boring "sermon", I was listening intently, to be honest.  The man pays close attention to what the politicians say - and then goes back and finds many instances where they contradict themselves.  Completely contradict themselves.  One of the most astonishing things he came out with - that I haven't heard before and will have to check to verify - is a statment made by Obama.  He stated that Obama, when speaking about his views on abortion, had stated that a woman should have the right to have an abortion even up and into the third trimester.  Allegedly, Obama stated something like: I say we should just let them have the baby on the table and then throw the baby away and let it die.

Something to that effect.  I don't just tend to take people's statements at blind faith and not verify them.  I should have taken notes but I didn't expect the depth of the discussion that was given. 

Oh, I forgot about the part where 3 ladies came in and sat down right next to me - very friendly.  Apparently not having a ringer on the 4th finger identifies you  as potential mating substance? I don't really know, but one of them was very good looking, I'll say that much. 

I left thinking that that was time well spent.  Decided to treat myself with an avocado chicken salad from a local eatery on the way home.  Now? Trying to recapture the momentum I had all this morning in getting all kinds of cleaning projects done around here.  I think it will resurface as soon as my food settles a bit : )

ben

Sunday

Woke up at 4:10 am - this morning of course.  May sound extremely early and I suppose it is, but......I went to bed at 8:30pm.  The significant factor here is that I slept through the night without waking up a single time.  That, for me, is exceptional.  Me getting almost 8 hours of sleep is unheard of in any recent times - going back at least 5 years. 
Cleaning frenzy.  I started cleaning - and cleaning - and cleaning.  Going through cupboards, clothing, cleaning bathroom, kitchen, laundry this that and the other thing.  3 solid hours of it so far.  I am 75% self-persuaded to go to church today.  I haven't fully "arrived" at that decision, but I think I am actually going to find muster to get over there and see if it's something I can get back into.  Service starts in 1 hour and 20 minutes. 

So that's it.  If I get to church, when I come home it will be more cleaning.  I have several things I want to get done in this house today now that most of the kids are gone and presumably will be gone indefinitely/permanently/who knows. 

I read the news this morning, nothing of great inerest.  As usual, Obama this and Obama that.  This time they show a pic of him swimming somewhere in the Gulf.  I wouldn't go swimming in there if you paid me.  I thought California beaches were dirty.  Michelle apparently is getting flak for her lavish vacations and pricey outings.  Yes, I know they are reporting that the Obama's paid for it with their own money.  The point is the same point I have been making for some time now: rich people in positions of political power having no clue what it is like to live like much of the rest of us and don't WANT to know.  I can't just hop in a plane whenever I want and jet around the world, buying the fanciest clothing and eating at the finest restaurants while staying at lavish hotels spending thousands of dollars per night doing such. 

But really, it's like thumbing your nose at the population you are allegedly representing.  Talk of double-dip recessiong, unemployment at such high levels people are giving up hope of finding a job, foreclosures, on and on and on.  Meanwhile, the president and his wife and family are having the time of their lives, while telling us to pinch pennies and tighten the belt.  Is there some kind of obvious disparity here?  There is no empathy for the rest of us that are worse-than-struggling, they can't have empathy because they aren't poor, broke, homeless or unemployed.  Certainly the Obama's aren't the only family in political power that are living the high life and doing the same, but the president is going to get more flak, obviously, since it's his policies that were supposedly going to make the economy rebound.

Instead, they continue to blame Bush.  If, after 4 years of office and this thing is still not turned around, will they still blame Bush?  I blame the whole lot of them for spending taxpayer money like there is no end to the amount that can be tapped, when in reality we are operating in the highest deficit in history.  These people have no grip on reality.  They don't CARE, that's the point.  You want me to like the house, senate and presidency, then get people in there that are totally opposite of what's in there now.  Pay down the debt.  Get rid of government health insurance (it WILL turn into an endless money pit).  Earmarks and pork barrel spending and all the rest of this money pit. 

No sense in getting worked up over all of that, I will be at the polls in November and my small voice will be heard on a ballot.  1 hour left before church starts.  I'm going, I think.  I know, it's ridiculous that I have such an internal war going on whether I am going to go to church for a couple of hours or not, but it's there none-the-less.  I will sit in the back of the place and observe.  Not judge, just observe.  What's this church like.  How do the people treat each other?  Of course, it is easy to put on a smiley face for church on Sunday, is the walk there the rest of the week?  No way to determine that.  How do they greet newcomers?  Actually, I"m more concerned about whether there is a great deal of gossip and backstabbing.  Little cliques of people that stand around in groups and "chit-chat" about so and so.  I've been there and done that, I'm not interested in hearing any of that junk.

But, I will go with an open mind and positive - and hope to walk out of there that way.

G'day.

ben

Saturday, August 14, 2010

Reflection

It was time to get out of the house.  Put on the straw hat, go to the pond area and sit down. 

Shortly after I got out there, a hummingbird caught my attention.  About 9 feet off the ground, it was zinging back and forth attempting to catch a small fly.  It did, eventually, catch it.  It came back - another fly, more dinner. I have not seen that before.  I have only seen them feeding at the feeder which I have not been filling because it is in the direct sunlight and the liquid goes bad quickly.  Cooler temps and I will start filling it up again.

Dogs in tow, the fish were hungry.  Very small black ants had found their way into the goldfish flakes container that was closed.  No matter, they aren't going to stick around on that food in the water, if they do, I doubt the fish are going to care that they swallowed an ant. 

I believe the direction of life should be controlled by the Lord.  I also know that for several years now, I have been floating aimlessly.  I feed the hungry, yes, but as far as fulfilling the call of the Lord on my life - it hasn't really been going in any concrete direction. 

Is it time, I had to ask myself, to do something about this?  Have I had enough of the post-divorce trauma that I have let debilitate me for over 5 years now?  Shall I finally find a way to get into something with a group of people that believe the same and start living life again?

I wondered, also,about why I had bought such a large house.  4 bedrooms turned into 5 with 2 bathrooms, 2,000 square feet.  Why does a single guy need a house that large?  What do I need with a place this large?  Couldn't I have bought a smaller one and not had to have tenants?  Not sure about that one, the upgrade in size was only $10,000 more, relatively small amount for a house and adding substantial square footage.  I never thought, though, that cooling this place would cost so much in the summer.  Well, we're already halfway through August - temps will start going down next month (hopefully) and so will my cooling bill.

Perhaps I had thoughts of having another family.  I dunno.  I don't really regret it, yet, I wonder if I wouldn't have been just as happy with a smaller house and a bit smaller payment. 

I can only say that tomorrow morning, around 10:00 am, I am going to try and force myself out to that car and get over to that church.  I think/believe it's the one.  I haven't ever been there, I just feel it. 
The last 3 I didn't have that feeling.

I"m not going in any particular direction with this, just expressing innermost thoughts.  Not all of them, but sufficient.  There are things that go on in my life that I don't write out on an internet forum.  Some things should be kept personal.  Some things it just isn't wise to speak about to everyone on the block.  It's been an interesting 24 hours is all I can say. 

I'm going to bed early.

ben

Saturday

Michael - is gone. As is the way with him and his family, things can change abruptly without any forewarning. 
He got his stuff and left.  That's it.
I have no qualms with it, either.  One less mouth to feed, TV's that won't be on endlessly.  The black kids won't come over because he isn't here and that will mean even more money saved.  Life isn't all about saving money, but this was his decision. 

Caleb - is gone a lot now.  Work keeps him very busy along with school now.  Some girl at work  - his age - apparently thought it would be cute to start rumors that he is a slacker and told him that he was going to get fired.

Instead, it turns out, this girl is going into rehab.  At the ripe old age of 17, she is an alcoholic and they are going to try and bring her out of it.  What, however, is it that goes through the mind to start an ugly rumor like that?  Caleb's manager called him to him earlier this week - Caleb thought it was all over.  He was going to be fired.  Instead, the manger asked him if he could take some of the girl that is going into rehab's shifts?  Caleb told him he thought he was going to be fired and answered the question after being asked why he thought that, the manager simply replied that you don't listen to them, I am your manager, not them.

He's growing up and learning.  Dealing with workplace crap can sometimes be very traumatic.  It can certainly be a big test.  It will definitely force him to learn how to deal in inter-personal issues not only in the workplace, but in all of life.

Meanwhile, I am sitting here in a completely empty house.  No kids, no tenants.  Not that the tenants are gone permanently - they are out doing whatever they are doing.  I have not experienced this kind of tranquility and peace for a long time in this house.  No pity party desired, I am all over this.  Okay, there are 4 dogs here, but besides that....oops, forgot the trailer tenants.  They are almost always here.  He just paid me up a whole month's rent and is hoping to get a place in Mesa next month. 

My thoughts have wandered towards attempting to force myself to go to church tomorrow.  I have the church picked out - it's in Chandler.  I pass by it every day going to work.  It has drawn me.  I want to go - and yet - the old issues always come to mind.  10:30 am.   No, not committing to go, just trying to get my mind into the place where I can walk through the doors, put on a smile, find a seat, sit down and absorb whatever there is to absorb from the place.  I have some trepidation - it is a prophetic church.  I have been called out in prophetic churches before - not a bad thing I guess but still. 

I feel a great need to get back into the fellowship of other believers and start making some new friends again. I feel I am at the verge of it. 

Besides taking Caleb to work earlier, I have spent the entire day indoors.  It is very hot outside and I have simply not had the gumption to do anything but watch movies.  In fact, I have done nothing at all, not even cleaning.  The house, however, is in pretty good shape right now so no big deal.  The heat advisories (yes, there is more than one for the area I am living in) are in effect until Monday evening.  The second hottest summer on the records since they started keeping records.  My electric use is off the wall, but, I am keeping it at around 82 in here during the day if no tenants are here. 

So that's it.  I am not going into news stuff now cause' I don't much feel like it.  Obama this, Obama that.  It's amazing how much that man really WANTS the press to cover him.  Self-aborbed?  Certainly in love with the sound of his own voice. No, I'm not a fan and never will be.  At least the outcry for him to stop blaming Bush is getting louder.  More people are saying - gee, Mr. President, you have had a year and a half to deal with this and now we are looking at a potential double-dip recession. I really don't think he cares.  In fact, I don't think any of them care one way or the other.  Get their agenda through, come what may, consequences be damned.

I'm watching some freaky movie called "The Eye" on Lifetime Movie Network.  Weird stuff there.  I saw the movie once but it was late when I watched it - quite a while back - and fell asleep so I really don't even know the ending of it.

Well, that's my update.

ben

Friday, August 13, 2010

Friday/Judgement?


You know, I believe in God. I believe in the atoning blood sacrifice that Jesus Christ made at the Cross of Calvary. I believe in the in-dwelling of the Holy Spirit. I also happen to believe that the prophetic - such as was in Old Testament times - is still alive and kicking and being brought forth, yes, today.

I believe that because I operated to some small extent in the spirit of prophecy for some time before I got divorced. I"m not saying I'm anyone grand or special, just saying what I believe.

So, when I start getting these feelings, inner speakings, whatever you want to call it, about something coming down the pike, I tend to pay attention to such things. I'm not even currently going to church - not involved in fellowship with other believers (my bad, long story, not going into that here, still trying to force myself to get into a church and soon) - and I am having these thoughts and things coming before me.

I heard some stuff on the radio yesterday that totally confirmed what I have been thinking and I wasn't listening to a Christian radio station. My ex-wife then sends me all kinds of stuff about terrorist cells being all around us. You see in the news about terrorists being "home grown" - right here in the good ole' U.S.

I do believe there is a lot more to this than the government is telling us. I rather believe, also, that they know full well what is going. I'm not saying the government is involved in any of this, to the contrary. When terrorist cells want to stay invisible, they know how to do it.

And if they decide to do something, how are they going to be stopped? There were also recent reports of Hezbollah coming through or stationed near the Mexico/New Mexico or Texas border. Other reports that terrorists are coming through the basically open border that it is down south (of me, anyway).

The picture starts to come together of why I am feeling what I am feeling. I'm less than 200 miles from the Nogales border entry.

If these cells exist, what are they planning on doing? Usually, modus operandi dictates destruction on mass level versus "just" killing af few people on the streets or something. Such as a giant stadium, or a large event where mass amounts of people are gathered together.

My senses are not failing me. It is a strange thing to suddenly come to all of these conclusions, but the pieces have been coming together for some time now in my mind, I just didn't recognize it.

 Fear? The only fear I can have is of God Himself. HE is the one to fear, not man. If I am not ready to go to Him, that is fearful. I cannot stop man, mankind and it's inherent nature to destroy itself by destroying it's own kind. Wars have gone on from the beginning of time. Mankind is, generally, self-destructive.

No, the only preparation I can do is to make sure my heart is right - and I do believe there are areas lacking right now - that terrifies me more than any threat of death at the hands of other men through bombs or shootings or whatever. We are all going to go out of this world one way or the other. Where we end up is of eternal, utmost, grave concern.

Now, I do firmly believe in the right to bear arms and the right to defend your home. This goes without saying. But - against a group of men that are trained in tactical maneuvers and the workings of war? I would be mowed down in a minute. My head would be blown clean off and that would be the end of that. Oh, I might get one of them with a lucky shot, who knows - but reality is I am nothing compared to someone with military training and I am not about to go out somewhere and start learning. I don't really care that much. I believe my life is in God's hands and however I go out of this world, it won't be because some man decided to shoot me, rather, that the Lord allowed such to happen - or didn't. I can tell you (true) stories of when I was on the mission field and the Lord protected me from imminent hard. I could, but won't - not now anyway. First, you would have to believe that God WILL actually intervene in a situation if He does, indeed, choose to do so. Second, you would have to take my word for it. Third - work day approaches and I don't have time to write all of that out.

WHY men/mankind is so hell bent to destroy each other? Not a clue. I mean, I have a clue, it just doesn't make any sense, at all. These people would go out of their way to come into our society, set up camp and devise ways to kill the masses? It's just senseless.

I know, strange way to start a Friday morning entry, but that's what hit me this morning as I started thinking about all of this. No, I am not trying to instill fear into anyone, really, I am speaking to myself. This IS, after all, my internet diary.

Anyway, Sunday morning will come and I will face the same thing I face every Sunday morning: can I force myself to get into church? What will happen if I go? I do know WHY I have such a problem, I have written about it in my blogs for a long time now, it's nothing new or hidden. I feel the need to get back into fellowship, yet I have this inner wall blocking me.

Anyway, very little to do here, at work, today. So far, anyway, that can always change of course. I do believe I am going to seriously start picking back up on my food storage, I stop and start and stop - well, I think it's time to do some other things beyond what I have been doing.

This weekend? No idea. Work on the pond. Whatever is coming down the pike - if indeed anything really is - I am still going to have my little place of solace for however long it lasts. When it's gone, it's gone. All things in this world are temporal anyway.

With that I bid you a great day : )

ben

Thursday, August 12, 2010

The Mine

This mine I went into today is up in the mountains.  Well, I think they all are.  My trip led me through a small town that I have been through many times before - but only on the main street.  This time, I was driving on a narrow street lined with small and very old homes.  The end of the street was the beginning of the mine.

Guardshack greeted me. I went in.  There was a picture of a pickup truck and a notice about safety.  Okay, it didn't look anything like a pickup truck, I just read the notice and found out through that that this was once, at one time, a pickup truck.  A TV also on a stand.  I dreaded having to watch a safety video - I have watched hundreds of them in my trucking career, I am a very safe driver and I don't take unecessary, dangerous actions in a semi-truck.  I understand that a dump truck with a bed big enough to hold 20 cars can run me clean over and not even phase the thing.

Don't get in their way.  Doing so will have worse consequences than getting hit by a train. Trains run into you and tear vehicles apart, these dump trucks will just drive clean OVER you and the vehicle you are driving in and you will be - stone dead.  

I didn't have to watch the video. In fact, I didn't have to sign a bunch of waivers, either.  I just had to sign a registration card that is good for a year, just like the other mine I was in not long ago. 

Wait in the truck - 40 minutes until the man showed up to escort me in.  I hadn't seen this foreman for a long time.  I followed him and we immediately proceeded upon what I am estimating to be at least a 9% grade.   Up and up.  And up.  Get to a cross "road" - all roads in the mine are basically dirt roads.  Another cross road and then, a cross road with huge dump trucks rolling back and forth.  We wait - they have the right of way and rightfully slow.  Nobody in their right mind is going to try and beat one of those thing, to do so - well, if you lose the race?  Good luck with that.

On and on - up and up.  We get to the top.  It's the top of a mountain that has been levelled.   That's what it was.  I had wondered if this mine was also building a lake and yes, I asked.  One employee was all too eager to answer all of my questions.

Yes, they are building a lake - another lake to be filled with sulphuric acid.  Yes, SULPHRURIC ACID - an entire LAKE'S worth.  That is must mind blowing to me. 

Then comes the real story of the completely flattened pickup truck.  It seems that - only 2 months ago this occured - one of those huge dump trucks had stalled and wouldn't start.  The operator of the truck called in mechanics.  2 mechanics showed up in a pickup truck, parking in front of the tires.  Yes, I said in front of the tires, the tires on those things are at least 8 feet tall, much taller than any pickup truck.  WHY you would park in front of such - no clue.  I would never in a lifetime of lifetimes do any such thing, I would fear the thing rolling and crushing me. 

Well, unfortunately for the mechanics, the operator of the dump got the thing fired up and started rolling, he had no idea those fellows were under there.  The mechanics had violated a safety protocol that was designed for just that purpose: to keep them out of harm's way.  They were supposed to announce on their radio to that operator that they were there, under the truck and please don't crush us.   The operator, undoubtedly believing that extreme safety measures were being followed as these mines dictate that they are to be followed (infractions are followed up with people getting fired) just drove off. 

One of the mechanics was flattened with the truck.  The pickup?  To see the picture, you have no idea that that used to be a pickup truck.  None.  It's just a flat piece of metal laying on the ground.  The other mechanic apparently tried getting out - he was seriously injured - but he survived.  The truck operator? No idea, but I can only guess the torment that must go through a mind and heart when thinking that you killed someone, even if no fault of your own. 

The trip into the mine wasn't bad because of that, but it certainly has a sombering effect. 

The giant, stainless-steel fittings that I took in there were to be used for piping that is going to be used to move the sulphuric acid.  I didn't know stainless steel could withstand the acidic effects of sulphuric acid.  I did know that stainless steel can withstand the attempted effect of many other substances - but not this stuff. 

It was a great drive - until I started back to town.  I caught up with a mobile home being transported down the 2-lane highway - meaning stuck behind this thing as well as a bunch of other vehicles for an entire 7% grade's worth down a mountain pass and many miles beyond that.  DPS was escorting the thing because of the fact that it was imposing on oncoming lanes and oncoming traffic had to be stopped and stand off to the side of the road.

After miles and miles of this, we finally came to a 4 lane portion of the highway and I got into the fast lane as everyone else apparently thought that we should just follow behind the thing because Highway Patrol was escorting them.  Bunk.  Not disrespecting Highway Patrol, but I have passed that kind of stuff forever.  I figured to pull up on the Highway Patrol SUV that was in the back and see if he waves me on - which he did - he stuck his hand out the window and started waving traffic to move along, please.  I had no qualms with that, as we were going 15 mph below the speed limit.  Passed them and left traffic behind. 

That was my trip.  I wish I could have more like it, but, they come along only once in a while.  I was going to take my break time and get some rocks, but, I didn't want to potentially have a conflict with Highway Patrol and the U.S. Forest Service, I figure to call DPS (Highway Patrol) and find out what they say about a person stopping at designated stop points and taking rocks.  Not off the side of the road, but well away from the road.  The Federal Government is ownership of the Forest Service (who says it's okay), the State of Arizona is ownership of state DPS (of whom I haven't asked yet).  Just look at Arizona's SB1070 to try and figure whether there are conflicts between the state and the feds.

Sure, I could win a court case - feds always supersede state, or so they say - but why bother?  Just get a stance from them and be done with it.  If it's a no, I'll find rocks somewhere else, already have that in mind. 

Other stuff?  Just a glimpse.  Friday lands tomorrow.  Kewl. However, tomorrow is Friday the 13th (in case you are superstitious).  I fixed the manifold for my dripless system today.  I had no choice, certain plants start to whither as they decide they don't have enough water.  It was easy and only took a minute.  I am going to try and get the hole finished for the pond this weekend - which does not mean the pond will be placed in the ground, I also have to lug home hundreds of pounds of sand to rest the pond bottom on and that may or may not get done.  Probably not.

Fish are in good health, dogs are content, kids are kids and I am me.


G'day.

ben

 Thursday - mid afternoon Yup, I haven't posted in several days. I've actually written some but I never posted the stuff.  Just neve...