Starting to feel sick. Hit me after the prayer meeting was over tonight.  Chest congestion and head aching.  Feeling like s*** basically.  So, taking B and C vitamins - lots of C - and Mucinex to try and head this off at the pass.

The never-ending story with my lady, her ex and the boys.  Really, this goes on on a daily basis.  The ex sends her a text message telling her how happy he is that she is now engaged to "Ben" and wishes us a good life together????  Just as I recognize when my ex is saying something that is loaded with -whatever it is loaded with even though others don't see anything at all bad about something, so does my lady with this kin of message from ex.

She shows me the text and asks me what I think about it?  I think I would like to have a conversation with that man, that's what I mean. No, not violence or raised voices, just a man-to-man talk. If that is even possible with this dude.  I will say one thing: his days of saying all kinds of BS to her on the phone or in text messages are numbered.  I won't tolerate it.  She can hand the phone to me and I will reply to this dude.

Regardless and onto the now 16-year old - he turned 16 on the 4th.  He was completely and totally depressed tonight.  I contacted him and he's getting cranky about why I didn't tell him that I had proposed to his mom?  Uhh, dude, it was at 11 o'clock last night.  You were in bed, sleeping because you have to get up for school.  I woke up late this morning, you were already in school before I could send you a message.  Well, mom could have told me last night!  Dude! You KNEW I was going to propose to her!  I'm sorry!

It's cool was his reply but the real thing that was bugging him came out after that.  His girlfriend.  She couldn't see him for his birthday - on the 4th and he couldn't see her for her birthday which is today, the 6th.  But he knew he wouldn't be able to and was okay with seeing her on Valentine's day.  This is one of his statements: "Shit gonna hit the fan is what I'm telling you. Its gonna get messy" He's telling me his dad is hiring a lawyer and that he has talked to a "lot" of government "people" that are telling him he can get out of his mom's house and into dad's house.  There is ONLY one reason he wants to do this: so he can have unlimited access to this girl that is 14 years old, he is 16.  This is all about pure lust and there is ONLY the element of trouble that can be attached to this situation.

Does someone want to weigh in on the idea of a 30 something year old woman telling this 16 year old boy that his mom's problem is that she needs to get laid?  This is the kind of s*** that both the ex and that girl's parents are filling this boy's head with.  I had this kid all good with the current situation and that if he's good, by Valentine's day, he can visit with her.  But 10 seconds with that ex and the next thing you know, he is all depressed, thinking about cutting himself again and listening to this "father" - term used very loosely in this man's case - filling this boy's head with shit.  Dad qualifies for an 80k loan - please tell me what kind of neighborhood you are going to be living in that has 80k housing.

I couldn't talk to the boy, he wasn't going to listen so I just let it go for the time being.  This situation with this boy needs to come to a conclusion and apparently the only way that is going to happen is through the courts. But really, this will only deal with the legal aspects and apparently the ex has no clue, there is much damning evidence against him, including vulgar text messages sent to m'lady about one of the kids and other explicit, reprehensible texts that she has saved

I will not be able to bite my tongue forever with this man.  Some of the things he says to her?  Totally pisses me off.   Treats that lady like a pile of dogshit.  I am soooo sick of his bs.  She is becoming less opposed to the idea of my talking with him, especially now that we are engaged to be married.

I will have my hands full.  If the 16 year old is even still living there when I get there - who knows how that is going to turn out though I doubt the courts are going to change the current status with his living situation - he will be a lot to deal with all by himself. But the 14 year old? Equally as difficult but with different issues.

Whatever the case, I am exhausted and I need to get to bed.

ben