It's very cold here. It may not be 56 below zero with windchill like in Michigan, but it's 15 below with windchill here, right now, and I'm not a fan. In fact, my few minutes out doors on 3 occasions here?  My face started burning. I have no ski mask for the morning and that is concerning. I'm going to have to take a shirt or a sweatshirt or something and wrap it around my face, I'm not standing out there 2 hours and just take it. 

It was quite the trip up here. Not for me, but for at least 100 trucks I saw stranded on the side of the road. That isn't any exaggeration.  Truck after truck after truck.  Several places where there were 6, 7 and more trucks broke down on the side of the highway in less than a mile.  Why?  I can only surmise, but I'l take an educated guess that their fuel is gelling.  Diesel fuel can gel in extreme temps, you have to put additive in the fuel - tho in the cold states they usually add it to it at the truck stops so you don't have to. 

But it's the only reason I can think of all those trucks broken down like that. 

I fought internally coming up here whether to get a hotel or not.  I was looking and could find nothing "cheap".  $100, $140, $80 - nothing I want to spend just for a night to get out of that truck and into a warm, cozy room with a comfortable bed.  After an hour of searching I gave up and drove on.  Only to get irritated, why can't I find anything? So I did a broad generic search for the region near the plant.  2 hotels that had no truck parking and - no thanks anyway.  More searching and finally found this place in Wauseon.  I'm in Ohio, btw.  Using some of my Expedia points, I got a room at the Rodeway Inn for $45.  That's cheap enough.  The room was  a pleasant surprise.  A bit of wear on a few things but the carpet is not smelly or sticky and the bed are comfortable.  The bathroom is decent and it has a refrigeror and a microwave in it.

That's a good thing, because the diner I was going to eat at? They shut down due to the cold.  So the truck stop owner next door says.  They were in there, tho, the restaurant that is.  I called over there with no answer.  I later was looking out the back window of my room which has a view of their back entryway and saw 6 of them coming out of there.  They all left except for one person who went back in. The place is shuttered and the lights aren't on, they aren't cooking today.  Besides nasty truck stop food, it's the only thing near here. If there's something further down the road? I don't know and I don't care.  It's too cold to be walking any great distances and I don't want to drive that big truck to try and find a place to eat. I'm stuck in this hotel for the night - not a bad thing - and I brought in leftover dinner from the other night.

That and I had this sneaking feeling something like this would happen so I have my gourmet cheese, mustard and sausage my oldest brother sent as a Christmas gift, dining on that and then heating up dinner.  I've been more relying on simply modifying dishes at restaurants to fit my Keto needs.  Not tonight!  So anyway, what I have is good enough.

I'm absolutely dreading tomorrow morning.  I mean, I was keeping warm out there and that without half the gear I have with me, I'll be putting the rest of that stuff on in the morning.  But my face? I can't be having the wind doing that to me. 

I'll figure it out tho.  I"ma get them to get this done as fast as possible.  It would actually be nice if the cold did something to their plant and I head to the Holiday Inn on the company dime.  One can wish.  I'm amazing they work outside in this frigid cold.  At least half of what they do is outdoor activities. 

Well, I decided to leave the truck running tonight.  There is no sense in shutting it off and risking it not being able to start in the morning.  The thing has plenty of fuel and its better to simply leave it run.  I would have had it running all night anyway if I had decided to stay in it.  No difference. 

Nothing else of note on this trip for now.  I do hope the truck has no issues running.  The tank liquid gauge is showing 55 inches - which is not possible, so I'm hoping that's just a trick the cold is playing on it.  It was showing 36 earlier, which is a bit high but nothing out of this world. It just shows the amount of liquid in the tank, the pressure is what you really have to pay attention to and in this cold? It's not going up at all. 

Yummmm. That roast pork is just as delicious tonight as it was 2 nights ago! So happy to have a hot meal to eat on a cold winter's night. 

My trip to Walmart netted me hunter's version of thermals for my legs.  I didn't have any. I'm not standing out in that cold without leg warmth, too. I am also not going to risk driving through all of that region without enough warm enough clothing to stay warm if the truck were to break down, or perhaps get caught in a traffic snarl and run out of fuel, or whatever.  $30 worth of insurance well spent in my view.  It also netted me these hand and feet warmer things. I was hoping they had them.  You just break them open and they keep your hands and toes warm for about 20 minutes per pack.
And I bought a much larger cap for my head, fully insulated.  I got what I could that I don't already have and unfortunately, they didn't have anything remotely close to a ski mask and I wasn't driving 40 miles to get one.  I'll survive.  As long as the rest of my body is amply warm, I'm good. 

I have thermal tops, sweatshirts, small jackets and very heavy duty winter jacket.  I have both thermal and other types of extremely heavy duty sock that will keep my feet warm when coupled with normal socks.  I have gloves made for cryogenics - they are heavily insulated to keep your hands from burning if that 150 below liquid hits your hands.  I have everything I know that I need to have besides that face mask. 

My biggest concern, as always, being in extreme cold isn't how warm I'm going to stay. That's a high priority of course, but inside the truck it's warm and cozy while driving. It's the potential for ice on the road.  I've seen video after video after video of cars, pickups and trucks all bent out of shape on the sides of roads after hitting ice - including several jacknifed trucks. 

Jacknifing big no-no in trucking world. You do that, you are going to have a hard time finding another job unless it's proven it was someone else's fault that cause you into that position. 

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Dinner and laundry.  I make dinner when I'm home - I mean real dinner.  Like cooking roasts and spaghetti and such. I made them spaghetti yesterday at the same time making my own version of it. They scarfed 2 whole bottles of the stuff including an entire box of angel hair noodles.  Anyway, I made a large pork roast with some nice heavy whipping cream gravy made out of the drippings of the roast, very nice and no carbs.  A pan of potatoes for them - they were at the verge of going bad, not there but you could tell eat them now or throw them out.  That was very nice - I didn't eat any of them but they enjoyed them.  I had enough pork left over to have 2 days worth of meals for the road.  It's a 3 day trip - if I"m lucky depending on this weather.  Wait, no it's a 4 day trip.  2 up  2 back. 

We'll see. 35 plus below with wind chill factor, crazy.  My mom? Sent me numerous texts about - everything cold - after seeing my post on Facebook lol.  Mom will always be mom : )  Gonna have to make sure I make it back somewhere around mid year.  I've been derelict in making trips back, I just don't like doing it but once I'm there I certainly am enjoying myself. 

Anyway, my bag is packed.  I have several coats in the truck already.  But, thermal top, microfiber heavy "shirt", then a sweat shirt and the a very heavy coat. That should do it.  Finger and toe warmers.  I'm as ready as it's going to get. 

And with that, I"m offa here. 

Tuesday morning.
Blahhh.
It's cold (my version of it) and I don't feel like doing anything.
34 degrees - and yes I know how cold it is up north, that's their business, I don't live up north for several reasons, that being one of the major ones.  It's cold enough here for my bones. 
But, I'll likely get out front to rake leaves in order to get some exercise in. I might even pull the fire pit out there to warm up.  But that's not right now, I'm "busy" drinking morning coffee lol.

Upon checking this morning, my weight hadn't budged. Up or down.  I'll take it.  The way it's been going lately, it goes down, stays down for a bit, goes back up and then it takes  a dip to new lows.  It's just hard to swallow that I'm .9 pounds away from 199. 

And last night, I found out Shiratake noodles? Are disgusting.  They are a "great keto alternative to pasta". Gross.  Might as well go eat rotting food out of the trash can.  It was that bad.  I bought a box of the stuff, it comes in plastic pouches, stored in liquid until you open it. You drain the liquid, dump the noodles into boiling water for a couple minutes, then drain it again and wash it with cold water and then.....you put it in a pan to try and dry it out.  I did all of that. GROSS.  I mean, just plain nasty.

There are some odd recipes for Keto and at least half of them that I have tried end up being disgusting dishes that I won't repeat.  But, fortunately, some of them are delicious. It's not a particularly easy diet to follow just because of the limitations of foods that you can eat, but since I've had such great success on it - down 28 pounds now and lots of fat gone - I'm going to keep with it. 

Today, I haven't figured out what to make yet.  I have a full pork roast in the fridge, but I'm not sure I want pulled pork.  Maybe a recipe I found that just cooks it in a crock pot for 4 hours, then put on certain spices and put it in the oven to finish it out and give a nice texture on the coat and then, a nice gravy made solely with heavy whipping cream and the juices from the roast. 

________________________

And so I finally got a run - and of course it would be going up north/east.  It's not as bad as Minnesota but it's still cold and it's driver unload so I"m going to have to be prepared to wear a lot of layers of clothing to stand out in that stuff for 2 plus hours.  Stryker, Ohio, btw, a small nothing town out in the middle of nowhere, but east of the really bad arctic vortex they are saying is coming further west.

Well I take that back, it's going to be minus 16 there tomorrow but I won't be there tomorrow. I will be there on Thursday - Lord willing - and it will be "warmer" at minus 1 degree - we unload up there early morning, before the sun comes up, it will be bitter cold and if it's windy, it's really going to suck.  I think they sell these warmer things to keep your hands warm, like you break them open but I doubt they sell them around here.  Well the weather forecast says "bitter cold" yeah I believe that actually, out in the dark, windy, -3? I think I'll go to walmart and at least see if they have any ski masks.  I have thermals at least, and other various layers of clothing I can put on to help from getting frost bite.  But yeah, before it gets too late in the day, I'm going up there now. 

My texting with the manager today resulted in no work tomorrow.

The first text series was that her computer was down, she'd have to get back to me later.

She didn't get back to me later, as expected, so I got back to her. Did your computer system ever come back up?  No loads until Wednesday.  That's 4 days off.  I informed her I had already been off 2 days and she said she knew. No explanations, just that's the way it is.  

4....more....days.....off.  And this person is hiring more drivers?  So I checked this competitor's site i was referring to the other day that is taking some of our business.  Their current job list doesn't have any Ethylene positions.  So I wrote them an email instead asking if they think they might have any positions open in the near future.  

No idea on that one.  But worth checking out. Two major haulers that go into the plant I go into - Groendyke and Martin - simply do not have a good reputation and they don't pay that well.  So I'm not even going to bother checking with them, but I have heard some good things about GenX haulers, so that is next.  

I can deal with 2 days off in between runs, I cannot deal with 4, 5 and 6 days off on a continuing basis. That's just not something I can sustain for any length of time.  I'm also going to apply with Gemini - they haul fuel for all the Love's Truck Stops around the nation.  The driver I spoke with says he has good off time, never out overnight and makes around 75k per year.  That would work for me, tho they'd have to be interested in teaching fuel delivery. 

Okay, their application appears to be quite long and involved.  Most of them are, unfortunately.  Anyway, after hearing that from her earlier, I have decided it's time to go full tilt looking for a new job.  Learn my lesson from Ferguson and not wait around - while going broke -forever.  I'll be doing that tomorrow.  I just came to this conclusion a little while ago and then started looking at openings available in my area.  

Well well well. The dogs and I were sitting in here minding our own business earlier when I heard a crunching noise. Sounded like one of the dogs eating dog food.  Looking across the room? There was a mouse in Addler's food bowl, right there, in front of us, chowing away!  I have all kinds of glue traps left over from when this house was infested with rats.  We got rid of them long ago. I had seen a mouse running into my room a few weeks ago, but it seemed like the cats had dealt with that issue.  Funny there are mice in here anywhere with 2 cats lurking around.  I let them come into my room at will to look around and establish their presence.

Anyway, I put out a huge rat trap - that's what I have lol, the glue kind, those giant ones are the only ones that will keep a big rat on it without letting it go - and now? I have an itty bitty mouse in it.  But where there's one mouse there's more, so I'm letting it sit there and make it's noise. I'm curious if it's calling its friends for help. They can most certainly come and save him!  He's sitting smack dab in that glue, no way he's getting out of there tho.  

Well, anyway, the news about not working until Wednesday was disconcerting.  But motivating.  I absolutely hate the idea of quitting yet another job and starting up again somewhere else, but what am I supposed to do? I will ask, tho, about getting transferred over to fuel delivery.  It's worth a shot, I just don't think they pay as much.  

Well, my manager just told me "it's fixing to get better".  That would be very nice.  She is short on specifics tho.  Why does she believe it's going to get better? Does she have information she could pass on? Why keep everyone in the dark? It makes no sense.  So how long should I hold out? A week? A month?  Months? Just weird that this job gave me more work than I wanted at one time and now - every single driver - is experiencing the fact that we are sitting around - a lot.  2 34 hour resets in a week is not normal in the driving field but that's what's happening with everyone.  

Okay, I'm going to hold out a little longer.  The worst that could happen is resorting to credit cards again - bad idea but it's available if it got that bad - and deal with it.  That's a worst case scenario.  I have lots of savings right now, but that can get eaten up quickly if the paychecks aren't cutting it....

and with that, I have a mouse to deal with. I was going to let it sit there calling it's friends but the racket is getting ridiculous.

......edited - the racket worked and now two of them in the same trap - itty bitty things, there's probably a whole family of those suckers.  

This diet is really strange how it works.  I get down to 202, then up to 207, then 205, then 203, then back to 202. 

These readings are taken first thing in the morning after I get up.  It isn't the only time during the day that I take a reading if I'm at home, but it is the one experts recommend to use because it shows your actual weight before eating and such occurs during the day.  I take readings later in the day to see what the high weight is as well. That has been steadily going down over the last 3 months that I have been on the Keto diet. 

My high at the beginning was 228 pounds.  That was the point where I was very uncomfortable in size 35 jeans and was going to go out and by a whole set of 36's, but that's also the point when I said no to myself, I'm going to lose the weight.  My friends wanted to diet as well and the lady friend is actually the one that got me started on Keto - she quit the diet long ago.  It isn't an easy diet to follow because you have to keep your daily carb intake to 20 or less to get into ketosis and stay in ketosis.

When you can't eat your favorite foods - paste, rice, bread, sugars, potatoes, well, you really have to stay focused on the long run and the ultimate success of getting your weight managed, eliminating any possibility of late-in-life diabetes and reducing other health risks related to obesity or extremely or even moderately overweight.  I've read countless stories of people going off of the injections for diabetes - which are very costly btw - or even getting rid of the disease altogether on this diet.  I have heard from people saying doctor's actually instructed them to go on the Keto diet or some version of a low carb diet.  It's the sugars that will kill you. 

America is way too far in love with fast food.  I see Dairy Queens and Whataburgers in most towns I go through, even the tiny little ones.  McDonald's and Wendy's abound as well.  But beyond that is high sugar drinks, even ones that label themselves as healthy.  You start looking at carb counts and sugars in those drinks - it's ghastly.  And the money they want for those drinks!  It is highly likely that I will be making the Keto diet a go to for maintaining weight for the rest of my life.  I may not stay on it forever, it likely will be a on and off type of thing.  There's lots of controversy about this diet but I've read that even doctors use it to keep their weight down.

Anyway I finally hit 200 pounds this morning.  I haven't been at this weight in years.  A call to celebrate? Not just yet.  I went to get below 200 before taking a day or two of eating my favorite food just for once - and then going back on Keto.  I may gain weight back doing that, but it won't be enough to deter me from proceeding forth to finish this journey out and at least get into the 180's range - unless my body just says no, 190's is fine.  I'm good with that as well.  I just want the percentage of body fat down to acceptable range and not anywhere where I might get disqualified on my medical card for my CDL. 

As for today, it's Monday morning going on afternoon.  I have stuff to do before hopefully going out on a run tomorrow.  I'm just hopeful it isn't a Mapleton run - that would have me up there in the are where it's going to be 20 or more below zero on Wednesday.  I mean, I"ll take it if nothing else available.........I've got thermals, I've got all kinds of cold weather gear, but I'm afraid that with those temps, no amount of clothing is really going to protect you from the bitter cold.  I was in that cold in Massachusetts last year - 17 below - with wind blowing - you felt like you were naked when you got out of the truck.  I wouldn't turn it down tho because paychecks are more important and as long as the truck runs?  It will stay warm in there.  I think.  Actually, in cold that low, you really have to put a cover over the front grill to keep air from flowing into the engine compartment.  You don't turn the truck off - at all. And you hope the fuel doesn't gel up, tho nowadays they add treatment to the fuel at the truckstops so you don't have to. 

And for that, a run to Walmart.  Out of dog food and other things I need. 

So now, Rene saying she is leaving at the end of March to go live in Michigan leaves this whole house rental thing up in the air.  The lady that just recently moved in there is really nice and has a very good attitude about most things that I have seen thus far.  She also has nowhere to go.  The fact that she has 2 dogs makes it difficult to find a rental unit that will take her. 

We've had the discussion about her staying and running the place and then I will still have a place to take the dogs - she was more than agreeable to that.  But the thing for me is, I don't really want to sign another 1 year long contract in April. This whole setup was to help "friends" that have totally turned their backs on me.  Donny turned out to be a drug addict and tho we gave him numerous chances to clean up his act and encouraging him to get help - of which he could have gotten for free - he refused and kept smoking crack.

Rene - has terrible temper problems. She is not a well adjusted person.  She doesn't get along with other people well.  She's the type of person that needs to have animals and live alone.  That's the end of that story.  And when she gets drunk, it gets really bad. This texting nonsense started out of the thin blue air. When I started reading them, I instantly knew she was drinking.  And as it played out, her calling me all kinds of names and cussing me out etc etc etc, I just came to the conclusion it was time to wash my hands of her. Let her go to Michigan, put up no fuss, c'ya later, have a good time, don't come back - type of deal.

Now, whether I want to continue this with this other lady will depend on whether the owner of the house wants to allow this situation to continue and whether I have to sign another year lease.  I could see signing a 3 month lease and just doing it that way, that limits my exposure to loss.  But an entire year? I just won't do that.  I have a little time to think this through - if - Rene keeps her word and actually stays til' April.  But I'm not putting any merit to anything she says at this point and she can leave at any time.  I have another person coming to look at the room today - but - I will not have Rene handling it.  Maria will deal with it and hopefully get that room rented before the beginning of the month. 

There is one thing tho about all of this pertaining to that particular house: that place was for sale for a long, long time.  They couldn't get a buyer.  It had been for rent for 3 months, I believe, before we came along and said we'll take it.  We have paid the rent on time, every time, every month.  I write a check at the beginning of the month, they give me cash when their government benefits come in.  At least that has worked out if nothing else.  One month - December - I ended up eating all the rest of it tho.  The utilities, the wifi and the satellite.  Just because of that, tho, I'm leaning towards exiting this deal.  The only other thing that might make me look at it a bit differently is if they would bring the rent down. It's way too high for the size of a house it is, considering the market. At $800, I can get a much larger house with better insulation and less utility bills. 

Ok, just collecting my thoughts here. I'm still at this hotel, it's Sunday morning and I have no desire to leave here yet.  Checkout time is noon, I have plenty of time to sit here in the quiet, listen to nothing and just think.  I'm also 67 miles from home and don't particularly feel like driving. 

Between this situation with Rene and work, I'm just a bit overloaded right now.  Work actually is getting to me more than any of this house nonsense.  My paychecks need to start looking normal again and very soon.  This next one coming up should be up there in that range.  I am writing down the details of every single trip now and logging it into a note thing on my phone for reference when I get paid.  I'm pretty sure I've been shafted on some pay, but for some reason I'm having to jump through hoops now to get the driver settlement sheets that they used to automatically send.

I'm pretty sure I'm going to go to work tomorrow and sit down in the manager's office and have a discussion about all of this.  She apparently is getting mad at people telling her that these loaner drivers need to go back to their division, work or no work, they don't belong in ours.  But this idea of hiring another driver when we are slow? And 2 good drivers left because of it? It makes absolutely no sense at all.  I'm not going to just sit around and "take it" forever like I did at Ferguson.  I'm seriously considering applying at our new competitor since I'm hearing nothing but good about the person that owns the place and another person that runs the place.  Just the sticking point that I want to stay with Ethylene because that gets me home after every trip. No OTR junk. They may not have a position for Ethylene right now, but if I put in an app and request consideration for if they ever do have a position, at least it will be in there. 

I haven't heard back from UTP.  I dunno what their process is but it's been a bit of a while.  It would be nice if they would at least say yes or no.  I can take rejection, just be nice if that's their final conclusion. 

Annnd the weather here. Temps are going to drop tonight into the 20's - which is cold for us - and rain tomorrow.  In fact, looks like rain for the next 8 days.  Meanwhile, the entire world of the United States is still erupting about this wall of Trump's.  And the "fact" that he "caved".  I wasn't happy with his decision to reopen the government for 3 weeks - but - that's  what it is.  It appears that if dems don't fund the wall after 3 weeks, he's going to declare a national emergency and fund the wall that way.  And then? Lawsuits holding it up forever in the courts.  He has built a compelling case of the last few months with all the border experts showing with facts and numbers that absolute need to put up a physical barrier - they are now calling it - to stop the flow of illegal aliens from pouring across our borders.  And now, it is reported a caravan of 10,000 of them are heading this way. So, we are to do nothing, dems say, because - in reality - it's hate Trump.  And that's all it is, lmao.

I was going to go to a Waffle House and get keto breakfast.  But they don't have one here, which is odd considering I'm right next to I-30 and this is a big enough town to be able to warrant one here.  There's no Denny's here either, which isn't so odd cause' Denny's isn't everywhere. There is an IHOP . Not the biggest fan but when you're ordering bacon, sausage, a slice of ham and eggs, it's pretty hard to screw that up.  Yes I'm still on the diet, I've only been seeing minimal gains but gains are gains.  My weight just seems to fluctuate up and down from 201 to 207.  I started working out with weights but abandoned that idea - temporarily anyway - until they get their puppy under control. It craps on the porch, all around the weight bench. The porch gets loaded with dog crap and I ain't subjecting myself to that.  I'm going to suggest we move the weight bunch to underneath the carport in the back. The dog isn't crapping there.  I want to work out, 3 times per week, 2 would be enough tho. 

Even tho the weight loss isn't too much, the fat loss still continues on.  I can only surmise that the working out I did do built muscle, adding weight but losing fat weight at the same time.  I want to really pump up my arms and chest, I just think I look dreadful at the moment with a flabby chest and small arms - tho I will say that the workouts I did do did, indeed, pump my arms up. But they won't stay that way if I don't continue on with the workouts, hence I will suggest today we move the weight bench. 

And with that, I am offa here. Have another cup of coffee and think about driving home. 

Woke up this morning - in Brownsville of course - got hooked up to the trailer and took off. Developed a headache.  Nothing brain killing but it went on throughout the day. I slept well last night, but I didn't get enough sleep - that because of the night before and getting 3 hours of sleep. That's the kind of thing that can mess with me for days. 

Well, this thing nagging at me, I forced myself to drive to the yard, get the truck unhooked from the trailer, do my paperwork and email it through the scanner in the office and then? I went into the still running truck and went to sleep for a while . No, I did not head home, I had to get a nap, it was getting bad. 

But....I was in the office with another driver and he was griping endlessly about the work situation. He's been there a long long time.  He was complaining about our manager - and yes, there are legitimate complaints. But he clued me in on some of the stuff she does that is ridiculous.  It's way too much for me to type in tonight, maybe some other time, just that she is really absent minded. I have noticed this for a while now.  You say something to her, she forgets and does something different than what you asked.  She has a really bad memory.  Even the people at the loading plant have issues with her memory issues.  

But the thing that really got me going? This driver told me she was interviewing a person to become another driver! What the hills full of dog crap sand is this? We don't need any more drivers! AT ALL!!!!  We literally do NOT need a single driver, we need to get rid of some drivers.  "Well, he's only going to do the Baker run". Who cares? The Baker run isn't a gold mine but it's good enough if there is nothing else going on. Far better than Cheneire and the casino - when the impulse hits me - is on the way back.  Note I didn't say on the way up. It is on the way up, but that run you go up to Baker, drop and hook, and the make it back to the casino that night.  

I'm just leaving my options open at the moment.  I want to see if she will keep me busy after having a conversation with her about it, but I suspect this has nothing to do with her and everything to do with switching over to a new company.  If I'm not on track to making a minimum of 75k this year, I will be finding greener pastures.  

Two days off - starting tomorrow.  I don't want 2 days off. At most, right now, with my financial situation, one day at most.  I'm really ready to go back out tomorrow morning. That isn't going to happen but that's where I'm at. I will text my manager on Monday morning - when am I going out again? I will probably escalate this tho. Why are we all sitting around for days at a time and you are allegedly hiring more drivers?  Fear of an employer has never been a problem, tho I respect her as a person she is a very nice lady.  But nice doesn't pay the bills....

So what am I going to do for 2 days? I have no idea.  There's plenty of housework to do.  I really need to get my 4 wheeler fixed and take it out down at the Sabine river and do some riding.  

But.....the situation with Rene? UNBELIEVABLE.  She started texting me last night about how evil I am that I let Jeff "stay" because "all you care about is getting the rent paid". Notwithstanding the fact that she agreed to let Jeff stay, without any input from me about it, saying they had worked it out and hence, all would be fine, over two freaking months ago. She was drunk and called me a "jackazz" at least a dozen times. I maintained my composure excepting to tell her she is drunk - several times actually. Because she was totally pissing me off.  I've bent over backwards helping this person, seriously and literally have done everything in my ability to help her out - and this is the thanks I get? Screw that.  I blocked her on my phone eventually, she wasn't going to shut up and I wasn't going to have anything to do with it. 

It got bad enough that I asked James to go over there and get my dogs.  And that he did.  He went straight over there, got them and brought them home.  Yes, they would watch my dogs while I"m gone, no, I really don't want to do that to them, they have enough on their plates.  Tho, James absolutely loves Addler.  He rough houses with Addler all the time.  Gets Addler into a headlock and eventually gets Addler on the ground lol.  No, there is no pain or animal abuse, thanks.  It's playing, but Addler is a tough dog, that boy can handle some stuff.  Not that James is hurting him in any way.  Just to say that they are in very good hands. 

And, Rene declared she was leaving for Michigan.  Okay, Bon Voyage!! Hasta luego, taco baby!  Don't let the get shove your ass the rest of the way out when you leave! No, I didn't say any of that, but it came to mind sitting there reading endless texts condemning me as the devil himself. 

No good deed goes unpunished. Try to help people in life? Sometimes you see positive results, other times, definitely not so much.  But per the former, Mark and Lynnette are a good example of helping people and them? Helping themselves after getting their lives back in order. 

Whatever. I've had enough of her.  

And...it's late. I went off to a hotel to sit and think about things. Away from driving endlessly on the road and away from a noisy house where such meditation may not be impossible, but not exactly likely when the kids are going off.  It wasn't the most affordable thing to do in light of current situation at work, but it was definitely the right thing for me. Time to go to sleep.  

I woke up last night in the middle of the night - and was never able to get back to sleep.  I worked all day today on maybe 3 hours of sleep. The funny part about it? I wasn't sleepy most of the day.  In fact, I had some energy coming from somewhere that had me cranking all day long.  I don't mean cranking on drugs, either, lol, whatever was going on I had enough energy to drive 465 miles, stop for fuel and mandatory 30 minute breaks and finish the rest of the 120 miles out.  I thought that extraordinary. I have driven on that little amount of sleep before, it's usually agony and hellish. 

Very disappointed to get down here and see not one, but 2 trailers sitting in the yard.  If there hadn't been one here, I would have had to wait until Monday morning, a scenario I was really hoping would happen. 

Not the end of the world, tho I'll be home tomorrow/Saturday night and then sit another 2 days cause she sent me nothing for Monday.  I didn't expect her to, but one can hope.

Meanwhile, shit going down at the other house.  Rene has a penchant for calling the police when the police don't need to be called. Jeff, the male tenant that allegedly does crank and is leaving at the end of the month, was allegedly doing it today - tho he wasn't doing it at the house.  They have no proof and he isn't acting out. 

Ahhh, now I get it: Rene is drunk.  And off in lah lah land. And going off on me in text messaging and I'm now ignoring her.  She is going to move to Michigan, she says and okay, whatever.  So, now this new lady - really sweet - recovering addict but really on the right path - wants to take over.  I mean, she doesn't do any drugs or anything.  I mean, I really don't need to do this, I can leave the dogs at home, but they would be out on there own for 10 hours a day.  They're animals, yes, but dogs will tend to get into trouble when left alone for long periods of time.  Aspyn will just jump over the fence and terrorize the neighborhood, Addler will pee all over everything, tho that's the extend of his evils lmao.

So, while I'm writing this, I'm texting this lady and trying to get this done. She will watch my dogs - she has 2 of her own. 

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The situation with Rene got so bad - she's drunk - that I asked Taylor if she or James would go get my dogs.  She is blaming me for getting that guy in there - even tho she talked to him in person before he moved in. You can't always hit it right, that guy is gone in 5 days, but me? I'm the devil in her eyes and because she is drunk.  She claims she isn't drunk, but I lived with her for 2 years and I know when her texts show she has drank too much. Not to mention that the other lady living there confirmed it.

Whatever. I blocked her. I won't continue to engage with that nonsense. I have helped her out endlessly and this is the thanks I get.  No good deed goes unpunished, as the old saying goes.

And with that, I"m offa here, going to calm myself down and go to sleep. 

Government shutdown day 34.  Both measures - Trump's and Democrats = shot down in the Senate.  The bickering, the yelling and the anger is heating up.  Both sides are hunkered down, but people are starting to mad at all of them, the whole lot, not one side or the other, both sides that are unable to simply do the jobs they were voted in to deal with.  IN all of this, Democrats have flatly said no to any negotiations.  I mean, nothing. It's their way or the highway.  Trump is now offering a "down payment" on the wall offer.  There is only one thing that Democrats care about in all of this nonsense: regaining power in the White House in 2020.  If Trump gets a wall win, they lose more footing.  It's all identity politics and has nothing to do with governing the nation.  If they all don't figure this out soon, they will all be losers.  That's my prediction for 2020, they best get this situation dealt with, fast.

I could give my thoughts on the kid and the indian but why bother.  It became obvious after the firestorm that erupted against those kids that - the media was completely and totally wrong.

The accusation about Trump and Cohen was also brought quickly, the media fell for it, it took Mueller's team to refute it.  It simply shows the mindsets of the liberal media. They don't care to corroborate stories any more, they just fall for the next narrative and blast it out, true or not.
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Thursday. Yet another day I didn't want to sit home - cause' honey, I need to be making money right now.
A pleasant surprise, I guess.  I actually have a paycheck coming tonight - small one, very small but better than nothing.  I have no clue what it's from. I was unwillingly off for 6 days which reflects that lack of a paycheck. I can only surmise being paid back for them ripping me off from another paycheck earlier.

So, anyway, I texted my manager. When am I going out again?  I am surmising other drivers are getting the same "treatment" because there's not enough work to go around, from what they've told me.  An hour later, hearing nothing back, I threw in an ?.  She said hold on, I'm trying to see if they'll let a new trailer in down there.

2 hours later, she sends me a run, going to Brownsville - with a new trailer. This will be the first time we send one of those down there.  Not preferable for obvious reasons.  They steal tires, lights, brass, whatever off of them things.  Not every single time, but when it happens, well, you've got a mess on your hands that you have to fix.  I can only assume there isn't an old trailer in the yard to be able to use.  But, I get a run, that will take me into Saturday night at least.  I guess I"ll be sitting another 2 days. Better than 6 I guess, but I'll be asking her if I have a run for Monday anyway before Friday is over with.

I spent so much time fooling with vehicles and other things yesterday, I decided to do little to nothing today.  An hour spent prepping a crock pot stew and making lunch, built a fire, and that has been it.

Wednesday/home.
I don't want to be home too long tho. I need more runs to make some decent paychecks to make up for the last two weeks lack of much of anything.  And the coveted detention pay isn't happening.  No guarantees on that anyway, just nice when it does happen. A brownsville run on the weekend sometimes guarantees that.  If I get sent down there on a Friday or a Saturday and there are no trailers, none will show up til monday as the port is closed on the weekend where the trucks come through.  Anyway, I'll be texting my manager around 1 or 2 pm to nudge her that yes, I'm here, no I don't want to stay home, yes please send me out somewhere. 

Very disconcerting tho that the 2 "loaner" drivers won't be leaving.  Get rid of those 2 plus the 2 that just left and that would open up a lot of runs and keep the rest of us much busier.  I can only hope that more people will quit or switch to another division.  Cause they aren't getting those runs back anytime soon and another company has moved in to try and take as much of it as possible. In fact, I've heard nothing but good about that other company.  I'm thinking of applying there if/when I finally come to the conclusion that this place isn't going to work. And if I keep getting paychecks like I did last week and nothing this week, well, that won't take long. 

Anyway, I do want to be home, lol, just money takes precedence at the moment. I think I'll keep home activities light today as well.  I'm thinking I really need to get that Jeep into the shop tho and get that issue fixed on it so I can use it while I have the SUV in the shop and get the struts/shocks replaced.  Yes, I think I'll see if the shop a mile away will do it today. 

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Lovely.  The Jeep was cheap, just $47 to get that situation taken care of. Then down the road to get it inspected for state inspection.  Had to have a few things done to it, but got out of there cheap enough and passed inspection.  Now - the expensive thing. My struts are toast on the SUV.  It's a seesaw when it hits even a minor bump.  The shop I was at quoted me $1,500 and change.  Lol.  "We offer financing".  Okay buds.  I'll check around first, I thought, and get quotes from a few other shops and also look up the parts online.  Well, the each strut is almost $200 a piece.  Some electronic air bag type of thing.  So there's $800 worth of parts when including tax just for the parts.  I dunno about $700 worth of labor.  I was watching a video to see how hard they are to replace, I've done this before. 

It's neither easy nor hard.  Well it can be really hard depending on the vehicle.  I only watched a few minutes of the video tho.  You have to take a bunch of stuff off to get at the strut and the new ones come with the complete strut assembly.  I dunno what I'm going to do yet - but it needs to be done.  I have a call into another shop and awaiting a quote. 

So that all cost me hours worth of my day. And the other place called me back, and even steeper price at $1,700.  But now I find out it's just regular struts, it's not these expensive electronic ones of the air bags.  So I'd have something like $500 in parts to do it myself.  I may very well decide to put the thing in the back yard, back the whole thing up, take all wheels off and have at it.  I dunno, just gonna sit on this for a little bit and think about it.  Lots of time would be involved but to save a grand? 

Well, in another headache, I've had to tell the male tenant in the house to get out.  He's cranking on meth and we don't tolerate that crap.  It may end up costing me tho, I currently have all 3 rooms rented out. He's gone on the 31st, I'm hopeful to find someone by then, but who knows.  That guy has been the source of a lot of conflict, tho, I'm kinda glad to see him go even if the money goes with him.  He's got Hepatits C and Rene complains she's caught him drinking out of the milk carton and sticking his fingers into community food.  He consumed the rest of her birthday cake - she had a slice and the other lady had a slice - and left only one slice left. 

So, life never gets boring, but sometimes it poses headaches.  Meanwhile, my lady friend here is going through here

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And more.  I'm pretty well involved in this family when I'm here.  I cook a lot too.  Even my Keto diet stuff they'll eat.  I tried out a meatloaf tonight.  The ingredients for the meat part were kind of funky, but I did it anyway.  However, the ingredients for the red sauce on the top? Tasted nasty.  After adding a lot of sugar free ketchup to it, well now then. Coated the top of it with half the mixture, cooked it, coated it with the rest of the mixture after that? Delicious!  It really turned out much better than I thought it would.  James at half the pan lol.  Taylor was having a bad day and didn't eat anything. 

Well I didn't get sent a run, so I'll eat tomorrow but I'm going to insist on getting sent out on Friday. 

Currently in the great state of Missouri, Neelysville to be exact, at the Arkansas state line.  No detention, no detention pay.  I was not bummed out by that, tho, considering the forecast in Illinois where I was at.  90% chance of rain and it's well below zero.  Freezing rain?  Icy roads? No thanks. We got that thing unloaded and I got the Hercules out of there heading as far south as I could as fast as I could - which isn't very fast in a truck governed at 65 MPH, but I didn't stop for anything but to look for a charging cord for my phone. 

The one I was using quit working.  They only last about 3 months.  It's a pretty good scam ATT has.  They sell charging cords at their "official" stores but the cords aren't manufactured by ATT and the warranty isn't ATT, it's through the manufacturer.  You already know when you buy that cord that it isn't going to last anything near the declared warranty period and you also know that when the damn thing stops working, you are going to throw it in the trash and go buy a new one.  I don't buy cords at the ATT store anymore. I have found places that sell them that work just as well and last just as long and cost much less. 

I like the concept of a smart phone, I am very set back by the costs associated with any of it.  There are cell providers that have really good deals, but their coverage sucks.  The only real, nationwide coverage you are going to find is Verizon.  I had thought ATT, being a huge company, would up their game over time and get good coverage everywhere. They have definitely NOT done that, I can attest to multiple, large numbers of places I have gone that have little or even no coverage at all. For the price I am paying, that is unacceptable. 

Whatever the case, I think I am clear of any rain.  Even if not, the temps here are much higher - high 20's - than what was going
on in Illinois.  I haven't checked the forecast in this region, do that later. 

I spent last night in a truck stop in a very small town off the beaten path - I have an app that finds these places.  I wanted to go there to watch the Patriots v KC game. There is a sports bar next door to the truckstop. I ended up texting mom for the entire length of the game I was there watching it - she's a huge NFL fan and watches all the playoff games.  It was 12 degrees when I got out of the truck to walk over to the bar. I came prepared with thermal socks, hat, gloves, thermal top and of course a very heavy winter coat.  So, not bad actually.  The game was fun to watch, I'm not a fan of either team but I wanted Patriots to lose badly, I've seen enough of them in Superbowls, but Brady is just too good. I think he may go down as the best quarterback in NFL history after the books are closed on him. KC made some outstanding plays, no doubt, they stayed in the running all the way up to the end, but in the end, Brady outdid them and Patriots won.

It was fun texting with mom and I have been making a point of it lately to make sure we talk to some extend every day.  She's old and lonely.  I"m not saying that in a bad way, she just is. She has lived too much of her life alone and now she is regretting it.  She is a wonderful mom and a very wonderful lady in general. Very easy to get along with. I think she goes to the AA meetings to have some kind of connection with society more than the need to deal with alcoholism - she hasn't had a drink in at least 40 years.  More than that.  In other words, at least in my view, she is not an alcoholic. 

I love her dearly and I think about some of the things she has been saying. I think if she brings it up again, I'll the "if you come to the point you need to live with" someone, I'll do it - but - I am not moving back to Arizona.  She'll lose her mountain trips but that is going to happen sooner or later anyway.  I'm guessing about the time she can't drive anymore she'll be reaching out for help. Don't read that wrong, I am in no way shape or form wishing that upon her, at all. It's awesome she's as old as she is and can still drive and live on her own.  But.... the day.....is ...coming.  Just another reason it would be great to have 50 or more acres of property. Might not be in the mountains but the area is definitely wooded.  Actually I think she'd like it where I live, just not the town, out in the country. 

Well it's cold here, lol.  If I were out 4 wheeling or hunting or something outdoors, I wouldn't care. Anything else? Especially working? No thanks..  But I resisted the idea of getting a hotel and am staying in the truck. And for once, at this truckstop, my internet has at least enough signal strength to operate the internet. Which isn't say much. As much as I despise Verizon customer service, they do have the superior service when it comes to reception pretty much anywhere you go. 

And so, I will be home tomorrow afternoon - around 4 or 5.  I would prefer to get sent back out the next day, as my finances have taken a beating with that 6 day off time I didn't ask for or want and a small paycheck before that - but - I know how this is going now.  I was given a rave review of another company that has come in and taking over some of our company's clientele. The owner of the company apparently is very caring and helpful towards employees, whether company drivers or owner operators.  I haven't filled out an application - yet - I'm still going to wait for a while to see what goes on here.  But I won't wait forever, lesson learned. Still, if about 3 more people were to leave, I would be getting as much work as I need.

Well, there's more, actually, but I got involved in a lengthy discussion about this Native American fiasco and these kids that were wrongfully accused in the totally biased media .... that don't engage in real journalism anymore ...

G'nite. 

Yesterday, at around 1:00 pm, I texted my manager.  No way was I going to give any ground for her to "forget" that I need a run this weekend.  Friday's paycheck was abysmal and next paycheck will have $0.00 because of her mistake last weekend.  She texted back yes, in the affirmative of my question about getting a run.

Well, 6:00 pm comes around and I still haven't received anything so I texted her again - informing her of last paycheck's amount and next paycheck's amount -- which will be nothing. She said she sent one at 3:30. I never received it and obviously she never sent it, cause magically, 2 texts showed up with the same run.  I was disappointed I was going out today/Saturday, let's get this thing rolling, but I wasn't disappointed that it's a minimum 3 day run with the occasional prospect of detention time. 

Mapleton, Illinois.  And looking at the weather stats? It's freaking cold up there!  26 degrees up there right now, feels like 15.  And going down to 6 degree tonight.  I know, some people think that's a warm summer's day, I'm not one of those people.  Fortunately, I do not have to unload the trailer at that place and I can stay indoors where it's nice and toasty. Detention or not, it's a good run with decent pay.  I could conceivably get back in time for a short trip somewhere, doubt it tho.  Not the way loads are being handed out right now.  I'll be lucky if I don't have to sit 2 days when I get back.

Looks like I'm going to miss that storm that is sweeping across the nation up there, thankfully.  Snowing today in that entire region but by the time I get up there, the roads should be clear. 

Oh well, another day off.  I love off time, but not when my finances are being affected by too much of it. 

Smoked some lovely pork ribs yesterday.  I really love smoking meats and have gotten pretty good at it now.  Smoke for 3 hours or so, then put pats of butter on top of the meat, wrap it up in foil or red butcher paper made specifically for smoking and either put it back in the smoker or just throw it in the oven for the rest of the cooking.  Purists will continue to leave it in the smoker, even tho the meat is receiving no smoke. It's just easier to set the oven at whatever temp - depending on how much time you have - and finish out in there.  I didn't have much time available so I set it at 325. Around dinner time, the ribs came out perfect.  Pulled back up the bones, softy, tender and juicy.  Delicious smoked flavor with the perfect seasonings. 

No smoking ambitions today, it's my version of cold outside coupled with wind and I have no desire to freeze.  Now, I could build a pit fire and deal with the cold, but I really just feel like staying in doors today.  I'l have plenty of time out in cold, potentially icy road conditions coming up, a day hibernating is not a bad thing  Plus I'm thinking to rearrange my room. 

I don't like where I have my dresser and I want to move it to another location which I think will make it blend into the design of the room much nicer.  I kind of regret buying all those framed pictures the other day in light of my paycheck situation. They are all hung perfectly and no taking them back tho lol.  I also bought a nice little stand for my Keurig machine in the bathroom, tho if I move the dresser, I should be able to build the stand and put it where the dresser was along with another piece of furniture - of which I don't particular like but right now is not a good time to go furniture shopping. I also want a new futon and replace this old thing.  That's about $160 plus shipping and tax - again - not a good time.  I could, of course, put it on a credit card and not delve into my checking account.

Could but won't.  My Christmas balances have been transferred over to my Citi card at a much lower rate, I intend on paying that off in the next couple of months - if - work picks up or at least holds out to what I'm doing now.  Anything less and I'll have decisions to make.  As it stands, I've put in some applications and there may be decisions to make anyway. 

Results of just 2 workouts have been amazing.  Enough so that it absolutely motivates me to keep pumping that iron.  It was the inevitable second phase of the diet.  I dunno if I'm just not going to lose any more weight or if I'm at a "new" ideal weight or what, but I'm stuck at 202 pounds.  199 pounds - which would have been a nice milestone to hit - has been elusive.  I'm basically 15 to 20 pounds off from where I wanted to be.  The only thing I can think of to do now is just really cut back on caloric intake.  Maybe 1000 per day range. 

___________

Well, new set of Ketosis strips. Finally back into full fledged ketosis.  Not really sure what threw me out, but it seems it takes quite a while to get fully back into it. 

And with that, I think I'll get busy doing some cleaning and rearranging in my room. 

G'day. 

So now I'm seriously looking around for a new job - one that pays well, but I don't care if it's hazmat tankers or not.  I'd like to stay in this line of work, get the required experience and finish out my career in one of the local, family owned companies that basically only hire the cream of the crop.  But, in the real world, that may never happen.  A local job is top on my list, but not a deal breaker.  What I'm doing now is survivable since I get home after every trip.  So, I can do Regional but that's it.

There is a place advertising over 100k per year locally, but after looking at it, it's operating out of the Permian Basin.  I may apply there just to find out the parameters.  It''s all oilfield hauling, of which I have no experience but I can learn anything in the trucking industry.  None of this stuff is rocket science. Oh, well the Permian Basin is west Texas, I'm in east Texas.  So why they are advertising here I don't know, unless they're hauling over here to a refinery somewhere.  However, to earn 100k in trucking, you are either an owner operator - or you are on the road a lot as a company driver. They ain't giving that kind of money away without you living in the truck, I am guessing. 

I just applied at UPT - petroleum transport and that is all local or regional -- and am scouring for more.  They're based out of Shreveport, if it's the location I'm thinking of it's a petroleum refinery that isn't much further than I'm currently driving to get to the yard at the company I'm working at now. 

Anyway, today off - Friday.  No idea about this weekend but I will be texting my manager before 5:00 pm to find out.  I will not just "take it" for another 4 or more days off.  We've gotten rid of 2 drivers, that frees up at least 4 loads per week. Not much but anything helps right now.  This company really needs to deal with this situation, but after observing other terminals, they don't care how much work you get or don't get.  They just wash their hands of it, you can stay or go I guess.  Building this business means retaining your drivers, they aren't doing anything, whatsoever, to even try to start doing that at our terminal.  Perplexing, but not shocking.  This company simply doesn't have it's act together and they attempted a combining of 2 large companies together without having any clue, from my observations, of how to do it smoothly. 

Well, the circus goes on in Washington.  Blame shifting, Pelosi saying no SOTU until impasse is over, Trump retaliating by saying no military aircraft use by Pelosi until  - impasse is over.  It's amusing and ridiculous at the same time. I blame both sides now and they need to stop this nonsense, get their acts together, come up with a plan and get it over with. 

As for today, I'm going to spend a couple hours scouring more job ads and cleaning up around the yard and probably doing some more sprucing up in my room.  Since my paycheck today was pathetic and I won't be getting a paycheck next week, all expenditures besides bills and groceries are off the table.  If I even come close to having to dip into my savings account for monthly bills, I'm definitely off to a new job. That won't happen this month even if I didn't get another paycheck, but in the next 2 or 3 months, it would happen with this kind of checks going on. I'm not going to get backed into another Ferguson scenario where I can't pay my bills and going into credit card debt if I can help it. 

Well that was interesting.
Just got back from Brownsville - unfortunately no detention pay- there were 2 trailers waiting for me when I got down there.  But, when I pulled back in tonight, there were a bunch of drivers all sitting outside talking. I had 25 minutes of stuff to do, but when I got done I joined them.  2 drivers quit.  One of them there 6 years, another was standing there telling me about it.  The one standing there has been sitting around in the yard so much, he just couldn't deal with it anymore.  Actually, he's not quitting, he's transferring over to a different division.  18 down to 16.  It needs to go down to between 12 and 14 to keep us sufficiently busy. 

We've simply lost work to other trucking companies because of the period where we couldn't keep up with the demand last year, the production plant went out and solicited other companies to take up the slack. But they are taking more than the slack, they're taking a large chunk of what we used to do away from us.  And some of the prime, money making runs we aren't getting anymore. 

Now, if we could get rid of the 2 "loaner" drivers from another division, we might be getting somewhere.  But, apparently we can't.  The division where those drivers came from allegedly is so slow the manager didn't want them to come back. But, the story that came out tonight is that they were busy, but busy doing "callout" work - it's work where you are contracted out to a plant to do whatever they want you to do - and they didn't like it.

Well tough s***.  We don't need them.  I was wondering why I was busy around Christmas and New Year's - everyone went on vacation. But now? Back to the same old junk of not enough work and tonight - 13 of the 18 trucks sitting in the yard.  I'll be curious to see if I get a run this weekend.  I"m also curious to find out if anyone else is going to quit.  But, there are opportunities in other divisions, you don't have to quit to do those, but I am not interested in any of it excepting perhaps the gasoline division.  They're over in Shreveport.  I don't know what the pay is tho. The rest of the divisions I wouldn't be getting home much.

I dunno what to make of all of this.  I get so little information I feel like I'm totally in the dark.  My manager was complaining yesterday morning about all the bitching going on - they were texting her all weekend about it.  Drivers complaining about other drivers and people complaining about not having enough work.  Well I can see about the second part.  Anyway, for right now, I"m going to just sit back and watch what happens.  I'm kinda hoping more drivers will quit and then perhaps the remaining will get enough work to keep us busy and getting paychecks.  But, I have to have a run this weekend.  Even if it's a Cheniere run, I need something. 

Oh, and the driver I was talking to? He's the driver trainer.  They aren't losing some schmuck losing him, he's the go to when anyone has a question about what's going on. 

Well whatever.  Uneventful trip both ways? Not hardly.  I was driving along when one of my GPS alerted me to a "new route".  Huh? I looked at the map, Highway 59 had a really long yellow line on it and then an even longer red line. Meaning no one was moving and in that area? Had to be an accident.  The other GPS was showing the red line but not giving me a change of route.  I was hesitant at first, but I thought, this will only cost me a few extra minutes going around this,  I'll just do it. 

And Lord have mercy am I glad I did.  Because when I went through a couple of small towns and thorough some slow speed limit areas and finally back to Highway 59, it takes you on a bridge over 59 to get back to the other side. What did I see?  To the north a line of vehicles as far as the eye could see.  And right there, just past the bridge? Well it was a tractor trailer right.  It was blocking the entire highway- like as if it were crossing the highway from a side street.  Except, there was no side street there.  It was perplexing - but there was State Troopers on the south bound lanes - opposite side of the highway - standing under a gazebo they had put up - in the middle of the highway. I didn't know what I wasn't seeing, but for them to be doing that, it must have been bad. 

When I got on southbound 59 and got to the other side of the truck, it was one of the most gruesome sights I have ever seen. The vehicle - whatever it was - was just completely crumpled up into kind of a ball.  I found a story on it and a pic - but it just said at least one person was dead with no further info. Yeah I don't imagine anyone in that vehicle surviving.

Well whatever.  At least driving through Houston today was a breeze. Much faster than normal. 

I'm just a bit concerned about my income right now.  I'm still going to wait this out for a while and see what happens.  And fill out job applications here and there. 

Free day tomorrow - at least.  I'm going to smoke some ribs, have a fire, and try to get some stuff done.  And work out.  I say "at least" cause I don't know how long before I get another run.  But, tomorrow's paycheck? Pathetic. Reminds me of Ferguson days. Next week? I'll get nothing. 

It's late, I'm outta here.

Dang.
Note to self: Next time I find out I'm off for extended days off, look up airfare to Europe.
Less than $600 round trip?
There's a flight with a layover in Paris.  There's all kinds of flights, just that one had 3 layovers coming back. I like layovers in cases of trips to places you have never been before.
Only a couple hours tho, not much you can do in a couple of hours anywhere.

The point is simply that a $550 round trip flight over the ocean and going to Ireland?  I would have done that on a 3 day trip in a heartbeat. My bag is already packed, always is.  Trucker - and stuff.

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I finally, after a number of years, unfriended a Facebook friend.  A black person, openly anti-white and allowing her friends on her wall to consistently attack me, over and over and over, for years.  I had finally had enough when they all showed me the door and she did nothing about it to stop it. If people are being attacked on my wall, I'm going to do whatever to stop it. It was her anti-white stance, tho, that even tho we had some great conversations over the years - was what did it. I normally do not unfriend people like that. Note that I wouldn't unfriend a person on the basis of a political stance that is completely opposite of mine.  That's an entirely different thing. 

Anyway, final day off, I finally got the text for the run tomorrow to Brownsville. Obviously, I would love an extended detention down there to help with the time off.  I can hope, but I won't be let down if it doesn't happen. Next week's paycheck will have nothing on it.  Literally, not a single penny unless I opt to use vacation hours.  Debating that.  Maybe I'm not so broke that a missing week's paycheck doesn't matter. 

The only thing that really concerns me right now is that Caleb is now - suffering yet another setback. He's suffering from Bell Palsy.  Apparently it was caught in time before it got "wicked evil" is what I call it, for I have seen it's effects on a person's face first hand. And that person? It took well over a year to recover from it. I want to send him some money to help him out because he's been off work so long.  He's not a lazy, welfare consuming person. He has a good work either.  My dad used to help me out when I was hurting financially, I feel compelled to pay it forward. Note that my son didn't ask for money. 

_____________________

Well took care of that. 
Next on my agenda of spending even more money is getting my bottom front row of teeth fixed. This is something that should have been dealt with when I was a kid.  Should have been braces back then. But now?  One tooth is being pushed back from the 2 on either side and the 2 on either side of those 2.  My guess is the middle tooth will have to be removed and some form of braces to set the others in place.  Or something - whatever it is, it will cost thousands of dollars and I will go into even more debt. 

I went to a store called Ollie's today.  Never heard of it til' they came to this little town and opened up a shop here. My friends are all rave about it, have been rave about it since before the store actually opened. I just figured another "dollar store" type of thing, but I was quite pleasantly surprised, when, after taking Rene to Dollar General (she had no ride) and taking her back, I decided to get a bite to eat at the local Applebee's and then, there it is, right there in the same shopping center.  Went in and wow! The prices! 

I'm in this huge room with barren walls. They had canvas prints for unbelievably low prices and really nice looking stuff.  I mean, no Picassos but I'm happy.  3 of those and a small stand for my Keurig coffee maker - it currently sits on the bathroom sink - and a small heater for the bathroom - it's freeing cold in there in the morning, some new bath towels and I was happy. 

But it was this morning that threw me for a loop.  The phone rang, woke me up out of a dead sleep. It wasn't exactly early in the morning, I was sleeping in, again, on purpose. I didn't answer. It was Rene, tho I didn't answer because it was her, I wasn't fully awake and wasn't in the mood to talk to anyone.  That's the way I am in the morning. Let me wake up, take a shower, drink a cuppa then I can talk.

So I let the call go ---- only to get the same call coming in for a second time.  It rang 5 times before I finally answered it.  Long story short: the male tenant in the house over there admitted to the new female tenant that he does meth.  Oh, how wonderful!!  I mean, just so grand!  Yeah, I tell everyone before they move in there: NO DRUGS, THAT WILL GET YOU EVICTED. So, the new lady was talking about moving out to Rene. I mean, stop the manipulation, give me a chance for crying out loud.  When I say no drugs, I mean, NO DRUGS. We're not doing that shit and I won't tolerate it. If you have a prescription for a drug, wonderful. But if you're cranking on crack or meth, get the hell out of the house.  

So I just said great, let's get rid of him. I thought: I'm going to go through hell trying to find another tenant - yet again.  A month for this one that came in now - but she's a gem as far as I can tell. Not being sarcastic, she's really a sweet lady.  Now? I'll have to find another one, hopefully and potentially pay another month's worth of utilities. This is getting old, frankly.  I'm willing to ride this out for a while because otherwise, I have even more money at stake for a broken lease, but really? 

Ended that call only to get another one a few hours later: what if we worked with him to get off the drugs?  Huh.  They were all gung ho to get rid of him a phone call earlier and now they want to work with him.  Blahhhh.  I just listened. So, is Maria good with this? Maria is the new lady.  Yea, we were "just" talking about it before we called you. Okay!  This is all your choice, you have to deal with it, I don't have to live with it. I have heard nothing else back, he was cranking today and Rene didn't want to approach him until tomorrow and get past the high. 

See, if Rene can't make this work, which I have been pounding into her head - if you want this to work, you have to want to bad enough to make concessions, give and take, not make demands on other people living with you that are unreasonable - then I'm bowing out of this in April when the lease is up.  Yup, she knows this, I made this clear. Make it work. My name isn't going to be on the lease after April if you can't show that you can create an environment that causes people to want to live there.  I have zero desire to deal with this any further if this doesn't get better.

I don't want another month where I'm shelling out over $450 to pay for the utilities. 

Anyway, it's getting close to bed time, I have work in the morning. Finally.  And as always,  I at least hope I will get some detention down there. 

And, ongoing, still doing the Keto diet.  I'm down 26 pounds.  Which is only a pound down more than my last update on it - but it is  a pound down, not up.  My workouts, which haven't been that many, are resulting in extreme soreness, starting 2 days after the workout.  It will get better over time. 

But, with that, time to get offa here.

Getting into it.
My manager is apparently under the gun from drivers that are engaging in "backbiting and bitching going on". Well, truck drivers do that.  I think a lot of that stems from living in trucks and getting a rather shitty outlook on life.  It's compounded at our yard because there are literally no driver facilities there at all besides a bathroom.  No showers, no laundry, no driver room, no kitchen facilities excepting a microwave. It's very lame for a company making as much money as they are to leave people sitting in such conditions. These are drivers that rarely go home.

I do sympathize with the drivers in that department, but the bitching and backbiting has little to do with that. It's the slowdown and people sitting around much more than they are used to.  So everyone is trying to assess other's work load and whether it's fair or not.  Well, I didn't make near as much as some of these other drivers last year - they were up in the 6 figure department - but I don't care.  I don't want to be on the road as much as they are.  I am making very nice paychecks for the most part and tho I'm in the 80k range, that's more money than I've ever made. 

I've heard some of the bitching first hand.  Some of it is actually on par and they aren't really taking it to the manager, just people venting, I have no problem with that either. So I can only surmise that drivers are actually complaining to the manager herself about all of this slow down stuff.  Wait, I just remembered that one of the drivers said that several have gone in to her office complaining.  There's a fine line in my view to draw to keep yourself in good graces with a manager when it comes to complaining.

Although, from the Ferguson fiasco, there is definitely a time to address foul situations that shouldn't exist and even go above a manager's head if necessary.  None of that got me anywhere with that company, but it did  do one thing: weaned me enough of wanting to be at the place and now, even tho this company has a lot of middle and upper management issues, I'm much happier than when I was there.  I'm sure I could probably do better tho and I do put in an application here and there of a place that looks really good.....and by that, I mean excellent pay and home every night.  Long days? Sure but I already do 12 to 14 hour days, that's something I've finally gotten used to. 

I saw an ad yesterday of a place paying 82 cents per mile!  But out 6 days at a time. I just don't want to do that.  At least this job I might have a few times here and there where I'm out extended, but it is mitigated with enough runs where I get back in a day or 2 days. 

Anyway, she tried to tell me that I couldn't have a Brownsville run - which I changed my mind about Cheniere - cause of the bitching.  Well excuse me, but I didn't make this error on the scheduling, you did and you offered me Brownsville and I decided now that I want it, Cheniere won't hardly give me any miles to make up for lost time.  So then, she texted me while I was in the shower and then called me, so I called her back.  She simply stated that she would give me Brownsville.  I replied the only reason I asked is because I'll have been off for 6 days.  She agreed and that was the end of that.  I'm guessing she doesn't want me saying anything about it to anyone, and I won't.  It's not favoritism when everyone else gets a run and I don't. 

But I just figured that 2 days with a cheniere run is a waste of my time, I might as well take an extra day off but at least get something with some miles on it. And a potential for detention pay - but even without detention, the Brownsville run is a LOT more miles than Cheniere. 

Okay, well enough of that. Issue abated and moving on.  I've thought about my future with this company.  Switching over to the newly formed company but run by a competing company that runs it's trucks into the ground.  Do I want to spend my final working days here? Probably not.  Just it looks like I need at least 2 to even 4 years of hazmat tanker experience before any of these better, local companies will even consider me.  I get it: dangerous materials and very costly if you have a rollover, they are looking for the cream of the crop and they are putting up the wages to get them.

I've really got to try and make a decision.  Cause' it gets harder to quit a place the longer you've been there and the more benefits you start racking up. That was the case with Ferguson. I miss all that time off but I don't miss being broke.  I'm basically at the "final" stages of my working career.  Whatever I choose, it's going to have to be good enough to carry me into retirement.  If I get a good local offer, do I take it? Likely won't make as much money but a 5 grand decrease in pay for a better setup might be worth it.  I'll be 55 next month. If my health holds out, the earliest I can retire is 62.  Which isn't optimal for SS, better to wait at least 3 more years.  I dunno, but in the next few years several drivers where I'm working are going to retire, they are near the age. 

As for today? Nothing much.  It's cold outside, I've been burning fires every day except one since I got back from last trip.  I dunno if I"m going to do that today tho.  I instead think I should probably reorganize my room. I'm also interested in replacing this old futon I have in here for Adler.  I would like to get a new one that actually functions.  In other words, can be put in to "couch mode" easily. This one started falling apart so I have had it in bed mode for a long, long time now. 

It'd still be the dogs bed but I'd also put a plastic covering over the mattress to keep it from getting dogified.  Didn't do that with this one and it's pretty much ready to be discarded into the trash can.  A new futon isn't that much money anyway, I've seen decent ones for $160 range, delivered to your door.  I just want to make this room look nice and 2 whole beds taking up all the space isn't going to work for me.  It's really the only thing I spend money on , is upgrading the room.  I mean, yes I bought a vehicle but that was necessary. Anyway, I need to ask permission to get rid of this one it's not mine and I basically would be replacing theirs with a nicer one that doesn't have dog smell all over it.

Well anyway, I think I'll get out of the house and just go sightseeing or something.  Going stir crazy.             

Well Sunday.
Blahhh.
There is literally nothing - fun - to do.
Plenty of "stuff".
Clean my room, laundry, rake leaves, etc.
What I need is either a boat or a working 4 wheeler.
I can't figure out what's wrong with the big green one.
I'll have to hire someone to come out and figure it out for me I guess.
I'm pretty sure it's a fuel delivery problem tho.

I'm fixing to call that guy with the big party barge boat - otherwise known to us older generation as a pontoon boat. It's got a 90 horsepower motor on it which is enough to get it going fast enough to tow tubes. Tho this isn't the time of year to be in the icy cold water, it is always the time of year to go out to he middle of a big lake somewhere and go fishing.  The deck on the boat literally has nothing - the furniture is all missing, the only thing that is on there is the control panel.  And the cover is on there, but it's folded back to impossible to tell what condition it's in. Still, if the thing was cheap enough, it would be worth buying it and finding furniture to put on it.  They usually have a couch and at least a couple of living room style padded chairs.

Weight still going down very slowly compared to when I first started this diet, but the gut is rapidly disappearing.  Surrounded by chips, breads, crackers, potatoes, sugary treats and other forbidden things,  I have held my ground.  I'm sort of proud of that fact because I even survived the Holidays. 

_______________

Day is gone.  I spent a good deal of time working out with the new weight equipment.  My chest has turned into blubber and I am determined to change that.  I was going to wait until I was under 200 pounds, but that no longer interested me.  I can lose weight but there is still the element of conditioning and getting muscular again.  That will take some time. That will take quite some time, actually. Muscle isn't added quickly, not like fat.  My second workout, the first was bicep workout and it trashed my arms for 4 almost 5 days . Extremely sore. 

I'm guessing today's workout with different muscle groupings will result in the same. I figure that because by the time I was done working out, my entire body was quivering and shaking.  I can't bench press anything even remotely close to what I used to do.  Kind of unnerving.  Actually a bit disappointing.  It is what it is, now that there is a set sitting on the back porch, I can and will go out there whenever I'm home - and haven't already worked out - and spend half an hour out there more.

I also did a bunch of incline situps.  Lock your legs on the leg holders and fire it up.  The thing is sit at a steep, backward incline.  Pretty intense. By the time I had done 5 sets of those I was done for the day. 

It was the natural progression of this diet to start working out again. It was just a matter of when, not if.  Diets will lose the weight but they aren't going to rip your muscles. And frankly, all of my muscles were getting pretty small. The bicep workout a week ago showed very nice results after 7 days.  I didn't try to lift as much as I can today, I was just doing repetitions, but I remember the last time I was working out that I could do 75 more pounds of repetitions easily.  I'll work back up to it, hopefully anyway. I have no high expectations. I just had expectations of losing the weight.  Muscle gain isn't the highest priority, it's just a goal that can be met or not and I am fine with it either way. 

I mean, I'm going to be 55 in less than a month.  Getting old doesn't mean having to get fat but it  also shouldn't have unrealistic expectations, either. 

Everyone gone tomorrow, I'll likely get some stuff done around the house. As for now? Watch a movie lol. 

Drones have fascinated me since their inception and made public through news media and ample stories about them both for good and for bad. I fancied myself owning a nice one day, but not before I got a few cheap ones to figure out how to use them and probably crash them before figuring them out.  I don't really talk about it much, just something that interests me. 

I could see flying all over and taking pics or videos. Not that I want to see into people's back yards and what they are doing there, but in public.  I figure if someone were flying a drone over our back yard I'd want to shoot the thing down.  That's kind of peeping Tom territory in my view. But if you're out in the public, you are fair game. 

I got a drone for Christmas. I didn't ask for one,  I don't remember saying anything about drones recently at all.  My friends said, well, you exhibited interest in them so, here ya go!  It was a pleasant surprise.  It's a cheaper model - but that' exactly what you want to start out with.  Something if you crash and destroy it, it's not going to end your world.  Cause' those things? You can spend thousands of dollars on them if you so desire and have the spare money laying around. 

So for the past several days I've been quite miserably failing at flying the thing and crashing it. Fortunately not from any great height and it's survived some rather bad crashes lol.  But tonight? I finally started getting the hang of it.  This one won't just sit there and hover in place, it keeps moving around all the time so you have to keep moving the joysticks to keep it from crashing. That was what was the hard part:  starting out with one that won't just hover where it's at.

Apparently if you want one that does that, you are going to spend a lot more money on it. Yet, I thought, what better way to learn than to have to keep adjusting the controls to keep it from crashing into something?  My problem has been that I panic as soon as I start to lose control and then? I really lose control of it! lol.  A couple of times into the ceiling fan flung 15 feet. I figured it was toast after that but alas, I was wrong and happy to be wrong in those cases. Other much more minor crashes.  I guess they figure you're going to crash and break them, this one came with several extra fan blades. So far I haven't had to replace them. 

But as I continue to practice, the panic mode is going down and presence of mind staying longer to simply make the right maneuver to keep it from crashing.  The only thing about this one - and perhaps all of the cheaper models are like this - is that the battery only lasts about 10 minutes.  Maybe 15, haven't really kept track, just that it doesn't last very long and then you have to recharge it. That's a plus tho, it's a rechargeable battery. 

That's my current fascination. Not likely to go away, but very likely going to want to up grade to something you can fly with GPS and stability function.  And of course a good camera. I'll wait on that tho. I want to practice on this one - and buy another if this one breaks before I get good at it - until I feel very comfortable with it.  Like, no panicking and  no crashing.  I've been doing it both indoors and outdoors. The wind today was blowing that thing around and I wasn't having much luck with it outdoors, but indoors, I was in the kitchen several times just hovering it a few inches above the floor and just keeping it from crashing into anything. Right now that's my goal.  This one has features to do crazy maneuvers.  Hopefully I will be able to try those before I wear the thing out.

`But today has been an interesting day.  Besides one of the kid's birthday today, James also said he wants to start hunting next year.  Yay! I'll go hunting with you!  My elation was a bit subdued when he said he wants to do bow hunting.  That's nothing I have ever done.  But I don't think he has, either.  I dunno.  I guess there's  really more of a rush to hunting with a bow. You're going to have to be close, right there, to the deer or whatever you're hunting - but in these parts it's mostly deer - to kill it.  He said next year tho. We just got to this year. I'm not sure why it was next year but I would guess it's a money issue.  I'd offer to buy the stuff and we just go and do it. But I don't want to come off as the guy with money and those that don't.  People have dignity and I don't want to intrude on that. 

But another revelation today: someone at the company Taylor works at offered her to come and fish at his lake whenever. Hey that's pretty cool! The lake is stocked with catfish (not the biggest fan), bass and something else I can't remember. I like bass tho. 

Tomorrow, I'm calling the guy with the 28 foot party barge and see how much he wants for it. The boat looks in good condition, I don't know if the motor runs - that's a deal breaker if it doesn't - but there is no furniture on it.  It would need work and it would have to go at a cheap price to be worth buying. 

Look, I need more to do than just staying around the house when I'm off, or going to see a movie, or running around town.  Al well and fine, but I want entertainment and there are certain things that interest me that would provide that.  It doesn't need to cost a fortune, either. 

Anyway, Saturday - is almost over.  Listened to Trump giving a phone interview on Judge Jeanine's show a few minutes ago.  I'm not a big fan of Jeanine's but I watched to hear what Trump has to say about the shutdown.  The stakes are higher now with federal employees not getting paid and airports reporting too many sick call ins to keep everything running.  People will quit. They already are. 

Wait and see.....

That was it. My manager had my name on her pad, scratched it off without actually giving me a load to haul anywhere.  She called me this morning apologizing profusely.  Basically, it's 5 days off again.  She actually went into work - on a weekend - to find out what she had done.  I mean, what am I supposed to do? Bitch and moan about it? I just said I forgive you this time and chuckled.  I could make a huge issue out of it, but I think that now that this has happened, she probably won't do it again.  Good enough.  Of course, I could have had a good 2 or 3 day run out of those 5 days at least.......2 paychecks from now is going to not be so great. 

But, that sent me on a tizzy again looking for cheap airfare to Phoenix and it simply doesn't exist.  not like the "good ole days" when you could look up last minute air fare, airlines trying to sell out planes, and find the deals.  And yes, I checked all kinds of sites, the ones I have always used and some that I haven't.  $355 round trip from Dallas was the cheapest thing going, even with Spirit red eye flights.  Further searching revealed cheaper, red eyes that would have me in Phoenix for 24 hours and flying late at night. It's not really worth going over there without hitting at least one weekend day to visit friends on their weekend off.

Moving on and attempting to get that notion out of my head, I have today, tomorrow and Monday off now.  Do I take vacation hours? Or just eat it?  I dunno. 

But if I'm not going anywhere, productive use of the time is warranted.  There is a large amount of yard work that needs to be done.  I got a very good start on it a few weekends ago, but a lot of driving since then hasn't given me any time to further the activities.  Front yard needs totally raked up, back yard needs mowed and partially raked.  However, the next door neighbor - up from us - we're on a hill - never cleans their back yard and cleaning up the concrete over there is like a waste of time.  You clean it nice and then rain comes and washes all their s*** onto our property.  Just like it was before you cleaned it all up.  I was thinking of putting flashing that we have left over along the bottom of the fence line to stop the flow of their leaves, twigs, dirt and whatever else, but I suspect that would be a waste of time as well.

So I apparently have 5 days off total.  I didn't work yesterday, today and no work sent for the weekend which includes Monday.

I don't actually mind time off here and there. But I don't want this kind of time off on a regular basis.  But whatever. I was looking at airfare to Phoenix.  Why not? I could leave tomorrow and come back on Monday.  But, the airfare is excessive on last minute flights. I've tried a slew of different sights  and going to the airlines themselves.  Well, I guess I could afford it, just seems such a waste for a few days.

Yet, I'd love to visit my son in his time of suffering and just spend some time with him.  His hand is messed up, bad.  Wire and screws to put everything back together. 

I don't think so.  I'd take  a road trip somewhere for the fun of it, just don't know where to go.  Wish there were some mountains near here. 

I dunno. Sitting around here for 3 days seems like a waste. 

I might think of something, or I might succumb to do nothing.  One of the kids birthday celebration is tomorrow night, but it's nothing that I need to hang around for.  There will be a bunch of kids here for it and I can think of other things I could be doing.  Not to mention it's a short event.  Serve cake, hand out presents, bye!  Lol. 

No natural wonders around here - within a few hundred miles even that I know of - to check out.  The green 4 wheeler isn't working. Maybe I could figure that out tomorrow and go out riding?  Haven't done that in ages.

I saw a 28 foot party barge - a pontoon boat - on a side street for sale when I was coming home from a chicken joint here that sells baked chicken - keto friendly stuff.  No price on it and in need of work. The seats are all gone off of it.  But even if i bought the thing tomorrow? Now way it's ready to go this weekend. Not to mention Texas requires you to take some kind of course before you can boat on their waterways.

4 wheeling sounds good tho.  I think I'll try to figure out what's wrong with that thing tomorrow.  Take the dogs and they can trot along with me along the river.

Or not.  Just in a conundrum.  I'd really like to fly back to phoenix.  Red eye flight, one day there, come back that night, wasted, toasted, trashed as far as sleep goes? It's not worth it.  Better flights take it up to the $500 range. 

I'll just let this pass out of my mind. 

Just do stuff around here.  I dunno why I was snubbed for a weekend run.

But I'll find out. 

Then again, I wasn't making any friends today in the company. I made call, after call, after call to various locations around the US to find out why I am not receiving the break down of every single run, such as was given until - today.  I was getting quite irritated, especially with a certain lady operating incoming calls in Ohio. 

I've been annoyed ever since those phone calls.  I really shouldn't have to go through all of that just to speak with the payroll department. 

Whatever.