I don't know what I'm doing.
I just play it as it comes along.
Neighbors want wars, I try to disengage.
When they bring it to my doorstep, I just do what I think is right.
Or, I'm trying to get in line with the Lord and all kinds of
temptation hits me. Resist it? Yes. Resisting, kind of hard work,
actually. Human nature and desire is pretty strong stuff, I must admit.
Trying to get back into church? Ummm, lol. If anyone has read this blog
at length, then you know the internal wars that go on when church time
comes. I'm getting much better at that, though. 9:30AM Sunday morning
comes, I'm hopping in the shower, getting dressed, and out the door for
the 10:00 am service. But the mind still battles.
But my old pastor wanting to restart some kind of relationship?
That was a curve ball that my son threw at me last night - though I
seriously doubt he fully understands what that all means to me and
I figure this Sunday meeting he wants to have over coffee - though I
insisted on dinner at say, Applebee's, why not? - we might go into
all of that if he really wants to hear that story. If he doesn't,
no sweat off my back, but he is a part of that family - my ex-pastor's -
as much as a part of his own parents. I've never held it against him
to have that kind of relationship with those people.
But I do wonder where all of this is going.
Or what about this travel trailer business and getting one up
on my mother's property? This seemingly came out of nowhere.
I mean, I came up with that idea, I think. It seemed to be the
thing to do: get up to the mountains and have a place to crash out in
and even watch a bit of TV if I want to, but mostly enjoy a nature and
also spend a bit more time with my mom.
But this stuff just comes at me. I'm very perplexed by this
situation with my ex-pastor, because he shunned me in church.
Not, we were sitting in a private office and this situation occurred -
which would have been bad enough - but in a church service. Not that he
declared it to everyone. He certainly made it unerringly known to me,
that's for sure.
I wonder if I could find it within myself to go there.
I would first have to answer the question as to WHY I would want
to even think about going there after all that has transpired.
However, there is one thing that I am at least 99% percent sure that
is not going to happen: I will not be getting back together with
my ex-wife, a string I would have to believe is attached to such
an event.
I dunno. Life is pretty strange stuff at times, maybe most of the time.
Eddie - the kid that has been walking Coco 3 days in a row - wanted to take
Duke today. I was hesitant about that. Duke is bigger than Eddie in both size
and weight. He's a nice doggy but sometimes gets in his head that another dog
is some sort of threat and goes after it. I let him take Duke with some
instruction about Duke around other dogs - just don't let it happen.
Well, they were gone a LONG time. I was out front, working on the yard, some
pretty tedious work if I do say so myself. It's going to take a while to get
it all done. Something like 90 minutes later they returned. Of course: walking
around a dog THAT large garners attention and you get to talk to people about "your"
dog. Still, I freely admit after that much time passing that I was starting to get
worried.
Tomorrow? The rodeo tenant wants to take one of the dogs up into the mountain preserve -
trailhead 2 blocks from my house. Yeah, go for it. I suggested Coco since she lasts much
longer and is also not a problem with people or dogs. If the guy rides horses and bulls,
I can pretty much trust him with one of my dogs.
Me? I want to continue with the front yard. There is so much rock to move around, yikes!
I am watching the final game of the World Series. At least at this point, it's not looking to good for the Rangers. Walking runs in = not a good thing, especially in the most important game of the entire season. Well, that happened earlier but certainly a defining moment in the game. I am a fan of neither team, but I like it to be a good game, especially this one. Whoever wins - takes the Championship.
G'nite.
ben
Friday, October 28, 2011
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