So I have some sort of sores that have developed overnight in the roof of my mouth.  Weird that it happened that quickly and had such a ridiculous effect on eating and drinking.  I'm going to try to get into the dentist or doctor today to have it checked out.  I read about possible causes. They all say to give it a week or so and see if it just fixes itself, that they eventually go away.  But I don't necessarily think it's such a great idea as one of the issues it says it could be is mouth cancer and it's best found early as it is far more treatable.  

Yea I hope I don't have mouth cancer, that would pretty much ruin my life, doncha think?

Anyway, after the exchange between the dispatcher and I last night, I heard nothing more.  I at least half expected my manager would be contacting me this morning about it.  Or, the dispatcher's manager - who is really cool and used to give me a good mix of decent runs and low paying runs - but never giving me a bunch of crappy runs in a row or having me working 2 out of 5 days and making a gross total of $450 in that 5 day span unless we were absolutely out of work.  

That is simply not the case.  I know because my manager told me that it was odd I was not working as much when several other drivers are on a 34 hour reset.  Well you only need a 34 hour reset if you've worked 70 hours in the last 8 days.  I could do 3 Brownsville run in that amount of time.  Or a palm pennsylvania and a Brownsville run. Or whateer.

So I dunno what's going to happen now.  Just ignoring me isn't going to make me go away or the problem disappear.  I'm guessing that since I haven't heard from my manager about this, she either said nothing to anyone, or presented it to her manager, or presented it to her manager and my manager and for whatever reasons they aren't saying anything.  

I dunno, but I don't get a run - and a decent one at that - tomorrow I'm just going to continue on - respectfully and courteously of course, nothing rude, demeaning or demanding - with it until someone actually says something to me.  At this point, tho I don't really want to start looking for another job, I could actually considering taking a pay cut to be home more often and that one job - home every weekend.  My expenses are not that great and I never did the deal where you earn more money and your lifestyle upgrades with it - meaning spending money on stuff you never used to or buying things you would never buy otherwise.  

My house pays for itself, I have utility payments here that I am responsible for every month.  I have a car payment that is still 2 years before it's paid off.  I have some credit card debt and a couple of loans.  Even going back down to the 3 grand per month net range I could still make it work, probably wouldn't have my 401k deductions set so high as they are now and other savings, but I can live with that.

What I wouldn't like too much, tho, is the idea of not having the money to be able to do this entire project which is, hopefully, coming up soon.

The point in saying all of that? I understand the company I work for is just another trucking company that views you as a number on a computer screen.  Drivers having conversations about it? We came to the conclusion we are all expendable, like piles of household trash, they can get rid of us as easily as keep us.  So, making "waves" about my workload, I took that into consideration.  The "like or leave it" mentality, the "don't let the door hit your @$$ on the way out" type of thinking that I have grown accustomed to in my trucking career.  Well, not quite so much now, the demand for drivers is high. That doesn't necessarily mean the pay for drivers is also high, but the median wage is going up.  Making a minimum 60k per year is pretty much mandatory excepting in some local jobs where they think they can take advantage of you and give you in the 40 to 50 k range.  

I think 60k is the lowest I would go in considering a new job and I would not be willing to enter a rat race where they're working you to death and you never see the doorframe of the house you live in excepting once every couple of weeks.  Or just make a job change altogether.  i saw an ad for a forklift operator fair that is going to go on next month here at the convention center.  I'm a bit rusty but my forklift skills are A plus, I'm as good as anyone out there after a dozen years of operating one to pull parts and load trucks.  No, I wouldn't be making 90k per year doing that, lol, but I'm so tired of the trucking industry. Not just my job, but the trucking industry as a whole.  The amount of federal regulations.  The constant meddling by state troopers pulling you over for no reason except to do inspections - which they can legally do.  The companies installing inward facing cameras and monitoring everything you do.

I can remain hopeful, tho, that this current situation will improve and I won't have to or be forced to go look for a new job. Again, I was not disrespectful at all - but...these Oklahoma runs don't make a decent paycheck.  Well, 3 of them per weeks would amount to .... around $1,400 per week gross pay.  I guess I could make that work now that I think of it.  But only if I got 3 per week and make up somewhere else if/when that plant shuts down.  Doing the math and making assumptions about the average pay, it would gross 72,000 per year.  

I would be home much more often.  I actually might think about that now that I looked at the numbers.  No one would care if I took only Oklahoma runs, no one likes them because they are low paying.  But it's an easy run, out the first whole day and usually back by noon or a little later the next day, depending on load time.  Nah, not right now I don't want to do that. If I ever get this business up and running I could think about asking for that, close to home and able to be there the next day at the latest if something arises.  However, I am going to need someone to do small repair jobs if I continue to work and be able to get over there fairly expediently. It would keep me on health care and I doubt the company would care about that truck only doing that run. As long as it makes them X amount of money, they are good with it. It's an old truck, they likely don't owe anything on it so that's an expense they don't even have to make with it.  In fact, none of our trucks are new by any stretch of the imagination.  

James can do that, of course, but, he has a full time job and he's going to school. Yet, he's still looking for side jobs on top of all of that. To be young again, lol, I simply don't have that kind of energy any more.  I have energy, just not that much of it.  I like taking naps here and there now.  

So it's whatever, perhaps I made my case and just shut up about it now.  If they don't like it and tell me to leave, I will do so and I will have no regrets.  I'm not going to start looking for new jobs just yet tho, the one I saw the other day popped up on my screen from a saved search I have in one of those job search engines.  It was definitely intriguing.  Hazmat tanker, I don't know what they haul, but they adamantly stated that it's weekend off and home either every night or possibly out 2 or 3 days. Well I already do that now, that wouldn't be much of a lifestyle change.

Well, it would be a change that I would have weekends off. I heard a driver complaining to my manager yesterday at the office about wanting at least one weekend off per month.  I get what he's saying, but I also get that my taking weekend work gets me good runs a lot of the time - except recently.  I've gotten so used to working weekends that I don't even think about it anymore.  Well sometimes I do when I see people going to church and think, gee, it would be good to get back into church again. Kind of difficult when you're on the road all the time.  

I do know that some drivers refuse to work weekends.  I dunno how they get away with it, I guess because enough of us will take whatever comes our way at whatever day of the week we get it.  I never asked about it because I really don't care.  I do care about the drivers that are getting special privileges in the types of runs they are getting.  One driver boasted to me the other day that he got "only Brownsville and Oklahoma runs for 2 months. It got kind of boring".  Yea, he was making bank and he left out the part that he demanded that situation because of Cornoavirus and making excuses to get his way.  That's what these drivers do, they make up stories to get their way about things and for some reason, management/dispatch allows it.  Hence, my request - I didn't demand anything - that I get more work.  

So here it is, day 5 of nothing pay.  No one would be expected to live off of $450 gross pay per week. After taxes, health insurance and 401k deduction, I'd have in the low $200 range.  Lol.  This is what I told the dispatcher yesterday and she couldn't and didn't even try to refute it.  

So what will I get tomorrow, if anything? An Oklahoma run to spite me? Lol.  An out of state run to make me go away? Not likely a Brownsville run.  I dunno, but if they're sending me out of state, I'd like to know about it pretty soon so I can get the keto cook to make me some dinners for the road.  

Seriously think I should at least go to Urgent Care and have this thing checked out. At least get a doctor's eyes on it and get some kind of determination of what it is. If that includes blood tests, I'm definitely not going to like that, at all. I get nauseaus and I come close to passing out when they draw blood.  Call me a wuss, I'll take it, it's a life long thing. I have to be laying down to give blood, and I have to be able to lay there for a while.  It just makes me feel funny.  If they did take blood, they might as well take extra and check my cholesterol levels while we're at it. 

Ugh, that doesn't sound very ... fun.  

Property? Nothing new there.  Just the lender asking the question about which side of the property I was getting.  But checked email just now anyway, lol, he sends stuff and I sometimes don't see it for a while, but there's nothing there.  The appraisal they are going to do or are doing?  Should come back good for the price per acre.  I'm trying to put all of that out of my mind for the moment.  I've done so much research I'm kind of done with doing that for a while.  It's not helping me do anything ATM anyway. It has prepared me for the potential day that we close and it's all mine, a sketch of an idea what to start with at least.  Lots of people saw my comment on a local facebook group - no it wasn't a post I put up, it was a comment on someone asking about getting land cleared and I mentioned I would potentially need those services done as well - and they contacted me via messenger.  We can do it! How much?  We'd have to look at it! Or, my grandson (adult version thanks) does this kind of work, here is his number! and others just saying they can do it.  

Of course they can do it. With proper equipment, land clearing is probably one of the easiest jobs they do and makes good money doing it.  The lowest I've found so far is $75 per hour - that includes the machinery and the operator.  That's not bad.  The next was $125 per hour and I thought that wasn't that bad.  I'd take the $75 per hour guy as long as he has some good reviews somewhere.  The rest were a "take a look and give you a flat price" for it deal.  I don't think I want to go that route. I'd rather pay by the hour and get as much as I need done at likely a cheaper price than some flat price where they crank it up.  But, I might have one come out and take a look and see what they offer.  

Or rent the machine, take a week off from work and do it myself.  Just not sure at this point in time which is the most cost effective.  I have no experience clearing land, tho I do have experience operating earth moving equipment. I doubt it's that hard. But I have to factor in $650 per week to rent the machine, plus fuel, plus not working.  A "normal" week - forget the recent complaints - is anywhere from $1,750 to $2,800 gross pay.  So, losing that plus $650?  Well, do the math, likely cheaper to just hire someone out to do it for me.  Average 2 grand for lost pay plus the $650 and nothing else and that equals 34 plus hours of the $75 per hour dude.  That's a lot of hours. 4 plus 8 hour days and I only want about 4 acres of the property cleared out at the beginning.  I doubt it would take that long, in fact, I would want more of the property cleared out if I was going that route.  Let's get 6 or even 8 acres done. The rest I could do later on, clearing out brush and creating walking trails.  

See? These things swirl around in mind endlessly, hence I want to try to turn it all off for a while. 

Well, I just remembered my manager asking me to do the endless online training stuff that they demand we do.  So, I'm offa here, going to do that and eventually decide whether to go to the doc or wait a few days and see what happens. 

G'day